Baby naming ceremony dilemma

[Anonymous]

Join a synagogue and host it there as part of the weekly Shabbat services.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do it at a Rec Center or your backyard, get food from Costco.

We live in a pretty small apartment with no outdoor space that can be used. Unfortunately even 20 people will be tight and trust me that in this group almost everyone will show.

Can’t you rent a park pavilion?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The last baby naming I went to was in a room at a synagogue and had bagels and lox for everyone. I can’t imagine it cost 5k

How nice for YOU. The last baby naming I went to was at MY HOME, where we served quality food, good champagne, and hired a high schooler to entertain the preschool/toddlers during the ceremony. We had 75-80 people. I can easily imagine it cost around $3k. Not everyone is satisfied with grocery store bagels and lox.

I think pp was just describing one perfectly reasonable way that it could be done cheaply. You sound offended somehow.

+1. What is with the offense? Weird.

[Anonymous]

We did an open house so people could come and go within a time frame. This worked out pretty well given that I have a very small house

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are religious enough to have a naming ceremony but don’t belong to a synagogue?

Np - this isn’t unusual. Even Jews who aren’t affiliated (yet) want to observe this tradition. Plus, most charge room rental fees to members too. In terms of the Op, I assume if grandma and grandpa had a house that would fit everyone they would have offered.

Pp here. Seems strange to me. I’m a lapsed/non practicing Methodist. I can’t imagine have a christening for my baby with no church affiliation. It just seems like a gift grab/give us attention type thing then.

[Anonymous]

A county rec room shouldn’t be too pricey. Can you try to time it so people aren’t expecting a full meal? Like 2:30/3pm? You can easily get away with serving just fruit and a sheet cake that says mazel tov at that time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The last baby naming I went to was in a room at a synagogue and had bagels and lox for everyone. I can’t imagine it cost 5k

How nice for YOU. The last baby naming I went to was at MY HOME, where we served quality food, good champagne, and hired a high schooler to entertain the preschool/toddlers during the ceremony. We had 75-80 people. I can easily imagine it cost around $3k. Not everyone is satisfied with grocery store bagels and lox.

I think pp was just describing one perfectly reasonable way that it could be done cheaply. You sound offended somehow.

+1. What is with the offense? Weird.

+1. This is DC urban moms-many of us don’t have a backyard and many families don’t have the means to have expensive food for 80 people. It seems to me that the PP bragging about the event has lost sight of the religious nature of the event. It’s not an occasion that requires showing off.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The last baby naming I went to was in a room at a synagogue and had bagels and lox for everyone. I can’t imagine it cost 5k

How nice for YOU. The last baby naming I went to was at MY HOME, where we served quality food, good champagne, and hired a high schooler to entertain the preschool/toddlers during the ceremony. We had 75-80 people. I can easily imagine it cost around $3k. Not everyone is satisfied with grocery store bagels and lox.

I think pp was just describing one perfectly reasonable way that it could be done cheaply. You sound offended somehow.

+1. What is with the offense? Weird.

+1. This is DC urban moms-many of us don’t have a backyard and many families don’t have the means to have expensive food for 80 people. It seems to me that the PP bragging about the event has lost sight of the religious nature of the event. It’s not an occasion that requires showing off.

Apparently the OP is not religious.

[Anonymous]

OP, do you know anyone who lives in an apartment building with a community room? Residents can often rent them for free or under $200. Then all you need to do is arrange for the rabbi and get grocery-store catering.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are religious enough to have a naming ceremony but don’t belong to a synagogue?

Np - this isn’t unusual. Even Jews who aren’t affiliated (yet) want to observe this tradition. Plus, most charge room rental fees to members too. In terms of the Op, I assume if grandma and grandpa had a house that would fit everyone they would have offered.

Pp here. Seems strange to me. I’m a lapsed/non practicing Methodist. I can’t imagine have a christening for my baby with no church affiliation. It just seems like a gift grab/give us attention type thing then.

Lapsed Catholic here, I did not baptize my child because I do not belong to a Parish and I am not interested in belonging to a Parish. But that was my choice. My older brother baptized all their kids even though they never stepped foot in Church. They knew it was important to both sets of Grandparents and were comfortable baptizing the kids.

Different people have different ties to religious ceremonies that are also culturally important. I'll let folks make decisions based on what is important to them.

[Anonymous]

Why not just do it at the synogogue during a service? We did ours on a Saturday morning, but the synagogue also offered Friday night as an option. They can likely accommodate a large number of people and give you space to have a lunch/dinner afterward. In our case, there was no cost for the ceremony, we just made a donation to the synagogue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why not just do it at the synogogue during a service? We did ours on a Saturday morning, but the synagogue also offered Friday night as an option. They can likely accommodate a large number of people and give you space to have a lunch/dinner afterward. In our case, there was no cost for the ceremony, we just made a donation to the synagogue.

Oh, I want to add - we are not members of a synagogue. I just called up one that was close to us and they were extremely gracious and helpful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The last baby naming I went to was in a room at a synagogue and had bagels and lox for everyone. I can’t imagine it cost 5k

The problem is that we don’t belong to a synagogue so the rates are higher. The room is like $1K for 3 hours, then you have catering high isn’t cheap even if minimal, cost for the rabbi, etc. It just all adds up. I have called like 5 synagogues and it’s all the same.

Can I ask where you called? This was not the case for us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are religious enough to have a naming ceremony but don’t belong to a synagogue?

Np - this isn’t unusual. Even Jews who aren’t affiliated (yet) want to observe this tradition. Plus, most charge room rental fees to members too. In terms of the Op, I assume if grandma and grandpa had a house that would fit everyone they would have offered.

Pp here. Seems strange to me. I’m a lapsed/non practicing Methodist. I can’t imagine have a christening for my baby with no church affiliation. It just seems like a gift grab/give us attention type thing then.

Lapsed Catholic here, I did not baptize my child because I do not belong to a Parish and I am not interested in belonging to a Parish. But that was my choice. My older brother baptized all their kids even though they never stepped foot in Church. They knew it was important to both sets of Grandparents and were comfortable baptizing the kids.

Different people have different ties to religious ceremonies that are also culturally important. I'll let folks make decisions based on what is important to them.

Agree with this. For me, Judaism is cultural more than religious, and it's important to bring my child into that culture. That said, I also haven't joined a synagogue yet, so I totally identify with the OP. Lots of the important holidays are celebrated at home and with friends and family. Before kids, I just went to 6th & I for the important stuff like High Holidays, and they don't have the same membership structure. After kids... well, I promise I'll get around to joining a synagogue some day I don't think Jewish babies get gifts for naming ceremonies as far as I know, so I wouldn't call this a gift grab at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are religious enough to have a naming ceremony but don’t belong to a synagogue?

Np - this isn’t unusual. Even Jews who aren’t affiliated (yet) want to observe this tradition. Plus, most charge room rental fees to members too. In terms of the Op, I assume if grandma and grandpa had a house that would fit everyone they would have offered.

Pp here. Seems strange to me. I’m a lapsed/non practicing Methodist. I can’t imagine have a christening for my baby with no church affiliation. It just seems like a gift grab/give us attention type thing then.

Lapsed Catholic here, I did not baptize my child because I do not belong to a Parish and I am not interested in belonging to a Parish. But that was my choice. My older brother baptized all their kids even though they never stepped foot in Church. They knew it was important to both sets of Grandparents and were comfortable baptizing the kids.

Different people have different ties to religious ceremonies that are also culturally important. I'll let folks make decisions based on what is important to them.

Well this seems super hypocritical to me. You want all the fun, attention and warm-fuzzies, without dealing with any of that boring, tedious faith part. How convenient!