Does the mess get better as kids get older? What age?

Anonymous
My kids must play differently than some of yours. My 5 and 7 year old just today had a lego village next to a magnatile castle with a variety of different figurines living there. They had created some props with paper and markers which were spread around. They were cooking a castle feast with their toy food and had dressed themselves up for the feast.

This one toy at a time thing wouldn’t work. Unless you all have very young kids still?
Anonymous
I don’t get the one toy at a time thing either. What happens if they get out another toy while you are putting the baby down for a nap or you are in the shower? Do you punish them?
What if they start playing with things that aren’t toys? Is that allowed? What if they have to go to the bathroom? Do they have to pick up the toys they were playing with before they leave the room? Or do you make them come back and play the same game when they are done? They aren’t allowed to decide from the bathroom that maybe they would like go to their room to look at books for a little bit and come back to the legos later?

I don’t know. This seems like a lot of work.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We have a 2 year old and an infant and our house is generally pretty clean. We stay on top of it and the toddler knows she has to put something away before taking something new out. She helps clean up the infant's stuff too. What also helps I'm sure is we just don't have a lot of stuff and everything has a place (even if it's in a basket or bin).


Ha! Your oldest is two!

Wait until you get to the legos, puzzles, art supplies, doll clothes, magnetiles, dress up clothes, etc.


I agree. Things got much messier when my kid was a little older. There are more, and smaller, pieces. And her imaginative play was sometimes quite extensive, and involved multiple kinds of toys. You couldn't tell her to put one thing away before taking something else out, because she was building houses for her My Little Ponies out of Legos and Magnatiles, for example, and the houses were decorated, so that meant she was using her art supplies, too, and the Hatchimals were their pets, etc.
Anonymous
Aw, this is so precious. Just wait.

--parent of teens
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Aw, this is so precious. Just wait.

--parent of teens


+100. Mom of a teen and four young adults.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We have a 2 year old and an infant and our house is generally pretty clean. We stay on top of it and the toddler knows she has to put something away before taking something new out. She helps clean up the infant's stuff too. What also helps I'm sure is we just don't have a lot of stuff and everything has a place (even if it's in a basket or bin).


Ha! Your oldest is two!

Wait until you get to the legos, puzzles, art supplies, doll clothes, magnetiles, dress up clothes, etc.


I agree. Things got much messier when my kid was a little older. There are more, and smaller, pieces. And her imaginative play was sometimes quite extensive, and involved multiple kinds of toys. You couldn't tell her to put one thing away before taking something else out, because she was building houses for her My Little Ponies out of Legos and Magnatiles, for example, and the houses were decorated, so that meant she was using her art supplies, too, and the Hatchimals were their pets, etc.


I would add, our rule is that you have to clean up when you are done with the toys (so, you're done playing with dolls and now you want to play a board game, you clean up the dolls). But we don't make her disassemble all the houses, etc., just move them out of the middle, find a place to set them near the shelves, etc., because she often has put a lot of effort into them and absolutely will play with them again. The one-toy-at-a-time people must have little kids.
Anonymous
As you can see from responses, people who couldn’t control toddlers’ messes also can’t control teens’ messes. My house was never a mess a growing up at any age and my house with current kids now has never been a mess at any age
Anonymous
When they go to college.
Anonymous
It only gets better when the kids are old enough to entertain themselves with their smartphones. Which will make you wish for the messy house.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:As you can see from responses, people who couldn’t control toddlers’ messes also can’t control teens’ messes. My house was never a mess a growing up at any age and my house with current kids now has never been a mess at any age


I think people place different values on neatness v. creativity. Some people think that kids should be allowed to play freely, pulling toys from all over and making the biggest lego/magnatile/LOL doll village ever, because that encourages creativity. And it should stay for days because they'll keep using it. Others value neatness and organization more and would never allow that to happen. Only a few things out at a time and everything gets put away at the end of the day. Up to you where you draw the line.

I'm not saying one way is better than the other. We probably lean toward the former, but sometimes I wonder if I'm shortchanging my kids not teaching them enough organization and neatness. I think you can't have it all -- if you're extremely neat, you probably are sacrificing something in terms of creativity. If you give the kids free rein, you can't really expect your house to snap back into a neat-as-a-pin state at the end of the day.
Anonymous
I have teens - it is much worse now than when they were little. Just wait!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Aw, this is so precious. Just wait.

--parent of teens

I have teens AND toddlers. The toddlers are definitely still messier. Teens have trashed bedrooms but I don’t care as long as they clean up once a week for cleaners.
So, not my experience.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We have a 2 year old and an infant and our house is generally pretty clean. We stay on top of it and the toddler knows she has to put something away before taking something new out. She helps clean up the infant's stuff too. What also helps I'm sure is we just don't have a lot of stuff and everything has a place (even if it's in a basket or bin).


Ha! Your oldest is two!

Wait until you get to the legos, puzzles, art supplies, doll clothes, magnetiles, dress up clothes, etc.

+1 yep.


Disagree. I have older preschoolers and they do clean up. You just have to start young. My 12 month old knew how to clean up after himself.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:My kids must play differently than some of yours. My 5 and 7 year old just today had a lego village next to a magnatile castle with a variety of different figurines living there. They had created some props with paper and markers which were spread around. They were cooking a castle feast with their toy food and had dressed themselves up for the feast.

This one toy at a time thing wouldn’t work. Unless you all have very young kids still?


I didn't say anything about one toy at a time, but I do make my kids put everything away when they are done with it So in your humble bragged situation, everything would be put away before dinner. Or if they were going to continue to play after dinner, they could leave it but would have to put it away before bedtime. If it's something elaborate and not in the way, they're allowed to keep it up until they're done with it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:As you can see from responses, people who couldn’t control toddlers’ messes also can’t control teens’ messes. My house was never a mess a growing up at any age and my house with current kids now has never been a mess at any age


I think people place different values on neatness v. creativity. Some people think that kids should be allowed to play freely, pulling toys from all over and making the biggest lego/magnatile/LOL doll village ever, because that encourages creativity. And it should stay for days because they'll keep using it. Others value neatness and organization more and would never allow that to happen. Only a few things out at a time and everything gets put away at the end of the day. Up to you where you draw the line.

I'm not saying one way is better than the other. We probably lean toward the former, but sometimes I wonder if I'm shortchanging my kids not teaching them enough organization and neatness. I think you can't have it all -- if you're extremely neat, you probably are sacrificing something in terms of creativity. If you give the kids free rein, you can't really expect your house to snap back into a neat-as-a-pin state at the end of the day.


You're right. I'm going to go make a bunch of messes right now to improve my creativity.
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