Two Kids in Daycare/School and So Many Expenses...Best Ways to Manage?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^
It isn't much less expensive for us. We were paying close to $1,500 a month, now we are around $1,000 a month between aftercare and sister summer camps. Then again clothes cost more, we aren't including other activity costs or general other increases.

I don't think people should plan on a dramatic drop in expenses.

Exactly. Expenses just shift.

Not sure how you're paying 1,000 a month for aftercare. Aftercare in DC isn't more than $500 a month. Summer is three months.

NP here but I guess it depends on how much summer camp costs -- I've seen $300-$500 a week. So, say 12 weeks for the summer, plus 4 weeks for school holidays at the high end is $6000. So, $6000 for the year for aftercare + $6000 for camps averages out to $1000/month.

This, one summer camp with aftercare and a discount is about 2k for four weeks. I still have 7 more weeks to plan. And I spent money on some
additional enrichment classes. Some of this is optional, but I was surprised at how much we are still spending for a kindergartener.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone that I've spoken to about this has basically said you suck it up for the two years that you have two kids in daycare and it gets so much better once the older one starts K. So...that's what we're doing.

Except we are still paying $500 a month for aftercare and now have to pay for summer camps. So you don't save as much as you think you might.

That's still less than the $1200/month X 12 months I'm paying for preschool!

You have toddlers. Everything get more expensive as they get older. Sure aftercare is $500/mo. You have then summer and all the breaks, teacher work days, snow days and such. Your kids going to do sports? Need tutoring? Need new clothes (not the dame price as toddler clothes!)? Eat big portions? You banning them from technology? Everywhere you go younwill now be paying adult prices for them.

I have older kids and just stopped the AuPair program. I'm absolutely choking on the cost of summer camp for 2 kids.my 10yr old is now in adult clothes. Dont even get me started on that.

[Anonymous]

Without more info I'd say your mortgage is too high.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone that I've spoken to about this has basically said you suck it up for the two years that you have two kids in daycare and it gets so much better once the older one starts K. So...that's what we're doing.

Except we are still paying $500 a month for aftercare and now have to pay for summer camps. So you don't save as much as you think you might.

That's still less than the $1200/month X 12 months I'm paying for preschool!

You have toddlers. Everything get more expensive as they get older. Sure aftercare is $500/mo. You have then summer and all the breaks, teacher work days, snow days and such. Your kids going to do sports? Need tutoring? Need new clothes (not the dame price as toddler clothes!)? Eat big portions? You banning them from technology? Everywhere you go younwill now be paying adult prices for them.

I have older kids and just stopped the AuPair program. I'm absolutely choking on the cost of summer camp for 2 kids.my 10yr old is now in adult clothes. Dont even get me started on that.

I agree with you mostly but these costs didn't immediately appear at Kindergarten. I think that's important to point out for those with preschool aged kids.
I have a third grader and the sports costs have increased, as well as the need for braces, but when in K he only did a couple of county activities and soccer that didn't cost as much as what I'm spending now. In other words, costs will drop noticeably when the child enters K even with before/aftercare, but will steadily increase with the need for more food, bigger clothes, sports clinics, braces, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone that I've spoken to about this has basically said you suck it up for the two years that you have two kids in daycare and it gets so much better once the older one starts K. So...that's what we're doing.

Except we are still paying $500 a month for aftercare and now have to pay for summer camps. So you don't save as much as you think you might.

That's still less than the $1200/month X 12 months I'm paying for preschool!

You have toddlers. Everything get more expensive as they get older. Sure aftercare is $500/mo. You have then summer and all the breaks, teacher work days, snow days and such. Your kids going to do sports? Need tutoring? Need new clothes (not the dame price as toddler clothes!)? Eat big portions? You banning them from technology? Everywhere you go younwill now be paying adult prices for them.

I have older kids and just stopped the AuPair program. I'm absolutely choking on the cost of summer camp for 2 kids.my 10yr old is now in adult clothes. Dont even get me started on that.

I agree with you mostly but these costs didn't immediately appear at Kindergarten. I think that's important to point out for those with preschool aged kids.
I have a third grader and the sports costs have increased, as well as the need for braces, but when in K he only did a couple of county activities and soccer that didn't cost as much as what I'm spending now. In other words, costs will drop noticeably when the child enters K even with before/aftercare, but will steadily increase with the need for more food, bigger clothes, sports clinics, braces, etc.

NP here. This is helpful to hear. We are running a deficit with both kids in child care, so are really looking forward to the older one starting pre-K. We just backed off one parent's retirement contributions (he was basically maxing out to catch up) so we hopefully don't have to dip into savings as often. We're trying to be frugal and responsible, but are not agonizing over it because it's not forever and we'd drive ourselves crazy. We also haven't taken a vacation in years and we're overdue, so we're treating ourselves this year. Two young kids is hard!

[Anonymous]

Two in daycare is tough. We just started. One change we made was cutting cable. Internet is $60, we already had Prime and Netflix and we purchased an antenna for network channels. Saving close to $100/month. We've cut back on dinners out & take out. My husband is now packing lunch 4 days a week, saving at least $40/week! I've always packed. Most of our other expenses are pretty fixed, no car payments. I only get my hair cut 2-3x a year so can't really cut back anymore on that! So far we are managing. Both our kids have late birthdays too so an extra year of care.

[Anonymous]

I kind of disagree with everyone who says that costs don't really go down as kids get older. I have a toddler and a teenager and three is no way I am spending the same amount of money on the teen as I am on the toddler right now. The toddler is far more expensive...

As they get older it's true that clothing costs somewhat increased, but they are not really that much more that than when DC was a toddler. I spend about $300-$400 on the toddler/year for clothes, and probably $700-$900 on the teenager. Both have enough clothing to get by 2-3 weeks for the summer. Granted, it's mostly Target, Old Navy, consignment, Carters, and TJ Maxx, but unless you care about labels, you don't need to outlay a lot. Shoe's for a teenage can be pricey, but I tell DC that I will only spend X-dollars on X-number of shoes 2x/year, and anything he wants above that amount, he has to pay for with his own money. That way I control some of our costs too. And he's usually content to spend within my limit, or just $20-30 above when I tell him I plan to spend.

Our food costs actually seem more expensive b/c of the toddler, not the teen. For the teen, he usually just eats anything my husband and I eat or will snack on. But the toddler, the toddler requires Vitamin D milk we wouldn't normally keep in the house, lots of different toddler-friendly food we wouldn't normally have (chicken nuggets, fish nuggets, graham crackers, cheerios, etc). And of course, let's not forget the diapers and wipes you have to spend monthly on a toddler- that's easily another $40/month.

Activity costs can add up as kids age, but really, but really, those are totally discretionary. When my older DC was younger, he was completely happy with 1-2 activities per week, and they were usually programs through the local parks and rec or YMCA. When he was older, he did spend a few years doing travel programs for a couple different sports - including one sport with a lot of expensive gear- and even that outlay, combined with what I spend on average for him for clothing, food, and summer camps, was no where near what I spend yearly just on our toddler's daycare (just under 20K/year).

Sure, there's braces, but even that, combined with all the other normal outlays for a teenager, doesn't usually total up to the average of what one year of daycare for a toddler costs in this area. So I just don't see where people are saying costs don't really go do. They do. Even if you still end up shelling out $600-1000 or so a month for DC after the daycare years are over, that's a significant decrease from $1500-2000/month norm during the toddler years.

[Anonymous]

Opps ^^ PP. Meant to say 2-3 weeks of clothing for each season.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I kind of disagree with everyone who says that costs don't really go down as kids get older. I have a toddler and a teenager and three is no way I am spending the same amount of money on the teen as I am on the toddler right now. The toddler is far more expensive...

As they get older it's true that clothing costs somewhat increased, but they are not really that much more that than when DC was a toddler. I spend about $300-$400 on the toddler/year for clothes, and probably $700-$900 on the teenager. Both have enough clothing to get by 2-3 weeks for the summer. Granted, it's mostly Target, Old Navy, consignment, Carters, and TJ Maxx, but unless you care about labels, you don't need to outlay a lot. Shoe's for a teenage can be pricey, but I tell DC that I will only spend X-dollars on X-number of shoes 2x/year, and anything he wants above that amount, he has to pay for with his own money. That way I control some of our costs too. And he's usually content to spend within my limit, or just $20-30 above when I tell him I plan to spend.

Our food costs actually seem more expensive b/c of the toddler, not the teen. For the teen, he usually just eats anything my husband and I eat or will snack on. But the toddler, the toddler requires Vitamin D milk we wouldn't normally keep in the house, lots of different toddler-friendly food we wouldn't normally have (chicken nuggets, fish nuggets, graham crackers, cheerios, etc). And of course, let's not forget the diapers and wipes you have to spend monthly on a toddler- that's easily another $40/month.

Activity costs can add up as kids age, but really, but really, those are totally discretionary. When my older DC was younger, he was completely happy with 1-2 activities per week, and they were usually programs through the local parks and rec or YMCA. When he was older, he did spend a few years doing travel programs for a couple different sports - including one sport with a lot of expensive gear- and even that outlay, combined with what I spend on average for him for clothing, food, and summer camps, was no where near what I spend yearly just on our toddler's daycare (just under 20K/year).

Sure, there's braces, but even that, combined with all the other normal outlays for a teenager, doesn't usually total up to the average of what one year of daycare for a toddler costs in this area. So I just don't see where people are saying costs don't really go do. They do. Even if you still end up shelling out $600-1000 or so a month for DC after the daycare years are over, that's a significant decrease from $1500-2000/month norm during the toddler years.

Agree, absolutely. I have a teen and tween and would be hard-pressed to spend the $1500/month I was spending on each one when they were little. Even with braces, college savings, and slightly more expensive clothes, there's a lot left over.

[Anonymous]

We're there too. #2 goes to K in 2018, #3 goes in 2020. As a lobbyist, I watch the next two elections with other deadlines in mind...

One thing that's been helpful for #3, who is still in in-home which is less expensive, I break the bill up into two paychecks. So it's $558 every 2 weeks, rather than all at once. I'm better able to cash flow that.

On the more expensive pre-school, which is $1,483. My wife and I are sending about $750 every two weeks into another account that her preschool takes the payment from.

It is strangling and it's impacted how much we can set aside for college, but the above will hopefully solve itself when they stop preschool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I kind of disagree with everyone who says that costs don't really go down as kids get older. I have a toddler and a teenager and three is no way I am spending the same amount of money on the teen as I am on the toddler right now. The toddler is far more expensive...

As they get older it's true that clothing costs somewhat increased, but they are not really that much more that than when DC was a toddler. I spend about $300-$400 on the toddler/year for clothes, and probably $700-$900 on the teenager. Both have enough clothing to get by 2-3 weeks for the summer. Granted, it's mostly Target, Old Navy, consignment, Carters, and TJ Maxx, but unless you care about labels, you don't need to outlay a lot. Shoe's for a teenage can be pricey, but I tell DC that I will only spend X-dollars on X-number of shoes 2x/year, and anything he wants above that amount, he has to pay for with his own money. That way I control some of our costs too. And he's usually content to spend within my limit, or just $20-30 above when I tell him I plan to spend.

Our food costs actually seem more expensive b/c of the toddler, not the teen. For the teen, he usually just eats anything my husband and I eat or will snack on. But the toddler, the toddler requires Vitamin D milk we wouldn't normally keep in the house, lots of different toddler-friendly food we wouldn't normally have (chicken nuggets, fish nuggets, graham crackers, cheerios, etc). And of course, let's not forget the diapers and wipes you have to spend monthly on a toddler- that's easily another $40/month.

Activity costs can add up as kids age, but really, but really, those are totally discretionary. When my older DC was younger, he was completely happy with 1-2 activities per week, and they were usually programs through the local parks and rec or YMCA. When he was older, he did spend a few years doing travel programs for a couple different sports - including one sport with a lot of expensive gear- and even that outlay, combined with what I spend on average for him for clothing, food, and summer camps, was no where near what I spend yearly just on our toddler's daycare (just under 20K/year).

Sure, there's braces, but even that, combined with all the other normal outlays for a teenager, doesn't usually total up to the average of what one year of daycare for a toddler costs in this area. So I just don't see where people are saying costs don't really go do. They do. Even if you still end up shelling out $600-1000 or so a month for DC after the daycare years are over, that's a significant decrease from $1500-2000/month norm during the toddler years.

Agree, absolutely. I have a teen and tween and would be hard-pressed to spend the $1500/month I was spending on each one when they were little. Even with braces, college savings, and slightly more expensive clothes, there's a lot left over.

+1.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Everyone that I've spoken to about this has basically said you suck it up for the two years that you have two kids in daycare and it gets so much better once the older one starts K. So...that's what we're doing.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hire a live in nanny or an au pair. It will cost you about $2000 a month, including the food.
The au pair can take your 3.5 year old to playdates or you can do a part time church preschool which will cost about $300 a month.

Good luck!

+1 This. We were really uncomfortable having someone else in our home at first. But it's so great for the convenience and we made the basement into the au pair's space with a tiny kitchenette. If I have to go in early for a meeting or want to go out on a date night on the weekend and haven't reached 45 hours for the au pair yet- I've got a babysitter already!

[Anonymous]

We have an Au Pair. I take public transportation to work so we don't need to get an extra car.

[Anonymous]

You gut it out. We have no life and work a lot anyway, so now is the time to spend all of our money on good child care.

My oldest DC couldn't handle restaurants so we dropped those expenses easily. We don't take any vacations since as we have no family support, vacations would be incredibly expensive.

No cleaner, no babysitter, no frills. Clothes from target or consignment (kids are still little). But we have a nice house and decent cars.

We'll be out of this nightmare in two years but from what I hear, older kid expenses are NO JOKE. So there's no winning, basically.