At what grade did your kid start sacrificing sleep for homework, activities, etc.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My exH never could handle homework so starting in 3rd grade, we were cutting down fun activities so DD could finish her HW before heading to his house for the weekly stay over. By 6th grade, she was starting to stay up late

We’re heading into HS. The last judge we had sucked. He said he thought we had a good system and it didn’t matter if dad isn’t able to provide an ideal hw environment. All I asked for was a designated space like a desk in her room over there and time when dad’s friends aren’t wandering in and out drinking beer and playing loud music.


Buy her a desk for $40. How is it so hard? Or even a lap table for $10 for her bed. HW is not going to be a judge's priority over a relationship.


I didn’t ask for a change in custody, only that her dad make the changes I spoke of. I even offered a desk. The judge said he was free to parent as he saw fit. So no desk and happy hour continues.
Anonymous
DS needed to learn to balance with our support if he wanted to continue to play sports that took up a lot of time. That meant not wasting time before or after practice and starting homework immediately. He goes to bed earlier on nights he’s not out late with games or later practices. He’d be an emotional mess if we took him out of sports. He sleeps in on the weekends if he can. He catches up on sleep on his light days.
Anonymous
Senior at TJ started sacrificing sleep occasionally in 9th. When the homework load picked up in 10th, it became a regular thing. During band season and her spring sport, she is frequently out of the house 7am to 8 pm and up until after midnight. She pulled an all nighter last night finishing end of the quarter work, which if course is die the same day as EA apps. Ugghh.

10th grader at a strong base school is very organized and efficient. I would like her to go to bed around 10, but once a week or so she is up until 11. But her main EC is just now getting going at full speed. She can miss her EC occasionally, and is good about working ahead and skipping her EF if she has a lot of work. But, I think this winter and junior/senior years are going to be harder.

if you have a kid in ES who is already missing sleep, you need to get a handle on that. Cut down the ECs, drop your kid out of AAP, work hard to establish good homework habits— something. It’s only going to get worse in HS, and that pace isn’t sustainable over years.

Anonymous

My 2e high school freshman chose a very ambitious academic schedule, but finds it very hard to do all the homework because of his low processing speed and disability in math. Right now he is struggling to get enough sleep. "Twice exceptional" children (gifted yet with learning disabilities) are nightmares to educate to their potential, since it's very hard to manage both their desire for intellectual challenge and support their areas of weakness.
Anonymous
DC in 7th. Not yet. Sleep is a priority in our home, period. It's fine on occasion to go into a sleep deficit, for lack of a better description, but not regularly.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:It's INCREDIBLY hard in HS. Even if your kid is not overscheduled. They also think they know best. Let your 5th grader sleep. Forget the HW.


Amen. Homework in 5th is in all likelihood not helping him intellectually anyway.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My exH never could handle homework so starting in 3rd grade, we were cutting down fun activities so DD could finish her HW before heading to his house for the weekly stay over. By 6th grade, she was starting to stay up late

We’re heading into HS. The last judge we had sucked. He said he thought we had a good system and it didn’t matter if dad isn’t able to provide an ideal hw environment. All I asked for was a designated space like a desk in her room over there and time when dad’s friends aren’t wandering in and out drinking beer and playing loud music.


Buy her a desk for $40. How is it so hard? Or even a lap table for $10 for her bed. HW is not going to be a judge's priority over a relationship.


I didn’t ask for a change in custody, only that her dad make the changes I spoke of. I even offered a desk. The judge said he was free to parent as he saw fit. So no desk and happy hour continues.


That sounds awful. My heart goes out to you.
Anonymous
Definitely not until high school.

One kid had a practice that ran late 1 night per week when he was in middle school.

Now that they are in HS, there have been two days that I can remember where I only saw them for a few minutes. Their school doesn't start until 9:15 so they are in bed when I leave for work. Then one doesn't get home from practice until close to 10. I'm sometimes in bed then and he'll come in to say hey and let me know he's home.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My DS is short and will be short as an adult (genetics). He stopped his sport at the end of 7th grade and didn't do anything in 8th grade. He grew 4 inches that year because he got so much sleep. I will never again allow him to do so much that he isn't getting enough sleep. It isn't worth it. He will never be enough of an athlete, musician, etc to get the type of recognition that colleges want to see.


Seriously? You think he grew because he got more sleep?


I am not the PP, but believe growth is related to sleep. I am homeschooled my son who was in 5th grade last year because I had to frequently travel to another country to help my parents. My 5th grade son wanted to come because he has several cousins his age. My 7th grade son wanted to stay in school so ended up not get a lot of sleep due to sports and homework. My 5th grade son slept in everyday and went from waking up at 6:30 or 7 to waking up at 9. By the end of the school year, my fifth grader had grown 3 to 4 inches ended up almost as tall as his brother.
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