My mom has seriously gone nuts:(

[Anonymous]

I had a bipolar MIL and now a bipolar exDH. I suggest you read, "I'm not Sick, I don't need help" by Xavier Amador. It discusses the problem of "anosognosia," which is the medical term for people who lack insight or awareness of their disease. It is a common problem in bipolar and schizophrenia. I think it helps to understand that it is part of the brain disorder and not a willful refusal to take meds, although that is how it may appear from the outside.

Also, Amador talks in the book about the best ways to talk to patients so they will be motivated to stay on meds. I found the whole book tremendously helpful.

I also highly recommend taking the 12 week Family to Family course through your local chapter of the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill. This is a FABULOUS course that meets once a week for a few hours. You will learn about the major mental illness, their symptoms, treatments, and there are some exercises to help you feel the subjective burden on the ill family member. The course specifically discusses the very common problem of the patient stopping meds. You will also meet other family members of the mentally ill and you will discover commonalities and even make some friends who understand better what you're going through.

Maybe you can even get your FIL to take it -- either with you or if he doesn't live near you then in his hometown. Take his interest in a positive light -- he cared enough to say something even if it might not have been the right thing. He was trying to help and be understanding. He was probably concerned that if he said nothing, your mom would perceive him (a medical doctor) as agree with her decision and just use to it to self-justify. And, the NAMI course will help him as a doctor too.

NAMI also runs support groups. There are many issues we family members have to work through and it is difficult to talk to friends, who usually don't know much about mental illness, about these problems.