Best use of money to make life / parenting easier?

[Anonymous]

We have enough money to outsource anything we want.

The BEST use is laundry service. We set bags out on the porch one day and get fresh bags of folded clothing/towels/sheets another day.

I’m not too impressed with the various food and grocery deliveries so that’s something I wouldn’t prioritize.

We also have had older au pairs who can help keep track of household management garbage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We can’t afford most the suggestions here (or choose to spend money elsewhere) and just have two kids, but we find hiring our high school neighbor is great a weekend or two a month for a few hours. She plays with the girls, or does dishes, or folds and puts away laundry, or organizes their room, packs up off season clothes etc.

She’s friendly, hard working, the girls adore her, and she costs a lot less than a nanny. Now and then (it’s been over two years) I hire a professional organizer to help declutter and institute new organizational systems.

Tell me more about a professional organizer. How much does it cost? Do you have to take time off work to work with them? How long does it take?

[Anonymous]

To the poster who said 5:30-7:30 is family time to be protected, I totally agree! I’m trying to figure out how to reduce the number of things we have to get done during that time — getting kids home / cooking dinner / table setting primarily — so we have more time to relax and enjoy each other. I appreciate all the suggestions!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Instead of weekly house cleaning, could you swing for housekeeping help 20 hrs a week (4hrs M-F)?
The house keeper could:
1. Clean the house on a weekly schedule - linens/bedrooms on Monday, Bathrooms on Tuesday, Kitchen on Wednesday, etc.
2. Tidy toys and sweep floors daily
3. Do dishes, unload dishwasher
4. Do laundry
5. Sign for grocery delivery
6. Basic meal prep, chop veggies, put a casserole in the oven, have a snack ready when you get home with kids
7. Do some food prep for other meals - clean and chop fruit for example.

I haven’t done this yet. When my kids switch from daycare to before/after care in 2 years it’s our plan. I’ve budgeted $1500-2000 a month. $1200 will come from the cost difference between daycare and school aftercare. $350 comes from giving up our bi-monthly cleaners.

I think the key thing is to meal plan and have a cleaning schedule. If she does snacks or breakfast, put that on a rotation. Try to make 95% of the clothes your family wears “machine wash cold, tumble dry low”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We can’t afford most the suggestions here (or choose to spend money elsewhere) and just have two kids, but we find hiring our high school neighbor is great a weekend or two a month for a few hours. She plays with the girls, or does dishes, or folds and puts away laundry, or organizes their room, packs up off season clothes etc.

She’s friendly, hard working, the girls adore her, and she costs a lot less than a nanny. Now and then (it’s been over two years) I hire a professional organizer to help declutter and institute new organizational systems.

Tell me more about a professional organizer. How much does it cost? Do you have to take time off work to work with them? How long does it take?

I first used one in 2015 - Jackie Kelley out of Bethesda. They have a minimum requirement (I think hers was 3 hrs?) and she was amazing! I looked at the bags of stuff I was getting rid off and my new-found bedroom floor at 3 hrs and asked if she had an afternoon client. She didn’t so we did 7-8 hrs together. I’m a fed so I can flex (ie work extra) and then get a Friday off so I think I worked with her on a Friday but I’m not sure. Soon after my DH got relocated and an organizer was part of the relocation package. We worked on our garage and that was okay but I was more emotionally attached to the items and angry about moving. After our move a few months later I hired an organizer to help finish unpacking, organize my closet, and institute organizational systems in the girls’ room. (She also arrived with a binder full of the names of area babysitters she’d recommend!). Of the three I liked Jackie best and don’t think it’s coincidental that she’s the one where I called a few, discussed my needs, and pre-screened them over the phone. Each has been on in the $85-100/ hr range (at least at the time I worked with them) and each worked with me for at least 5 hrs. I think some had a discount if you went over a certain number of hours. For some that price includes some organizational systems (bins etc) and for others I don’t think it does.

[Anonymous]

Pp here:

http://www.clearinghousenow.com/meet-jackie/

I have told my parents and DH the only gifts I ever want are photographs of our family and help with decluttering.

We tend to get really out of control with the clutter so how much peace of mind you get from help (and how much it’s worth paying) depends on that I assume. The more recent organizer I used says she regularly goes to clients houses and organizes / institutes systems when they’re not there. But I think you’d have to be there to help with any initial purging.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do you take pressure off the 5:30-7:30 window. As a fellow 2 working parent household that time frame is literally our only family time each day. Cook dinner, talk to your kids, enjoy being together. That chunk of time is the last place you want to outsource or bring other people into.

That is exactly why it is important to take the pressure off of it, though. I dread that time because it is so incredibly stressful--have to pick up one kid by 5:30 and pray the bus isn't late, race to the other school to get second kid before 6, race home to get dinner started so that we can eat no later than 7, get everyone to eat enough and still be finished by 7:30, then go straight into bedtime routines with the goal of kids being in bed by 8. It's family time, yes, but it's not exactly quality. And then there are the nights with sports practice or what-have-you where we don't even get home till 7 and have to start the mad dash then.

OP, the main thing we have done--which does help--is meal kits and grocery delivery. I used to grocery shop Monday nights after school pickup and that was always rough with two tired kids. It's well worth the added cost for us. If I had more money to throw at that window, I'd also have someone pick up the 6 pm kid so that I could just get the preschooler and come home, and the elementary school kid would be arriving home at the same time. That would save us a lot of chaos/stress (and have the added benefit of letting the elementary kid leave aftercare half an hour earlier). Generally, I'd just think about logistics and how you can make them easier. Dropoffs are not as painful for us since we each drop off one kid (not possible in evenings because DH can't leave work early enough) but I can see that being hugely helpful for some families too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m in Boston, so I can’t help you, but I am self employed as a home manager. I work for 6 different families and come anywhere between 1-3x/week doing all laundry, meal prep (cutting up fruit and veggies for kids lunches, marinating chicken or throwing something in the crockpot), organizing projects (tossing old stuff from the fridge, straightening up the pantry etc), and any local errands (grocery store, prescriptions, dry cleaning).
I do charge on the higher end ($25-30/hour) but I pay a buttload in taxes, have no PTO or sick time, no benefits etc, and have to deal with cancellations and scheduling issues, so I have to charge at the higher end.

My point is - we exist! And I think it’s something you’re looking for.

My stepmom used to do this for $20/hr in a lower COL area. I would love to hire this kind of help if we could afford it.

[Anonymous]

mother's helpers on the weekend:

find a couple of 10-13 year old neighborhood girls and ask their parents if they can come play with the older kids while you have the baby. Pay them a decent amount to be sure they will want to come back. Just have them come for an hour or hour and a half in the morning of after naps on Saturday or Sunday. Have several come and see who plays well with your kids.

They aren't babysitting. They are basically being "older sisters" for the little kids and just playing games with them. Some will be able to play with both kids and some only with one at a time. Just see what works. Pay them well! $5 an hour is great money for a 10 or 11 year old!

Your kids will be happy playing with the older girls and you and your husband can have some free time on the weekend to take care of yourself or do household chores.

This is an investment. The girls might not be so useful right away but once they develop a connection with your kids, will be worth their weight in gold. Also, in a few years, they will be the right age for proper babysitting!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We can’t afford most the suggestions here (or choose to spend money elsewhere) and just have two kids, but we find hiring our high school neighbor is great a weekend or two a month for a few hours. She plays with the girls, or does dishes, or folds and puts away laundry, or organizes their room, packs up off season clothes etc.

She’s friendly, hard working, the girls adore her, and she costs a lot less than a nanny. Now and then (it’s been over two years) I hire a professional organizer to help declutter and institute new organizational systems.

Tell me more about a professional organizer. How much does it cost? Do you have to take time off work to work with them? How long does it take?

I worked with Clutter Busters and LOVED them. They had a minimum of 4 hours I think and it was like $400. I did need to take time off work which was great because my home was empty of husband and children.

https://clutterbusters.com

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To the poster who said 5:30-7:30 is family time to be protected, I totally agree! I’m trying to figure out how to reduce the number of things we have to get done during that time — getting kids home / cooking dinner / table setting primarily — so we have more time to relax and enjoy each other. I appreciate all the suggestions!

I’m a nanny for 2 WOH parents and twin 1.5yr olds. Before mom & dad come home at 6, babies are fed, bathed, in their jammies and I’ve already prepared dinner for the parents and it’s in the fridge. That 6-730 time period is sacred and I move heaven and earth daily to make sure that nothing interrupts my nanny family’s time together. I’m in the home all day- I have the time while the babies are napping to streamline their lives. So I do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have enough money to outsource anything we want.

The BEST use is laundry service. We set bags out on the porch one day and get fresh bags of folded clothing/towels/sheets another day.

I’m not too impressed with the various food and grocery deliveries so that’s something I wouldn’t prioritize.

We also have had older au pairs who can help keep track of household management garbage.

If money is not an issue why not hire a professional/more experienced nanny rather than an au pair?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have enough money to outsource anything we want.

The BEST use is laundry service. We set bags out on the porch one day and get fresh bags of folded clothing/towels/sheets another day.

I’m not too impressed with the various food and grocery deliveries so that’s something I wouldn’t prioritize.

We also have had older au pairs who can help keep track of household management garbage.

If money is not an issue why not hire a professional/more experienced nanny rather than an au pair?

1) want a live in person
2) kids in school with big gap in the middle of the day
3) unpredictable evening schedule that doesn’t work well for a real adult professional with her own life.

[Anonymous]

Even for a ten year old, it is really inconsiderate to only pay them $5/Hour to play w/the kids.

Start at least at $8-9/Hour.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you take pressure off the 5:30-7:30 window. As a fellow 2 working parent household that time frame is literally our only family time each day. Cook dinner, talk to your kids, enjoy being together. That chunk of time is the last place you want to outsource or bring other people into.

That is exactly why it is important to take the pressure off of it, though. I dread that time because it is so incredibly stressful--have to pick up one kid by 5:30 and pray the bus isn't late, race to the other school to get second kid before 6, race home to get dinner started so that we can eat no later than 7, get everyone to eat enough and still be finished by 7:30, then go straight into bedtime routines with the goal of kids being in bed by 8. It's family time, yes, but it's not exactly quality. And then there are the nights with sports practice or what-have-you where we don't even get home till 7 and have to start the mad dash then.

OP, the main thing we have done--which does help--is meal kits and grocery delivery. I used to grocery shop Monday nights after school pickup and that was always rough with two tired kids. It's well worth the added cost for us. If I had more money to throw at that window, I'd also have someone pick up the 6 pm kid so that I could just get the preschooler and come home, and the elementary school kid would be arriving home at the same time. That would save us a lot of chaos/stress (and have the added benefit of letting the elementary kid leave aftercare half an hour earlier). Generally, I'd just think about logistics and how you can make them easier. Dropoffs are not as painful for us since we each drop off one kid (not possible in evenings because DH can't leave work early enough) but I can see that being hugely helpful for some families too.

You don’t need a housekeeper. You need someone to help with picking up your kids