And feel the need to spend an inordinate amount of time criticizing other people's parenting choices. What's lacking in your life that this is how you choose to spend your energy? |
Not PP but of course I judge the huge, older kid in DD's class unfavorably or sometimes with pity. Get used to it. BTW, what is lacking in your life that you needed to comment on PP's post? |
| Parents hold their kids back because they think it will give their child the advantage over the other children who are proceeding in the assigned grade. I'm actually glad it doesn't work and their kid is no better off - just 14 and in the fifth grade. |
The largest kid in my kid's first grade class also had the greatest social struggles, he happens to be the youngest. |
Wow, that kid must have been held back about 4 grades or you are really really bad at math. |
It is called hyperbole, Dear. |
And then in college she didn't use birth control and took forever to realize she was pregnant. So she still wasn't socially mature. |
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I'm the op. I really don't care either way. I don't plan on redshirting my kids when the time comes, and I really don't care what everyone else is doing. I posted because it seemed most people had heard of the short term benefits of holding kids back but not the long term effects.
I'm more perplexed by how big of a deal this has become and why people feel so strongly one way or the other and care so much about what someone is doing with their own kids. I bet you could come up with an equal number of studies supporting either side of the issue. Which to me means, the difference is negligible and not worth wringing your hands over. There are many more important issues we could be focusing on that would more clearly benefit our children. |
Poor Andrea... |
You win the internet today
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Point proven. Thank you pp. |
Awesome. You made my day. |
You contradicted yourself. The study you posted has been posted here numerous times, along with many other studies. You are just stirring the pot. |
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I "follow" the redshirting debate because my son is a fall birthday, and missed the cutoff for K by 5 days. I had him in private preschool, where he could go to K early. They were ok with me pushing him ahead a year. But I watched all of his preschool year and noted that he was not only the youngest, but smallest, and picked on. I couldn't do that to him for 4 more years until everyone evens out. So I kept him back (technically just didnt push him ahead) and he did another year of preschool and goes to K this fall. I am glad I did. He grew so much more confident being surrounded by kids his size. He is also not the oldest because of several parents "red shirting". I have no problem with their decisions to redshirt.
Oddly enough, there was a family with a little girl in the same boat - except her birthday was a few days before the cutoff. They debated holding her back and decided to keep her with the group and sent her to K. She was also very small, and socially "behind". A year later, they regret that decision and she is going to repeat K, but in public school so she wont have the stigma with friends at our private school. I really wish the debate would end. It is tiring. |
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I'm a summer birthday and thus was one of the youngest in my class. I totally agree with the notion of this article -- I've almost always been the youngest in every situation and always strove to do more as a result. I remember actually feeling a bit uncomfortable when I realized a few years ago that I was one of the oldest in my department at work (and also the most senior besides my boss, who was older than me). I remember realizing that it was one of the first times in my life when I wasn't the youngest one striving to catch up to everyone else.
I definitely feel like I pushed myself a lot because I was younger, although it was never totally a conscious choice. I didn't FEEL particularly young in comparison to my classmates, and no one ever made fun of me for being younger. It was just something I always felt internally. |