Ex suddendly requesting 50/50 custody

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If most dads were completely honest, they do 50/50 to try to avoid child support.

If most moms were completely honest, they ask for more custody to try and get more child support.

Yep, kids cost so little that thanks to child support I am able to take lavish vacations, spa days, and more botox than Donatella.

[Anonymous]

OP, obviously he is just using this as a negotiating tool. I wonder what would happen if you delay the court date as long as possible, and meanwhile let him have your child 50% of the time. I bet he gets tired of it very quickly. Ask your lawyer.

[Anonymous]

It is likely child support driven. I had a similar situation, not 50/50 but enough overnights that it would change the calculation of child support. I told him he needed to demonstrate he could even do that schedule before agreeing to it in writing. He did and it is the schedule we have now. I did not want to be in a situation where my children wanted more time and I was the reason they didn’t have it. It was bumpy at first because I made him be accountable for things at his house (having clothes, lunch items, etc). If they were going to spend that kind of time then he needed to ensure it was like true joint custody.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can notify the state department not to issue a passport to your child unless both parents consent. They put a note in their system about this. It's to prevent children being taken back to one parent's home country.

I thought both parents had to be physically present (or get notarized consent from absent parent) to even get a passport?

Negative; depends who has the full legal custody of a child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If most dads were completely honest, they do 50/50 to try to avoid child support.

If most moms were completely honest, they ask for more custody to try and get more child support.

This is not true. You need to look at the roles the parents played during the marriage, because those roles are likely to continue after divorce. During the marriage, I purchased the children's clothing, registered for activities, bought school supplies, etc. and now that we are divorced this has continued. More child support is necessary for the parent who is handling these expenses, whether it's the mom or the dad. In my situation, my ex refuses to contribute for any additional expenses beyond the child support payment, which is why child support amounts end up being such a battle between ex spouses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can notify the state department not to issue a passport to your child unless both parents consent. They put a note in their system about this. It's to prevent children being taken back to one parent's home country.

I thought both parents had to be physically present (or get notarized consent from absent parent) to even get a passport?

Negative; depends who has the full legal custody of a child.

What about in cases of joint legal custody?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If most dads were completely honest, they do 50/50 to try to avoid child support.

If most moms were completely honest, they ask for more custody to try and get more child support.

This is not true. You need to look at the roles the parents played during the marriage, because those roles are likely to continue after divorce. During the marriage, I purchased the children's clothing, registered for activities, bought school supplies, etc. and now that we are divorced this has continued. More child support is necessary for the parent who is handling these expenses, whether it's the mom or the dad. In my situation, my ex refuses to contribute for any additional expenses beyond the child support payment, which is why child support amounts end up being such a battle between ex spouses.

And in this case, dad has seen his child regularly 2-3 times a week and now that things are being formalized, he wants 50/50 custody. Nothing about that sounds like someone just out to not pay child support. He has been actively involved in his child's life and wants to be sure that legally he can continue to do so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If most dads were completely honest, they do 50/50 to try to avoid child support.

If most moms were completely honest, they ask for more custody to try and get more child support.

This is not true. You need to look at the roles the parents played during the marriage, because those roles are likely to continue after divorce. During the marriage, I purchased the children's clothing, registered for activities, bought school supplies, etc. and now that we are divorced this has continued. More child support is necessary for the parent who is handling these expenses, whether it's the mom or the dad. In my situation, my ex refuses to contribute for any additional expenses beyond the child support payment, which is why child support amounts end up being such a battle between ex spouses.

The whole purpose of the child support your ex is paying IS to cover the things you mentioned. Why is he a bad guy for paying what the court ordered and not the arbitrary amount you’ve decided you are “owed”? This attitude kills me.