Favoritism in the workplace

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Federal agency. Slightly attractive women get special treatment.

This is something I've heard about. I would go even further, though, and say that slightly attractive women who indulge flirting get special treatment. I know someone who was in a situation where she could've gotten special treatment. She was attractive, but she shut down the flirting, and it impacted her in a negative way. Another person didn't shut it down, and that person definitely got special treatment (as in certain male managers fell all over themselves to help her career).

This is one area that I think is tricky for women. And you would think it's just an issue for women who aren't conventionally attractive (as in they get slighted), but it's also an issue for women who are average or above average attractive but don't like a certain kind of attention from male superiors and send a clear message that it is unwelcome.

I don't really see how to change it. It's a difficult thing to prove. And most often, the attention skirts the edge of harassment. So it doesn't rise to the level of making any kind of official complaint. It's more subtle than that. At least that's the situation the person I know confronted.

I think that the sad reality is that managers -- of both sexes -- tend to treat more favorably the people who make them feel good. So even some female managers will advance and promote the people who tend to flatter them the most or make them feel liked.

I'd love to hear some positive stories about how someone effectively dealt with this sort of thing and was able to strike a balance.

No balance. The women I've seen use it to their advantage sucked up to the unattractive male managers. The male managers fast tracked the women, and the rest is history.

[Anonymous]

All I can say is karma is a bitch.

The fall from the top is hard and it hurts like hell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All I can say is karma is a bitch.

The fall from the top is hard and it hurts like hell.

You know, I keep telling myself that, but I haven't seen, in my 20 years in the workplace, too many cases where the unethical behavior was punished adequately.
Karma may be a bitch, but she has no teeth.
The only sure reward for being good is a clear conscience.

[Anonymous]

I have seen the fall...senior managers summarily fired.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All I can say is karma is a bitch.

The fall from the top is hard and it hurts like hell.

You know, I keep telling myself that, but I haven't seen, in my 20 years in the workplace, too many cases where the unethical behavior was punished adequately.
Karma may be a bitch, but she has no teeth.
The only sure reward for being good is a clear conscience.

I've seen it but I've also seen it through their kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Major brokerage firm in the 80s- the boss only talked to the men. There were no women - his quote was "honey , be thankful any of you have a job."

PW gov consulting in mid 80's. woman friend tells firm she is pregnant. woman partner tells person I don't know how you can be pregnant and work at this firm. woman friend leaves in 6 months. no negative karma. I left 2 years later. It was a sweatshop up and out.