DCUM SN community, I need your advice!

[Anonymous]

When kids start testing low average, they lose the MERLD diagnosis even though there are areas where its clear the MERLD is still there. OP, kids can look very different at 3-4 to 8-9-10+. Mine did so be very careful about getting placed in a class that is going to track him for the rest of his life. My child was severe at that age but now does fine no IEP, good grades (could use an IEP but school will not provide any supports so we gave up), very good test scores and struggles a bit but overall has learned to compensate. Its not all gloom and doom for all kids. Not all kids also have other SN. It really varies but we found the schools treat all kids - language, ASD, LD and ADHD the same and don not distinguish as well as they should.

To this poster - can you clarify a bit more? my child was dx with merld at age 3/4 but as he got older, developed more and more problems. He was then dx with ADHD, general LD and now, at age 12, autism and intellectual disability. He's so far behind in reading, math, etc. But reading your post makes me wonder if he just wasn't given the right environment (and also if I'm not too late in helping him) and that once he was "labeled" and went down one tract, he's now set down this path.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

When kids start testing low average, they lose the MERLD diagnosis even though there are areas where its clear the MERLD is still there. OP, kids can look very different at 3-4 to 8-9-10+. Mine did so be very careful about getting placed in a class that is going to track him for the rest of his life. My child was severe at that age but now does fine no IEP, good grades (could use an IEP but school will not provide any supports so we gave up), very good test scores and struggles a bit but overall has learned to compensate. Its not all gloom and doom for all kids. Not all kids also have other SN. It really varies but we found the schools treat all kids - language, ASD, LD and ADHD the same and don not distinguish as well as they should.

To this poster - can you clarify a bit more? my child was dx with merld at age 3/4 but as he got older, developed more and more problems. He was then dx with ADHD, general LD and now, at age 12, autism and intellectual disability. He's so far behind in reading, math, etc. But reading your post makes me wonder if he just wasn't given the right environment (and also if I'm not too late in helping him) and that once he was "labeled" and went down one tract, he's now set down this path.

Those issues are separate from MERLD. Many of our kids aren't getting good diagnosis early on because things look so similar at 3-4 and don't tease out till later. Its impossible to say your child was or was not in the right environment but I do think the right school environment is really important and that will be different for each of our kids depending on their needs. We had the opposite experience as you. My child as he got older, the issues and concerns teased out and many resolved itself and he didn't have any of the other concerns people post here such as LD's and ADHD. He did struggle early on with things like handwriting but we really pushed it at home (along with some OT for holding the pencil). He still struggles a bit with language but he's learning to compensate (which we have been told he'd do).

To me, if your child is so far behind, I'd worry is he in the right environment and can you supplement with tutoring if he's happy at that school and if not switch him? If it is an intellectual disability, that's an entirely different situation than a MERLD kid and it sounds like your child was misdiagnosed at the start. My child doesn't have LD and has a good IQ and we've been told by several professionals that that makes a difference. My big issue with current schools, especially MCPS, is the curriculum 2.0. I don't even see how kids with LD, especially those who struggle with memorization, reading and writing can be successful given what they teach and how they "teach" it. We pretty much figured out for early on the small class sizes, more attention, traditional teaching with the foundation work - vocabulary, spelling, grammar was very helpful with the language development. Up till recently we have heavily supplemented with workbooks (not enough time this year with activities and homework). But, our approach and our child's needs sound very different from yours. Given your child is older, talk to them about their school experience and see what they think could help. I am a bit bias though and I don't think our publics do a good job at working with special needs. Everyone encouraged us to try it and I wish I had found another private than went public. I'd switch my child but he prefers to stay and I have no good reason to force it as he's doing well academically. We seen so many great kids failing as they aren't getting the support in school/learned from our friends experiences and we are very careful to watch it, supplement and are prepared to pull our child back into private at any signs of concern.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:See a developmental pediatrician if you haven’t already, op.

Guys: why can’t you please strike the constant autism and see a dev ped poster? Do you see that parents who know anything about SN have to get past her posts? Thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:See a developmental pediatrician if you haven’t already, op.

Guys: why can’t you please strike the constant autism and see a dev ped poster? Do you see that parents who know anything about SN have to get past her posts? Thanks.

Just ignore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just posted about my 8 year old who once was diagnosed with MERLD and now is diagnosed with ADHD and a LD. My child does also have dyspraxia, incidentally.

The constant language versus autism battle that you people start up on EVERY THREAD has really got to stop. We are all sick of it!

NP. Also parent to a child initially diagnosed with MERLD and later diagnosed with ADHD and LDs (dysgraphia but also likely "stealth dyslexia" never diagnosed due to high IQ compensation) as well as slow processing speed and executive dysfunction, dyspraxia and phonological disorder and a lisp and extremely (bottom 1% in social/pragmatic communication scores). DC clearly has language processing problems. Probably also still qualifies for MERLD. Despite the plethora of poor language and social communication scores, absolutely is not autistic.

The problem with poor early language is that it makes it VERY difficult to figure out what is really going on. Is it just language or is it something else or something in addition? Sometimes it takes time for the problems to clarify. Meanwhile, I would try to avoid restrictive environments unless clearly necessary.

BTW, it is illegal for a school to place you in a self-contained classroom because nothing is available in a less restrictive environment. Schools have a legal obligation to place kids in the "least restrictive environment." (called "LRE"). "Space is not available" is not a legally acceptable defense to not placing a child in an LRE. There are many lawsuits every year by parents challenging what the LRE is.

The determination that the IEP team MUST use is 1) what does the child need and 2) how can we provide that?

It is not "what do we have available".

If the team decides that what DC needs is only available in a self-contained classroom, then that is a different issue. But, you can still challenge that.

See if you can get the team on the record agreeing with you that the inclusive classroom would be appropriate, but denying you on the basis of space availability. If you can do that, you can challenge the team's decision in a number of ways (not all of which include hiring a lawyer and filing suit).

Ways to document this are -- if somebody in the process said something to you about the inclusive classroom, email back and "check-in" restate whatever they said/you said that seems to indicate that the inclusive classroom would be appropriate but that there's no space available, inquire again if anything has changed in terms of space. Or, inform the team you will be taping at the IEP meeting. Most counties allow this and it's easy to do on a smartphone or tablet.

Again, placing in the LRE is mandatory, unless the parents consent to something else, or unless the school can show that the LRE is not "appropriate" because it will not provide the "special instruction" necessary to advance the child's skill level.

Just curious how autism was ruled out, when your child had language delays "bottom 1%" social/pragmatic communication & dyspraxia? Was it just the lack of repetitive behaviors, and where did you go for the autism assessment?

I was wondering the same. How did they test the social pragmatics?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

When kids start testing low average, they lose the MERLD diagnosis even though there are areas where its clear the MERLD is still there. OP, kids can look very different at 3-4 to 8-9-10+. Mine did so be very careful about getting placed in a class that is going to track him for the rest of his life. My child was severe at that age but now does fine no IEP, good grades (could use an IEP but school will not provide any supports so we gave up), very good test scores and struggles a bit but overall has learned to compensate. Its not all gloom and doom for all kids. Not all kids also have other SN. It really varies but we found the schools treat all kids - language, ASD, LD and ADHD the same and don not distinguish as well as they should.

To this poster - can you clarify a bit more? my child was dx with merld at age 3/4 but as he got older, developed more and more problems. He was then dx with ADHD, general LD and now, at age 12, autism and intellectual disability. He's so far behind in reading, math, etc. But reading your post makes me wonder if he just wasn't given the right environment (and also if I'm not too late in helping him) and that once he was "labeled" and went down one tract, he's now set down this path.

Those issues are separate from MERLD. Many of our kids aren't getting good diagnosis early on because things look so similar at 3-4 and don't tease out till later. Its impossible to say your child was or was not in the right environment but I do think the right school environment is really important and that will be different for each of our kids depending on their needs. We had the opposite experience as you. My child as he got older, the issues and concerns teased out and many resolved itself and he didn't have any of the other concerns people post here such as LD's and ADHD. He did struggle early on with things like handwriting but we really pushed it at home (along with some OT for holding the pencil). He still struggles a bit with language but he's learning to compensate (which we have been told he'd do).

To me, if your child is so far behind, I'd worry is he in the right environment and can you supplement with tutoring if he's happy at that school and if not switch him? If it is an intellectual disability, that's an entirely different situation than a MERLD kid and it sounds like your child was misdiagnosed at the start. My child doesn't have LD and has a good IQ and we've been told by several professionals that that makes a difference. My big issue with current schools, especially MCPS, is the curriculum 2.0. I don't even see how kids with LD, especially those who struggle with memorization, reading and writing can be successful given what they teach and how they "teach" it. We pretty much figured out for early on the small class sizes, more attention, traditional teaching with the foundation work - vocabulary, spelling, grammar was very helpful with the language development. Up till recently we have heavily supplemented with workbooks (not enough time this year with activities and homework). But, our approach and our child's needs sound very different from yours. Given your child is older, talk to them about their school experience and see what they think could help. I am a bit bias though and I don't think our publics do a good job at working with special needs. Everyone encouraged us to try it and I wish I had found another private than went public. I'd switch my child but he prefers to stay and I have no good reason to force it as he's doing well academically. We seen so many great kids failing as they aren't getting the support in school/learned from our friends experiences and we are very careful to watch it, supplement and are prepared to pull our child back into private at any signs of concern.

Thank you so much for your well thought out response. I don't want to hijack the OP's post, but did want to say you talking the time to respond had been really helpful.