When is a better time to get pregnant?

[Anonymous]

You won’t know how hard your baby will be until he/she is here, but for the most part, even non sleep trained babies only wake up once by 5-6 months... the worst is really the first 12 weeks. You will be tired OP, but most people can function at work... if money is not an issue, you can also consider a night nanny a few days a week... it’s not the end of the world. I would have more problems being pregnant with a very physically demanding job

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What's the actual field OP?
I'm an NP married to a doctor and could help you more if you were more specific.

Tell us OP.

A veterinarian? Biomedical fellow working long hours in the lab?

If you give us specifics OP we can give you much better advice and BTDT suggestions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why so vague on what you do?

Med school and doctor oath significantly different than NP/PA path.

yes, one can be 12 months long. one can be 12 years long depending on residency.
why are you so vague?
NP and MD training are like night and day in terms of length and difficulty.

+1. It also makes a big difference in terms of things like how you plan financially and whether DH becomes a default parent.

[Anonymous]

Pros and cons both ways. Don’t overcomplicate this. You will have to tone down your methodological ideology once you’re a mom anyway. So just start now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am in training to be in the medical field (think doctor, PA, NP type job) and I have the option of either being pregnant while studying for a major exam I need to take (so I will be off my feet) but then I'd have a newborn + pumping while working long hours after completing this exam OR waiting to get pregnant (so not pregnant during this exam) and being on my feet for 12 or so hours a day (working 80+ hours) while pregnant (but no newborn to take care of). I can see the pros and cons of both but I haven't been pregnant or had a newborn so I'm not sure which would be a better bet. We can afford daycare and husband has a very flexible job.

Everyone's experiences of pregnancy and birth are so different. However, if that were me I might choose to do the pregnancy during the exam prep. 1st & 3rd trimester can be pretty tiring in their own ways, and I wouldn't want to risk something from not drinking, eating, resting, etc. enough.

Regardless, it sounds like you'll be working with the newborn in either case, right? so this is also about your health. Pregnancy can do a number on your body. I had two healthy textbook pregnancies and I can't say I would have been able to work 80+ hours on my feet doing physical stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here- again this is how little I know about babies but our plan would be for me to take off 8-12 weeks (one pro of doing it earlier and in school is better maternity leave actually then in residency) and for husband to also take 8 weeks. By 16-20 weeks would baby be sleeping most of the night or should we plan for no sleep the first year at all. I agree with those saying not to wait- it stinks that I decided so late on this career path as I am stuck with having to have a child at times that are all non-ideal but I can't really wait.

Oh, and better maternity leave in school? That really seals the deal.

Re: baby sleep, these are good overviews:
https://www.babysleepscience.com/single-post/2014/09/03/Newborns-and-Sleep-%E2%80%93-The-First-Six-Weeks
https://www.babysleepscience.com/single-post/2017/07/18/Newborns-and-Sleep-Part-2-Weeks-7-16

A great science based site in general.

Infant sleep isn't linear. If your baby eats really well, they might be getting eight hour stretches with one wake up as early as 7-8 weeks. I suggest eliminating dairy, eggs, and maybe even wheat until 4 months if you plan to breastfeed and there are any food allergies in your family. 6-8 weeks of age can be a colicky time if something in your milk doesn't agree. I went through that with my first and had to eliminate dairy and wheat. With my second I eliminated that from the beginning and there were no issues, our baby hardly ever cried.

Usually around 4 months there is the 4 month sleep regression. Their sleep "improves" up until that point, then their sleep architecture changes permanently and they begin waking on a newborn schedule again. Months 4-5 can be tough but most parents power through and then sleep train. I think doctors agree that months 5-7 are a fairly good time to begin allowing a baby to learn to self-soothe. If you do that and all goes well, you'll have solid 12 hour chunks of sleep until the next sleep regression . . . 8-10 months. That one sucks. And many people retrain at that point.

Hope this helps!

[Anonymous]

you are certainly old enough to start now, and you will figure things out as you go. these things cannot be planned so precisely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP did you get pregnant brain at all? Do you think you could have taken a major exam?

Let me put it this way... I just defended my PhD dissertation and I am 34 weeks pregnant.
I have never had “pregnancy brain”. I do think tht having a new born and studying is harder than working

Same. I had no problem with graduate classes and working part time while pregnant. Graduate thesis, working part time, plus newborn was too much.

[Anonymous]

I’m a Med student sorry thought I had cleared that up with residency part. Decided on this path late (tho it’s more common now due to how hard it is to get in). Started med school at 29 and plan on doing potentially a fellowship so that brings be to almost 40 so fertility cannot wait. I know this is not ideal but luckily husbands job is really flexible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m a Med student sorry thought I had cleared that up with residency part. Decided on this path late (tho it’s more common now due to how hard it is to get in). Started med school at 29 and plan on doing potentially a fellowship so that brings be to almost 40 so fertility cannot wait. I know this is not ideal but luckily husbands job is really flexible.

What is your residency in?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a Med student sorry thought I had cleared that up with residency part. Decided on this path late (tho it’s more common now due to how hard it is to get in). Started med school at 29 and plan on doing potentially a fellowship so that brings be to almost 40 so fertility cannot wait. I know this is not ideal but luckily husbands job is really flexible.

What is your residency in?

Havent decided yet still in med school but most trainings are 3-7 years. At my institution work hours for residents are about 80 hours a week, sometimes more with about 6 weeks maternity leave. So it won’t get better I love this career choice so no regrets just wish I had done it earlier.

[Anonymous]

Not to digress, but keep in mind the cost of childcare. I'm guessing it's just DH's income and your medical school debt right now.
Are you ready to add in baby expenses and childcare?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not to digress, but keep in mind the cost of childcare. I'm guessing it's just DH's income and your medical school debt right now.
Are you ready to add in baby expenses and childcare?

Actually no worries on this front thankfully !

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a Med student sorry thought I had cleared that up with residency part. Decided on this path late (tho it’s more common now due to how hard it is to get in). Started med school at 29 and plan on doing potentially a fellowship so that brings be to almost 40 so fertility cannot wait. I know this is not ideal but luckily husbands job is really flexible.

What is your residency in?

Havent decided yet still in med school but most trainings are 3-7 years. At my institution work hours for residents are about 80 hours a week, sometimes more with about 6 weeks maternity leave. So it won’t get better I love this career choice so no regrets just wish I had done it earlier.

I don’t think you can be pregnant and work 80 hours a week... it’s unheThy at best and possibly dangerous

[Anonymous]

Hi - midwife here!

I would do my best to avoid 80+ hour weeks working while preg, especially the surgical rotations. I have seen too many residents suffer preterm labor in those conditions, even rupture of membranes during a long surgical assist.

Pregnancy brain fog is not too bad, and plus - sorry to br cynical - but it is better to do poorly on an exam than to kill a patient, right?

So I would try to fit as much of preg into med school as I can. Best wishes!