Do your teens walk home from school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:the OP has the right to be concern. As the old saying "when your neighbor loses his job, it is a recession. When you lose your job, it is a depression." Crime statistics is meaningless if it happens to your child.

Is it safer if your child walk home from school in the Mclean area versus Falls Church? Not necessarily. Pedophiles live in both Mclean and Falls Church, just saying.

Yes, your child can walk home in a group of at least 4 kids that live within one block from your home. Otherwise, the answer is NO.

The kid is 14, not 4. You're not doing your child any favors by trying to constantly bubble proof the world they live in, and not allowing them to develop the confidence to walk 10 minutes without a parent or grandparent.

I think that it is actually prudent to know which kids are walking home on your street. If you have several other kids walking home around the same time that your kid is or you know that there are neighbors home, there is a certain safety in that even if your kid is technically walking alone.

Stranger abductions might be rare. But things like having a car follow you or a weirdo flashing you happen - especially when you're walking alone and it is scary when it happens.

But then you learn you can cope with "scary". Do you think they will never be confronted with anything scary? Talk through things that might happen, how to handle it. You don't help people grow up into capable adults by shielding them from never, ever potentially running into anything that might possibly not be roses and sunshine.

This happened to me twice as a kid. First in ES when there was a "flasher" around our school. And he flashed a couple of us girls. We giggled. Then as a teen my mother had hired a handyman, once he came to our door when I was alone, I opened it, he said he was there to get a check from my mother. As I explained she wasn't home, he pulled all of his glory out of the zipper of his pants for me to see. I immediately closed the door and he left.

I'm still standing.

I'm actually a little worried that my kids haven't experienced anything like this. Not that I want my teens see a handyman's bits, but they really haven't experienced a tiny fraction of what I did coming of age in the early 80's. They've had immediate access to mom or dad by cell phone, where I used to call and get a busy signal and had to cool my heels wherever I was. They haven't taken public transportation by themselves, where I used to hop on metro buses and meet up with friends at the mall. They haven't had to figure out a whole lot beyond school and sports.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:the OP has the right to be concern. As the old saying "when your neighbor loses his job, it is a recession. When you lose your job, it is a depression." Crime statistics is meaningless if it happens to your child.

Is it safer if your child walk home from school in the Mclean area versus Falls Church? Not necessarily. Pedophiles live in both Mclean and Falls Church, just saying.

Yes, your child can walk home in a group of at least 4 kids that live within one block from your home. Otherwise, the answer is NO.

The kid is 14, not 4. You're not doing your child any favors by trying to constantly bubble proof the world they live in, and not allowing them to develop the confidence to walk 10 minutes without a parent or grandparent.

I think that it is actually prudent to know which kids are walking home on your street. If you have several other kids walking home around the same time that your kid is or you know that there are neighbors home, there is a certain safety in that even if your kid is technically walking alone.

Stranger abductions might be rare. But things like having a car follow you or a weirdo flashing you happen - especially when you're walking alone and it is scary when it happens.

But then you learn you can cope with "scary". Do you think they will never be confronted with anything scary? Talk through things that might happen, how to handle it. You don't help people grow up into capable adults by shielding them from never, ever potentially running into anything that might possibly not be roses and sunshine.

Actually, I think you can go your whole life w/o ever being followed by a stranger or chased by a guy with his dick in his hand. I don't think that I needed those experiences to grow up to be a capable adult. As a teen, I walked my familiar route home every day, usually with a friend or two but even when I walked by myself there were lots of other kids walking home at the same time. It was good exercise and for the most part a good lesson in autonomy and personal responsibility. Out of the years that I walked home I had maybe 4 or 5 scary stranger danger experiences where someone was actively following me, trying to talk to me or...yes, even chasing me. What I learned from those experiences is "Don't be a straggler". The creeps are looking for stragglers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:the OP has the right to be concern. As the old saying "when your neighbor loses his job, it is a recession. When you lose your job, it is a depression." Crime statistics is meaningless if it happens to your child.

Is it safer if your child walk home from school in the Mclean area versus Falls Church? Not necessarily. Pedophiles live in both Mclean and Falls Church, just saying.

Yes, your child can walk home in a group of at least 4 kids that live within one block from your home. Otherwise, the answer is NO.

The kid is 14, not 4. You're not doing your child any favors by trying to constantly bubble proof the world they live in, and not allowing them to develop the confidence to walk 10 minutes without a parent or grandparent.

I think that it is actually prudent to know which kids are walking home on your street. If you have several other kids walking home around the same time that your kid is or you know that there are neighbors home, there is a certain safety in that even if your kid is technically walking alone.

Stranger abductions might be rare. But things like having a car follow you or a weirdo flashing you happen - especially when you're walking alone and it is scary when it happens.

But then you learn you can cope with "scary". Do you think they will never be confronted with anything scary? Talk through things that might happen, how to handle it. You don't help people grow up into capable adults by shielding them from never, ever potentially running into anything that might possibly not be roses and sunshine.

This happened to me twice as a kid. First in ES when there was a "flasher" around our school. And he flashed a couple of us girls. We giggled. Then as a teen my mother had hired a handyman, once he came to our door when I was alone, I opened it, he said he was there to get a check from my mother. As I explained she wasn't home, he pulled all of his glory out of the zipper of his pants for me to see. I immediately closed the door and he left.

I'm still standing.

I'm actually a little worried that my kids haven't experienced anything like this. Not that I want my teens see a handyman's bits, but they really haven't experienced a tiny fraction of what I did coming of age in the early 80's. They've had immediate access to mom or dad by cell phone, where I used to call and get a busy signal and had to cool my heels wherever I was. They haven't taken public transportation by themselves, where I used to hop on metro buses and meet up with friends at the mall. They haven't had to figure out a whole lot beyond school and sports.

This sort of thing happened to me, too. And I have allowed my own boys to walk together to the neighborhood park to shoot baskets. I've allowed them to ride their bikes around the neighborhoods we've lived in - to/from swim practice, school, friends' houses, the park, the store, the bus stop. Certainly as teens they don't need to be actively supervised by a more responsible person 24/7. They are capable of looking out for themselves.

[Anonymous]

OP, I think you are being overly cautious. My middle schooler gets himself back and forth to school from our home in SE, DC to school in Georgetown. It takes a combination of walking, train (with a transfer) and a bus.

[Anonymous]

Mine live within the 1 mile boundary from the school and are required to walk. I think their trip is 0.9 of a mile. Even when one has to stay late and the other walks home, I don't worry. They always text when they're home.

[Anonymous]

My neighbors and I discuss this a lot and have similar concerns. My rule for my 12 yo is that she only walks when there are friends to walk with. If no one is walking her way, she is to call us for a ride. I understand this is a luxury since I am at home, but I put it out there for a reference point-- I make sure she is not walking alone if at all possible.

I worry more about people knowing the pattern that she is walking home every day. Someone can expect her at a given corner on a particular day. When I'm not at home, I also worry about someone jumping out right when she is entering the house (and entering with her).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:the OP has the right to be concern. As the old saying "when your neighbor loses his job, it is a recession. When you lose your job, it is a depression." Crime statistics is meaningless if it happens to your child.

Is it safer if your child walk home from school in the Mclean area versus Falls Church? Not necessarily. Pedophiles live in both Mclean and Falls Church, just saying.

Yes, your child can walk home in a group of at least 4 kids that live within one block from your home. Otherwise, the answer is NO.

The kid is 14, not 4. You're not doing your child any favors by trying to constantly bubble proof the world they live in, and not allowing them to develop the confidence to walk 10 minutes without a parent or grandparent.

I think that it is actually prudent to know which kids are walking home on your street. If you have several other kids walking home around the same time that your kid is or you know that there are neighbors home, there is a certain safety in that even if your kid is technically walking alone.

Stranger abductions might be rare. But things like having a car follow you or a weirdo flashing you happen - especially when you're walking alone and it is scary when it happens.

But then you learn you can cope with "scary". Do you think they will never be confronted with anything scary? Talk through things that might happen, how to handle it. You don't help people grow up into capable adults by shielding them from never, ever potentially running into anything that might possibly not be roses and sunshine.

Actually, I think you can go your whole life w/o ever being followed by a stranger or chased by a guy with his dick in his hand. I don't think that I needed those experiences to grow up to be a capable adult. As a teen, I walked my familiar route home every day, usually with a friend or two but even when I walked by myself there were lots of other kids walking home at the same time. It was good exercise and for the most part a good lesson in autonomy and personal responsibility. Out of the years that I walked home I had maybe 4 or 5 scary stranger danger experiences where someone was actively following me, trying to talk to me or...yes, even chasing me. What I learned from those experiences is "Don't be a straggler". The creeps are looking for stragglers.

Yes, why are some parents so certain that the world is full of creeps just waiting for their kids to be briefly unsupervised. I walked to/from elementary and then to/from middle and high school bus stops, walked and biked alone all over my suburb and never got followed or saw some guy's dick. I hope my DS and DD never do either but I'm not going to let the fear that it *could* happen keep them from a normal, healthy level of independence for a teenager.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My neighbors and I discuss this a lot and have similar concerns. My rule for my 12 yo is that she only walks when there are friends to walk with. If no one is walking her way, she is to call us for a ride. I understand this is a luxury since I am at home, but I put it out there for a reference point-- I make sure she is not walking alone if at all possible.

I worry more about people knowing the pattern that she is walking home every day. Someone can expect her at a given corner on a particular day. When I'm not at home, I also worry about someone jumping out right when she is entering the house (and entering with her).

Make sure that there are no shrubs/trees by your front door that someone could use to hide behind and be familiar with which neighbors are home during the day. If something creepy happens to her on the way home she can go to the neighbor's house and call you. Get to know your neighbors if you haven't already.

And, yes, definitely have her *call* you when she gets home and have a code word or phrase that she can use if something is wrong - "I brought the mail in" or whatever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:the OP has the right to be concern. As the old saying "when your neighbor loses his job, it is a recession. When you lose your job, it is a depression." Crime statistics is meaningless if it happens to your child.

Is it safer if your child walk home from school in the Mclean area versus Falls Church? Not necessarily. Pedophiles live in both Mclean and Falls Church, just saying.

Yes, your child can walk home in a group of at least 4 kids that live within one block from your home. Otherwise, the answer is NO.

The kid is 14, not 4. You're not doing your child any favors by trying to constantly bubble proof the world they live in, and not allowing them to develop the confidence to walk 10 minutes without a parent or grandparent.

I think that it is actually prudent to know which kids are walking home on your street. If you have several other kids walking home around the same time that your kid is or you know that there are neighbors home, there is a certain safety in that even if your kid is technically walking alone.

Stranger abductions might be rare. But things like having a car follow you or a weirdo flashing you happen - especially when you're walking alone and it is scary when it happens.

But then you learn you can cope with "scary". Do you think they will never be confronted with anything scary? Talk through things that might happen, how to handle it. You don't help people grow up into capable adults by shielding them from never, ever potentially running into anything that might possibly not be roses and sunshine.

Actually, I think you can go your whole life w/o ever being followed by a stranger or chased by a guy with his dick in his hand. I don't think that I needed those experiences to grow up to be a capable adult. As a teen, I walked my familiar route home every day, usually with a friend or two but even when I walked by myself there were lots of other kids walking home at the same time. It was good exercise and for the most part a good lesson in autonomy and personal responsibility. Out of the years that I walked home I had maybe 4 or 5 scary stranger danger experiences where someone was actively following me, trying to talk to me or...yes, even chasing me. What I learned from those experiences is "Don't be a straggler". The creeps are looking for stragglers.

Yes, why are some parents so certain that the world is full of creeps just waiting for their kids to be briefly unsupervised. I walked to/from elementary and then to/from middle and high school bus stops, walked and biked alone all over my suburb and never got followed or saw some guy's dick. I hope my DS and DD never do either but I'm not going to let the fear that it *could* happen keep them from a normal, healthy level of independence for a teenager.

I guess I've had some bad luck because I not only got chased by a weirdo as a teenager on the walk home from school but I also got chased by a creep when I was 20 something on a fairly high travel trail. I can not tell you how terrifying being chased by a predator is - both while it's happening and after you escape. It literally took me years to be able to be able to exercise on that path again even though nothing had actually physically happened to me.

I think part of it was because I was pretty and didn't weigh too much. I looked vulnerable and easy to take down even though I felt strong, healthy and quite capable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let me guess - your parents watch Fox news...

No, they are watching the Democrats during the Kavanaugh confirmation, and realize that even normal looking people are crazy these days.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:the OP has the right to be concern. As the old saying "when your neighbor loses his job, it is a recession. When you lose your job, it is a depression." Crime statistics is meaningless if it happens to your child.

Is it safer if your child walk home from school in the Mclean area versus Falls Church? Not necessarily. Pedophiles live in both Mclean and Falls Church, just saying.

Yes, your child can walk home in a group of at least 4 kids that live within one block from your home. Otherwise, the answer is NO.

So, just to play along with this lunacy for a minute, what makes a group of three unsafe, and a group of four acceptable?

4 is not enough either! It must be at least 5 kids who live within one block from the home.

Or, alternatively, kids have to have an opportunity to navigate the world on their own, and solve problems on their own, before they leave home. And I agree with the PP that in some ways, the omnipresence of cell phones inhibits this. If you get stuck now, you can always use your cell phone to call your parent, and your parent will always be available on their cell phone, to help you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:the OP has the right to be concern. As the old saying "when your neighbor loses his job, it is a recession. When you lose your job, it is a depression." Crime statistics is meaningless if it happens to your child.

Is it safer if your child walk home from school in the Mclean area versus Falls Church? Not necessarily. Pedophiles live in both Mclean and Falls Church, just saying.

Yes, your child can walk home in a group of at least 4 kids that live within one block from your home. Otherwise, the answer is NO.

So, just to play along with this lunacy for a minute, what makes a group of three unsafe, and a group of four acceptable?

4 is not enough either! It must be at least 5 kids who live within one block from the home.

Or, alternatively, kids have to have an opportunity to navigate the world on their own, and solve problems on their own, before they leave home. And I agree with the PP that in some ways, the omnipresence of cell phones inhibits this. If you get stuck now, you can always use your cell phone to call your parent, and your parent will always be available on their cell phone, to help you.

Mollie Tibbets had her cellphone and it didn't help her. Women have been attacked while walking and talking on their cellphone. When someone starts to chase you - you run. You don't stop to call your parents. Cell phones can give a false sense of security.

You need to be aware of your surroundings, you need to know what to do if a creeper approaches you.

[Anonymous]

Glad to see the vast majority of responses agree this is silly. My 11 year old walks and takes public transport alone through downtown DC.

Yes, there are places where it's dangerous for kids to walk home even short distances, as explained in this article - but these parents don't have the option of paying for a car service: https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/education/when-a-dc-school-closed-for-renovations-parents-faced-a-troubling-choice/2017/07/04/88c94334-5773-11e7-ba90-f5875b7d1876_story.html?utm_term=.6f10afa64da8

"Many parents say they don’t want to send their kids to the temporary location, Adelaide Davis Elementary School. They don’t have anything against Davis. But they don’t want to travel through an area with which their neighborhood, known as “37th,” has had a long, often bitter and occasionally deadly rivalry.

The parents are scared for their children — and for themselves. Simple City is nearby, but it’s a destination they’ve always been careful to avoid. Likewise, residents of Simple City steer clear of 37th and other areas with ongoing turf battles. Navigating perceived no-go zones is part of the daily routine for many residents in the poorest parts of the District.

Violence, guns, safety,” Walker says, listing the reasons. “All of the concerns are about safety. They just don’t feel safe going into that community.”

[Anonymous]

There are different dangers out there. Would I let my kid walk home through a sketchy area known for shootings and other violence? No. I wouldn't walk through an area like that, either. Another example of where having a cellphone with you is going to do you no good.

[Anonymous]

My 11 year old walks a mile each way to school in DC.