If employee e-mails you after being let go, should you e-mail back to send best wishes?

[Anonymous]

I think you can reply with general well wishes but I would avoid any mention of her performance at work.

[Anonymous]

I would send her my good wishes from my personal email account.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was in that position a couple of years ago. I chose not to respond. I felt really crappy about it. But I think it was the right decision.

Confused why this would be the right decision. What's wrong with you people? You're not crossing any kind of legal line by responding, you're simply showing that you're not just robots at work, you're people first and foremost. This shouldn't even be a question for someone.

Robots is what corporate America wants. Hide your emotions and smile. Replace people with h1bs Smile more

"H1bs" are people too. And, believe it or not, every topic in this forum does not need to come down to H1bs and how upset you are about them.

Don't engage the obsessed H1B poster. He/she even managed to post this nonsense on the alligator thread.

[Anonymous]

I'd respond but keep it brief and generic - "best wishes" is fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here's the problem. Larla is trying to keep ties open with those who she thinks liked her. If you respond, you may find yourself down the road getting a call or email from her asking to be a reference or write a letter of referral for her. If you would decline such a request, then do not respond.

I've seen this happen on more than one occasion (including being in your shoes). Responding politely created an awkward situation when an employee that I was friendly with, but would not recommend or give a referral to kept the door open to ask me later. I've seen it happen to coworkers as well. So, keep that in mind when you try to be polite to a terminated employee that did not report to you.

This. And wouldn't that be risky in a very subtle way?

If that happened, the person could just say "sorry, I'm not in a position/comfortable to be a reference for you."

Not a big deal.

+1. Sending a friendly reply now does not compel you in any way to write a letter later on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think you can reply with general well wishes but I would avoid any mention of her performance at work.

Why in the hell would you mention her performance? "Happy trails Linda! Sorry you were the shit at spreadsheets!"

[Anonymous]

"Hi Larla, thanks for your email. I wish you all the best in your future endeavors." If she contacts you for a reference later you can always politely decline. (I'm sorry; I'm not comfortable providing a reference since I don't feel that I was in a position to evaluate your work.) Just because you say goodbye to someone doesn't mean you are obligated to be a reference for them. Sheesh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Hi Larla, thanks for your email. I wish you all the best in your future endeavors." If she contacts you for a reference later you can always politely decline. (I'm sorry; I'm not comfortable providing a reference since I don't feel that I was in a position to evaluate your work.) Just because you say goodbye to someone doesn't mean you are obligated to be a reference for them. Sheesh.

Yes, this is perfect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a senior leader in a group of about a dozen people. I have 3 direct reports. The other senior leader has 2 direct reports, one of whom - Larla - was put on a 60-day PIP and was let go yesterday (she was allowed to resign).

Larla sent a goodbye e-mail to our group (with the exception of her senior leader and our group Director).

I am a friendly person and am tempted to write back just to wish her well; I liked her and was sorry to see her go, although I understand that she was not doing her job well.

I am the only senior person who received the e-mail.

Can I write her back (thank you and best wishes), or should I just not respond at all (which seems 'rude' under anything other than a work situation)?

Her senior leader and our group Director were not thrilled that Larla sent the e-mail to the group. So I don't think they would be pleased if I wrote back.

WWYD?

I'd write her, and just say best wishes.

[Anonymous]

You sound like such a coward OP. Of course you should write and just say you wish her well. Plain and simple. Period. You may very well be in her position someday and you'll hope that everyone in the world is not an asshole scardy cat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One of the best ways to avoid litigation is to treat people with decency and kindness whenever you can.

Employment lawyer

Why do you think so many fail at this, then?

Huge number of reasons -- people fail at common etiquette all the time is the biggest one. Second biggest one -- People get tangled up in "litigation avoidance" as meaning that they can't reach out and be human, as in here, which is preposterous. The very rules of evidence are actually structured against the notion that post-tort apologies and the like -- sending flowers to an accident victim in the hospital, for instance -- could be used as evidence of liability -- the rules of evidence explicitly state that such actions cannot be used as evidence of liability. Most people don't realize that such measures are harmless and encouraged by the law. Third, when lawyers get involved, people begin to legalize every situation and start running common sense notions through a legal filter. It saddens me that the notion of whether to reply to someone's goodbye email (Best of luck Larla! Keep in touch!) is being run through a litigation meter. That's crazy.

Thank you for weighing in with reason. I think it must be very hurtful for people who leave a job (for whatever reason) to feel like the place just smoothly closed over upon their departure as if they were never even there.

It is. I was let go/resigned in a restructuring. Still occasionally have PTSD-type thoughts over how my departure was handled. The shunning was really unnecessary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One of the best ways to avoid litigation is to treat people with decency and kindness whenever you can.

Employment lawyer

Why do you think so many fail at this, then?

Huge number of reasons -- people fail at common etiquette all the time is the biggest one. Second biggest one -- People get tangled up in "litigation avoidance" as meaning that they can't reach out and be human, as in here, which is preposterous. The very rules of evidence are actually structured against the notion that post-tort apologies and the like -- sending flowers to an accident victim in the hospital, for instance -- could be used as evidence of liability -- the rules of evidence explicitly state that such actions cannot be used as evidence of liability. Most people don't realize that such measures are harmless and encouraged by the law. Third, when lawyers get involved, people begin to legalize every situation and start running common sense notions through a legal filter. It saddens me that the notion of whether to reply to someone's goodbye email (Best of luck Larla! Keep in touch!) is being run through a litigation meter. That's crazy.

+1 Thank you for verifying my common sense in human decency.

[Anonymous]

Still occasionally have PTSD-type thoughts over how my departure was handled. The shunning was really unnecessary.

Sorry you went through this. Happened to me too. It really messes with you to lose your job and have former coworkers treat you like you have the plague. Note: contact with a fired employee will not get you fired. Have some compassion, send a nice email. This does not obligate you to do anything further.

[Anonymous]

Something seems wrong in your company. You have a senior position there but are afraid of sending a basic, polite message with good wishes to a former employee.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Still occasionally have PTSD-type thoughts over how my departure was handled. The shunning was really unnecessary.

Sorry you went through this. Happened to me too. It really messes with you to lose your job and have former coworkers treat you like you have the plague. Note: contact with a fired employee will not get you fired. Have some compassion, send a nice email. This does not obligate you to do anything further.

Me three. My team was fired for not meeting sales targets, and the next day I came in to clean out my office (I was fired over the phone after hours the night before). People in the lunch room couldn't even look me in the eye as I grabbed my mug and box of tea in the cupboard. It made a bad situation so much more demoralizing.

Do the kind thing, just wish her well in a brief message. It might help ease the pain of what she's going through.