Would you let your teen son (14 years old) move his bedroom to the basement?

[Anonymous]

We're intentionally NOT putting a bedroom in the basement when we remodel to avoid this very scenario. I'd make that bedroom the office/guest room (especially if there's a bathroom on that level). My college single couldn't have been more than 6 x 8, and I survived that just fine. I'm sure your girls are OK. Or perhaps they could share a larger bedroom?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Greg Brady!

I thought he moved up to the attic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some of you PPs must have horrible children to have so little trust in them. You seriously think a 14 year old is going to sneak out of the house in the middle of the night because their bedroom is in the basement? What's stopping them from doing it now? What are you going to do when he's 16 and driving?

Must be hard being so paranoid.

If it makes sense for the family and the kid is in favor, I'd move his room. No brainer for me.

It's DCUM.

An OP says her 14 year old son is suddenly behaving himself and listening to her, and a bunch of people pop up asking if she (OP) has considered drugs and whether the DS has been drug tested in the past 4 days

But seriously, I'd be happy to be able to give my DS a larger basement room. Let's be honest here: whether he is living upstairs or in the basement, he probably will be chugging his first beer (and hating it, only finishing it so he doesn't look like a pussy), smoking a cigarette or two, and sneaking out before high school is over. Why do I know this? Because this is exactly what I (and probably 90% of you guys) did at his age. You have to trust that, after this rebellion, you have raised him well enough that he is able to make the right choices eventually.

Of course, if you don't trust your DS, by all means lock him in his quiet room upstairs. But that would be a pretty damn boring teenage existence.

[Anonymous]

All my guy friends in high school lived in the basement and maybe all but one wasnt a walk out. All I have to say is you can't control them forever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I should mention that it is a walk out basement. The bedroom has an egress window and large closet.

fuck no

sorry to be so crass - but again, fuck no

I was crawling out of my ground floor window at 14 to meet up with friends in the summer. harmless when I think back - but still . . .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, but I depending on the kid's trustworthiness I might install an alarm so he couldn't go outside at night without my knowledge.

+1 I'd do it if I could alarm the doors and windows for both protection and midnight escapes.

+2

[Anonymous]

We did it with our oldest. We have an alarm that chirps when the door or window was opened. Our rec room was also down there so there was a fair amount of activity. We also reserved the right to move her back upstairs at the first sign of trouble. It worked out well for everyone.

[Anonymous]

Why push him away from the family. Why is this a good thing? Something you're "trying to make happen"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some of you PPs must have horrible children to have so little trust in them. You seriously think a 14 year old is going to sneak out of the house in the middle of the night because their bedroom is in the basement? What's stopping them from doing it now? What are you going to do when he's 16 and driving?

Must be hard being so paranoid.

If it makes sense for the family and the kid is in favor, I'd move his room. No brainer for me.

Don't be naive! I was a really good kid, and my parents would have never had reason to worry about me sneaking out. But I did. All the time. My curfew was 11. My friends' curfew was 1:00. So they would drop me off at 11 and come back 30 minutes later to pick me up. It was our routine and I didn't even think anything of it.

[Anonymous]

OP let him move to the basement!

I really feel that teens need privacy. Not to get into trouble, but to just be. She needs space to cry for no reason, sing out loud, dance around, talk to herself, shower/change clothes without worrying about someone walking in, facetime with her friends, listen to music that her family or friends would laugh at.

You said that there is a living room in the basement that the entire family uses, but is not right next to the room, right? This sounds perfect. the family will still be around, but with a bit of a buffer zone.

You could let her and your younger kids know that she gets this privilege because she is a responsible kid and you feel she can handle it. When she moves out, the second oldest gets the space IF you feel they could handle the responsibility.

All that said, I don't care how sweet, trustworthy, and responsible your daughter is. She WILL sneak out if you don't put an alarm on that door!

[Anonymous]

Ours did at the start of this year - 15yr old boy. Some regs we enforce - 1. all internet auto turns off at midnight and he doesn't know the password. 2. All phones and electronics charge upstairs with us - computer and DS etc included. So far we are ok with things - he also does his homework up in kitchen just because he wants to.