of course you can, but it us still presumptuous of a neighbor to meddle in this family's lives. I never wanted or needed to discuss my child's diagnosis or intellect with casual acquaintances. It is his story to reveal or not to reveal. Much like the circumstances of my daughter's adoption is her story to tell. Random people are not in entitled to their private information. |
I did not mean to imply that you have to share anything with anyone but equating social difficulties = a high IQ does not help kids who DO have a diagnosis because there is help for social issues. My kid with ASD/ADHD has an IEP for social issues mainly and OT. He does not need help with academics. My profoundly gifted child is much happier at school and has a large group of friends since he gets supports for his social issues. While your child may not have a diagnosis, too many parents dismiss social issues simply bc their kid is "soooo smart". That's all I meant. |
I concur with the previous poster. Talking about dinosaurs and the sciences beats constant discussion about video games. I love it when my 7 year old DS play dates that did not involve playing on the wii or being so competitive that the kids would resort to cheating to win in sport. |
Dear DCUM,
I strongly suspect my neighbor is an obnoxious busybody. She is always armchair-diagnosing people she doesn't know. Should I say something to her? |
But my first post already indicated that he had been tested and had an ADHD diagnosis. I am not sure what point you are trying to make. People are quick to make arm chair diagnosis and assume parents haven't already addressed the issue. Not everyone over shares their children's personal issues--whether giftedness, ADHD, or asd. |
I have a kid with ASD and a kid who is ADHD/profoundly gifted. Never in a million years would I have a conversation about that with one of my neighbors. It's not the neighbors' business. The process of diagnosis, treatment and accommodation has been very difficult. School IEP meetings are painful enough. I don't think it's necessary to have a neighborhood IEP meeting, too. |
I have a child with AS and I also have a neighbor that thinks that she can get my DD to change her ways of interacting with others.
People with AS are wired differently than most of the non-AS population. I recently watched a video of a bike that engineers added a set of gears to the handle bars, so that when you turned them the wheel actually went in the opposite direction. A guy decided that he was going to ride it a little every day until he learned how to ride it. It took him 8 months! Once he tried to ride a regular bike, he couldn't. He had to relearn how to ride a regular bike! This is how people with AS are. Some of the basic things that most people don't give a second thought about are very difficult to do. Everyone has their own struggles in life. Some like to project theirs onto others. Most can keep to themselves, while other cannot. That's life. |
My DS has ADHD. Highly functioning. Able to socialize in school with a small group of kids--from one of the popular kids. One of my neighbors has a boy with AS and asked me one day what kind of autism my son had. I was totally taken aback but responded politely. But looking back, I wish I had let her know how inappropriate her question was. |
Sorry for typo...should have read "far" from one of the popular kids. |
What kind of autism? That question doesn't even make sense, especially from a mom of an ASD child. |
similar thing happened to us. DS is in middle school. ADHD with expressive language challenge. Came home one day and said "MOM, DO I HAVE AUTISM...". apparently some kid at school told him he had ASD. ![]() |
what is the point of this post? You feel that you've made a diagnosis and should make this child's parent's aware? mind your own business and learn tolerance and appreciation for others' differences! |
My DS8 is like you describe-- exceptionally gifted and ADHD. I guarantee OP, that your neighbor has already heard about her DC's social challenges from a teacher. I think you are concerned, not meddling, but I am certain the parents have been made aware by teachers. |
Wow. Maybe she thought you both would have a connection and become more friendly over shared circumstances. Maybe she needs someone to talk to. Thanks for not reaming her out for her apparent faux pas. |