If your kids generally don't do chores, has it been positive/negative for them?

[Anonymous]

I have a friend who grew up with many household staff and who never did any chores. It showed. We were traveling together and he could not even make scrambled or boiled eggs for breakfast.

[Anonymous]

Wow, I'm actually shocked at the number of ppl who grew up not doing any chores, poor or rich! Sheesh...AND my parents outsourced! I still had to tidy my room before the maids came, make my bed every morning, learn to do laundry in middle school and take care of my own clothes. Actually, I remember once I didn't tidy my room knowing the maid was coming the next day, and my mom told the maid to skip my room.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband never did chores as a child and grew up in kind of a dirty home. It’s a little frustrating sometimes because he doesn’t seem to realize that they need to be done or how long they take. He has had periods in his own in the house for a few weeks here and there, and when I get back, he tells me that the fang shui is off or that we need to redecorate. No man, you need to vacuum and dust and do your laundry. And it takes a couple of hours.
There are a lot of things I love about him, but this drives me nuts.

My husband is similar, but his single mom definitely had a dirty home. He still has trauma over roaches because of an infestation and subsequent bombing where they had to clean up all of the dead bugs.

He's pretty good about cleaning because his mom was so disgusting while I was the one who never really did chores growing up, so I drove him nuts by not cleaning as I go when making food. However, now that we have kids, I'm the one more obsessed with cleaning, since babies will literally find and lick food off the floor.

I'd love a housekeeper... but believe we should be teaching our kids to clean and I worry they're growing up too privileged.

You can still teach your kids to clean with a housekeeper - get one who comes once a week and there is still plenty of cleaning to do the other six days (i.e. make your bed every day, clear the tables and wash the dishes after every meal, do your laundry, the list goes on and on). Also, if you have money to afford a housekeeper, then your kids are going to grow up privileged. Instead of martyring yourself cleaning your house in order to teach them a lesson, find other ways to make them appreciate their privilege. I tell my kids all the time that they are privileged and, as a result, I expect more from them. I won't tolerate mean behavior, including staying silent when someone else is mistreating another person. I expect them to use their time and money to help people who aren't as privileged. Expecting them to not act privileged because they have to clean the house is...odd.