"Redshirting" a Late Summer Birthday and Private PK/K Recommendations

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ugh, as someone whose 4 year old is in a preK class full of kids who are *already* turning 6, I say send your kids to school on time.

You're going to have a rough time in life.

Uh, no. PP is simply sending her kid to school ON TIME as it's supposed to happen. These other people are being a bit selfish, in my opinion, in redshirting their kids. Seriously, someone has to be the oldest and the youngest in the class. It's not the end of the world. I get it if your kid has serious delays or medical issues, but outside of that, get over it. Why is it more fair that your kid will now be 6 for all of kindergarten when there are kids who are literally just turning 5 a day or two before the year starts, vs. your kid being 5 like all the other kids in the class but not turning 6 until most of them have already turned 6? I have a summer birthday and never thought twice about this. Being around older kids can push you to do better. It just seems terribly selfish and unfair to set up a scenario where your kid is going to be a year older and thus possibly better able to compete for sports positions and scholarships, etc. Think about all of the kids whose families are low-income and can't afford to send their kids to private pre-K or "junior K" (whatever the heck that is!) and probably have less a chance to compete for these things in the first place due to circumstances beyond their control. It just makes me angry. End of rant.

Why should my Kid be the youngest when I can legally send her in K when she will turn 6 3 days before school starts (Aug 27th birthday)? She was born at 39 weeks, if she were born at 40 she would have to start at 6 as well. Sorry.. deal with it... I think it’s totally fair.

Because someone's kid has to be the youngest. I guess I just feel like the regulations are there for a purpose, and it's bending the rules to not follow them. What about the kid who was born on Aug 27 but whose family can't afford to send him to an extra year of preschool or daycare and needs to start public K? Yes, the cut-offs are arbitrary, but if you push it back to Aug 27 because you don't want your kid to be the youngest, then why won't the next parent want to push it back to Aug 15 because her kid shouldn't be the youngest, and then another parent to July 25, and so on.

I understand your point, but I doubt any parent would do what you are suggesting. If they truly think it is in the interest of their child, they will redshirt. Just a curiosity, but what’s your kid’s birthday?

Really? Some people honestly can't afford another year of childcare or preschool. Some people don't speak English fluently or have access to knowledge about the educational system and have no concept that they even could/should consider "redshirting" -- they see the cut-off date for enrollment and follow the rules accordingly. My child's birthday is in June, and he's very small for his age. We could afford private school and considered doing private for a year before putting him into public, but the plan was always to be in-grade -- that he would go to a private, nature-based kindergarten program and then enter in 1st grade. I'm not saying this is right for every child or that there aren't circumstances when you would want to "redshirt," but just that it's not feasible for everyone and is setting up a bit of an unnecessary divide. I have good friends whose kid has a late August birthday, and they are thrilled to have one less year of preschool to pay for.

I agree with this. My first grader has two good friends (boys) who turned 6 in August, after K had ended. Both are doing awesome. Unless there are severe special needs, redshirting doesn't do your kid any favors.

What you wrote and what PP wrote are not the same thing. PP thinks we should not redshirt summer birthday kids because it will have a negative impact on other kids in the same classroom. You instead are just arguing that redshirting may not be in the best interest of the redshirted kids... Very different perspective

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ugh, as someone whose 4 year old is in a preK class full of kids who are *already* turning 6, I say send your kids to school on time.

You're going to have a rough time in life.

Uh, no. PP is simply sending her kid to school ON TIME as it's supposed to happen. These other people are being a bit selfish, in my opinion, in redshirting their kids. Seriously, someone has to be the oldest and the youngest in the class. It's not the end of the world. I get it if your kid has serious delays or medical issues, but outside of that, get over it. Why is it more fair that your kid will now be 6 for all of kindergarten when there are kids who are literally just turning 5 a day or two before the year starts, vs. your kid being 5 like all the other kids in the class but not turning 6 until most of them have already turned 6? I have a summer birthday and never thought twice about this. Being around older kids can push you to do better. It just seems terribly selfish and unfair to set up a scenario where your kid is going to be a year older and thus possibly better able to compete for sports positions and scholarships, etc. Think about all of the kids whose families are low-income and can't afford to send their kids to private pre-K or "junior K" (whatever the heck that is!) and probably have less a chance to compete for these things in the first place due to circumstances beyond their control. It just makes me angry. End of rant.

Why should my Kid be the youngest when I can legally send her in K when she will turn 6 3 days before school starts (Aug 27th birthday)? She was born at 39 weeks, if she were born at 40 she would have to start at 6 as well. Sorry.. deal with it... I think it’s totally fair.

Because someone's kid has to be the youngest. I guess I just feel like the regulations are there for a purpose, and it's bending the rules to not follow them. What about the kid who was born on Aug 27 but whose family can't afford to send him to an extra year of preschool or daycare and needs to start public K? Yes, the cut-offs are arbitrary, but if you push it back to Aug 27 because you don't want your kid to be the youngest, then why won't the next parent want to push it back to Aug 15 because her kid shouldn't be the youngest, and then another parent to July 25, and so on.

I understand your point, but I doubt any parent would do what you are suggesting. If they truly think it is in the interest of their child, they will redshirt. Just a curiosity, but what’s your kid’s birthday?

Really? Some people honestly can't afford another year of childcare or preschool. Some people don't speak English fluently or have access to knowledge about the educational system and have no concept that they even could/should consider "redshirting" -- they see the cut-off date for enrollment and follow the rules accordingly. My child's birthday is in June, and he's very small for his age. We could afford private school and considered doing private for a year before putting him into public, but the plan was always to be in-grade -- that he would go to a private, nature-based kindergarten program and then enter in 1st grade. I'm not saying this is right for every child or that there aren't circumstances when you would want to "redshirt," but just that it's not feasible for everyone and is setting up a bit of an unnecessary divide. I have good friends whose kid has a late August birthday, and they are thrilled to have one less year of preschool to pay for.

I agree with this. My first grader has two good friends (boys) who turned 6 in August, after K had ended. Both are doing awesome. Unless there are severe special needs, redshirting doesn't do your kid any favors.

What you wrote and what PP wrote are not the same thing. PP thinks we should not redshirt summer birthday kids because it will have a negative impact on other kids in the same classroom. You instead are just arguing that redshirting may not be in the best interest of the redshirted kids... Very different perspective

I'm the PP who said it has a negative impact on other kids in the class. I stand by that. I don't think it's right for every kid born in August to start school "on time" with his/her class, but it may not be right for every kid born in December to start school "on time," and those kids are rarely "red-shirted." If there's an extenuating circumstance and your kid needs to start later, fine. But this is so common that we even have a term for it (red-shirting), so it's clearly happening more than once in a great while.

I don't expect people to negatively impact their kids, but I do expect people to think about what they do for their kids and how it impacts others. And I really think it does impact others. When your kid can sit still better than a younger kid, that impacts the way the other kid is looked at in the class. When your kid applies to college at the same time as a kid a year younger, that impacts the chances of this other kid getting into college -- or getting a sports scholarship, etc.

There's a book called "Dream Hoarders," and it makes some interesting points about the upper middle class "hoarding" opportunities, and I think this is a prime example of it. Here's a link to the book: https://www.amazon.com/Dream-Hoarders-American-Leaving-Everyone/dp/081572912X

[Anonymous]

Then you should take it up to the ministry of education or the DC school council (or board of Ed). As long as the rules allow it, I will look at my child’s wellbeing before yours. If I think my daughter will benefit being the older for whatever reason, I will redshirt her. My personal reasons are not to gain an academic or sport advantage, but it’s because she is not the most confident girl out there and older (or same age girls) always dominate her. My DD always wants to fit in and will do anything (even being the doormat of some stronger and more dominant girls) to play with other girls. She is often sad and alone because other girls tell her they have to think about whether she can play with them.
When I see this it hurts me and if she is the oldest, other girls may look up to her like younger girls sometimes do at the playground. My DD is tall, but not very strong or fast. Her English is also not on par with the other girls.
From an academic standpoint my daughter is ready to start K I think, but it’s her emotional development that I am worried about

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Then you should take it up to the ministry of education or the DC school council (or board of Ed). As long as the rules allow it, I will look at my child’s wellbeing before yours. If I think my daughter will benefit being the older for whatever reason, I will redshirt her. My personal reasons are not to gain an academic or sport advantage, but it’s because she is not the most confident girl out there and older (or same age girls) always dominate her. My DD always wants to fit in and will do anything (even being the doormat of some stronger and more dominant girls) to play with other girls. She is often sad and alone because other girls tell her they have to think about whether she can play with them.
When I see this it hurts me and if she is the oldest, other girls may look up to her like younger girls sometimes do at the playground. My DD is tall, but not very strong or fast. Her English is also not on par with the other girls.
From an academic standpoint my daughter is ready to start K I think, but it’s her emotional development that I am worried about

I hear you, and I'm honestly not trying to criticize you directly. I just think that it is the responsibility of people to think about others. I also hear exactly what you're saying "it's emotional development, not academic" from literally every person who wants to red-shirt. In addition to having a kid with a June bday, I also have a kid with a March bday who is more in the middle of the class in terms of bday. But he is small for his age and shy, and not the most mature. I don't think the idea of emotional development not always being ready for kindergarten is exclusive to summer bdays. Anyway, I don't mean to criticize you -- just trying to point out something to consider.

[Anonymous]

Giving this a bump for 2024.

We sent our son with an end of July birthday “on time” to Kindergarten at our local public school. He did well and we decided to switch to private after K for a number of reasons (had no principal, lackluster front office/admin staff, limited supervision at recess, several friends transferred, etc.), and I’m now seeing the big picture that he will be one of the youngest all throughout his schooling. We seriously considered repeating K in his new school given the switch, but his teacher said he was reading and progressing well/that he would be bored in another year of K. He is bright, athletic, and social, which I don’t take for granted and know all kids advance at their own pace, but I’m noticing many of his friends are in K and learned almost half of the kids currently in K are actually his same age (or older!).

The redshirting trend seems to be the exception vs. the rule in private schools here and I just didn’t realize this until after we made our decision to keep him moving along to 1st grade. I know I should be grateful he’s doing well and just hope it won’t hurt his maturity or emotional growth over time given the older age of his direct peers. Will he forever feel behind or resent us for not putting him in the same age bracket as his classmates? Would anyone advise repeating 1st or is it too late at this point? He has said he doesn’t want to do this. His current teacher in 1st also says he is doing well and doesn’t advise repeating.

Would love to hear how this has panned out for anyone in a similar situation who pushed ahead vs. those who gave the gift of time. I also get that pandemic schooling may have heavily influenced many out there. Anyway, I appreciate the differing perspectives here and just need some reassurance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ugh, as someone whose 4 year old is in a preK class full of kids who are *already* turning 6, I say send your kids to school on time.

You're going to have a rough time in life.

Uh, no. PP is simply sending her kid to school ON TIME as it's supposed to happen. These other people are being a bit selfish, in my opinion, in redshirting their kids. Seriously, someone has to be the oldest and the youngest in the class. It's not the end of the world. I get it if your kid has serious delays or medical issues, but outside of that, get over it. Why is it more fair that your kid will now be 6 for all of kindergarten when there are kids who are literally just turning 5 a day or two before the year starts, vs. your kid being 5 like all the other kids in the class but not turning 6 until most of them have already turned 6? I have a summer birthday and never thought twice about this. Being around older kids can push you to do better. It just seems terribly selfish and unfair to set up a scenario where your kid is going to be a year older and thus possibly better able to compete for sports positions and scholarships, etc. Think about all of the kids whose families are low-income and can't afford to send their kids to private pre-K or "junior K" (whatever the heck that is!) and probably have less a chance to compete for these things in the first place due to circumstances beyond their control. It just makes me angry. End of rant.

Why should my Kid be the youngest when I can legally send her in K when she will turn 6 3 days before school starts (Aug 27th birthday)? She was born at 39 weeks, if she were born at 40 she would have to start at 6 as well. Sorry.. deal with it... I think it’s totally fair.

Because someone's kid has to be the youngest. I guess I just feel like the regulations are there for a purpose, and it's bending the rules to not follow them. What about the kid who was born on Aug 27 but whose family can't afford to send him to an extra year of preschool or daycare and needs to start public K? Yes, the cut-offs are arbitrary, but if you push it back to Aug 27 because you don't want your kid to be the youngest, then why won't the next parent want to push it back to Aug 15 because her kid shouldn't be the youngest, and then another parent to July 25, and so on.

I understand your point, but I doubt any parent would do what you are suggesting. If they truly think it is in the interest of their child, they will redshirt. Just a curiosity, but what’s your kid’s birthday?

Really? Some people honestly can't afford another year of childcare or preschool. Some people don't speak English fluently or have access to knowledge about the educational system and have no concept that they even could/should consider "redshirting" -- they see the cut-off date for enrollment and follow the rules accordingly. My child's birthday is in June, and he's very small for his age. We could afford private school and considered doing private for a year before putting him into public, but the plan was always to be in-grade -- that he would go to a private, nature-based kindergarten program and then enter in 1st grade. I'm not saying this is right for every child or that there aren't circumstances when you would want to "redshirt," but just that it's not feasible for everyone and is setting up a bit of an unnecessary divide. I have good friends whose kid has a late August birthday, and they are thrilled to have one less year of preschool to pay for.

I agree with this. My first grader has two good friends (boys) who turned 6 in August, after K had ended. Both are doing awesome. Unless there are severe special needs, redshirting doesn't do your kid any favors.

What you wrote and what PP wrote are not the same thing. PP thinks we should not redshirt summer birthday kids because it will have a negative impact on other kids in the same classroom. You instead are just arguing that redshirting may not be in the best interest of the redshirted kids... Very different perspective

I'm the PP who said it has a negative impact on other kids in the class. I stand by that. I don't think it's right for every kid born in August to start school "on time" with his/her class, but it may not be right for every kid born in December to start school "on time," and those kids are rarely "red-shirted." If there's an extenuating circumstance and your kid needs to start later, fine. But this is so common that we even have a term for it (red-shirting), so it's clearly happening more than once in a great while.

I don't expect people to negatively impact their kids, but I do expect people to think about what they do for their kids and how it impacts others. And I really think it does impact others. When your kid can sit still better than a younger kid, that impacts the way the other kid is looked at in the class. When your kid applies to college at the same time as a kid a year younger, that impacts the chances of this other kid getting into college -- or getting a sports scholarship, etc.

There's a book called "Dream Hoarders," and it makes some interesting points about the upper middle class "hoarding" opportunities, and I think this is a prime example of it. Here's a link to the book: https://www.amazon.com/Dream-Hoarders-American-Leaving-Everyone/dp/081572912X

Too bad. Nobody is going to hamstring their kid to help yours. Hop on over to the college forum to see how this plays out.

[Anonymous]

do private K at a preschool that has a K class. After the private K class at the preschool, all kids will be moving on, some will be doing K again at a different school, some will move on to 1st grade at a different school. So since everyone is moving on to different school and doing their thing being redshirted does not alarm the kid. Also, doing private K will give you the choice to consider what to do after that. You can think one more year about redshirting or not, get feedback from teachers at private K and watch how your kid is doing.