Bullyism at the elementary school level

[Anonymous]

Our neighbors are AA and their two kids go to Beauvoir. Both the parents and the kids love it. I don't think your neighbor knows what she's talking about.

[Anonymous]

Your neighbor would be correct about Stone Ridge...ask a current fourth grade parent

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What on earth is Bullyism?

Beat me to it.

OP, please stop making up words. Do not embarrass yourself by actually saying this out loud. It's not a word.

It is like exmissions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We looked at Beauvoir but did not go through with the application because we thought it wasn't the right fit for our DD. That said, there seemed to be plenty of very happy looking, diverse kids. We know children of color who have attended and have never heard a word about racist children.

I also think, in general, people should be careful about throwing the word bullying around. Bullying is really a phenomenon that starts in late elementary and middle school, and is when a child is targeted by another kid or group of kids. Little kids not playing with each other day-to-day is not bullying, and IMO makes it difficult for us to deal with the real problem, which exists but is not everywhere a kid feels rejected.

Just because someone has not heard of something, it doesn't mean it's never happened. Children who are bullies can focus on any number of traits, including race. Most schools don't know how to deal with it. Most parents ignore it because they don't know how to deal with it either. It's possible that OP's neighbor either heard or experienced a discrete incident that was not repeated. Beauvoir does have some fairly conservative (read likely more racist) families. All it would take is one screwed up child who hears racist attitudes at home to spark a situation where a child of color is bullied on the basis of race.

You're absolutely wrong when you say bullying doesn't begin until the upper elementary grades. Most bullying is verbal, and it can begin as early as 4 or 5, when children begin to have enough cognitive skills to be manipulative. It can involve a child being targeted because they are different or simply because they are of a gentle temperament where they are not able to defend themselves against a concerted verbal assault. I've unfortunately witnessed two cases of it: once where the bully was an almost 5 year old and a second time with a 6 year old. In both cases, the bullying children had parents who were unable to discipline their children effectively and alternated abusve discipline ((spanking, hitting, screaming) with neglect.

Child development psychologists posit that the seeds of bullying tendencies begin in toddlerhood when children are not provided effective discipline that helps them learn to manage their feelings and begin to develop empathy for others. Abuse also leads to rage that finds expression in bullying, among other things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Than at least its safe

White people commit the majority of crimes in this country, so that would make it more unsafe.

[Anonymous]

Bullying can happen at any school, OP. I don't know why people are jumping all over you. If you're interested in these schools, I would tour, not discount on the reports of your neighbor. I don't think you can predict when bullying will occur, but you can ask about social development, policies to prevent bullying.

However, from experience at a private school, not the ones you mentioned, if you're kid gets bullied, you'll need to keep on the HOS for a resolution and action. Not just sweeping it under the rug.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP is either a troll or an idiot.

Yes, I think she suffers from idiotism.

[Anonymous]

How is assuming conservatives are more likely to have racist children anything but racist?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We looked at Beauvoir but did not go through with the application because we thought it wasn't the right fit for our DD. That said, there seemed to be plenty of very happy looking, diverse kids. We know children of color who have attended and have never heard a word about racist children.

I also think, in general, people should be careful about throwing the word bullying around. Bullying is really a phenomenon that starts in late elementary and middle school, and is when a child is targeted by another kid or group of kids. Little kids not playing with each other day-to-day is not bullying, and IMO makes it difficult for us to deal with the real problem, which exists but is not everywhere a kid feels rejected.

Just because someone has not heard of something, it doesn't mean it's never happened. Children who are bullies can focus on any number of traits, including race. Most schools don't know how to deal with it. Most parents ignore it because they don't know how to deal with it either. It's possible that OP's neighbor either heard or experienced a discrete incident that was not repeated. Beauvoir does have some fairly conservative (read likely more racist) families. All it would take is one screwed up child who hears racist attitudes at home to spark a situation where a child of color is bullied on the basis of race.

You're absolutely wrong when you say bullying doesn't begin until the upper elementary grades. Most bullying is verbal, and it can begin as early as 4 or 5, when children begin to have enough cognitive skills to be manipulative. It can involve a child being targeted because they are different or simply because they are of a gentle temperament where they are not able to defend themselves against a concerted verbal assault. I've unfortunately witnessed two cases of it: once where the bully was an almost 5 year old and a second time with a 6 year old. In both cases, the bullying children had parents who were unable to discipline their children effectively and alternated abusve discipline ((spanking, hitting, screaming) with neglect.

Child development psychologists posit that the seeds of bullying tendencies begin in toddlerhood when children are not provided effective discipline that helps them learn to manage their feelings and begin to develop empathy for others. Abuse also leads to rage that finds expression in bullying, among other things.

This person makes me sick. Consevatives are not prone to racism anymore than liberals. We are prone to hating high taxes. Stoo injecting your politics into how kids treat each other. OP kids do not care about race and they also do not care about race. Pick a school that you have a good feeling for and make your best decision. SR and Beauvoir are great schools. The only consideration is it religion bothers you

[Anonymous]

Increasingly requiring voter - a practice promoted by conservatives - is inherently racist. 1) it's a constitutional right and 2) voter fraud is a myth.
http://www.nytimes.com/2014/06/11/upshot/vote-fraud-is-rare-but-myth-is-widespread.html?_r=0

When it is easier to buy a gun than vote, something is seriously wrong.

Conservatives need to ask themselves why there are so few people of color among them. Just look at any Republican national convention. They reel the diversity crowd into the first two rows to make it look like they are diverse.

Does that mean someone conservatives are racist? I wouldn't go as far as saying that. I would, however, recommend some deep reflection.

[Anonymous]

Actually, a number of studies have confirmed correlations between conservative ideology and racist attitudes. Conservatives believe in an individualist ideology that blames the disadvantaged members of our society for their own ills.

Here's an excerpt from a column by Goal Auzeen Saidi from Psychology Today:

[An article from] Psychological Science, which in essence confirms this [correlation between racism, lower IQ, and conservative ideology]:

Hodson and Busseri (2012) found in a correlational study that lower intelligence in childhood is predictive of greater racism in adulthood, with this effect being mediated (partially explained) through conservative ideology. They also found poor abstract reasoning skills were related to homophobic attitudes which was mediated through authoritarianism and low levels of intergroup contact.

Full text of the column at: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/millennial-media/201304/do-racism-conservatism-and-low-iq-go-hand-in-hand

Another article on the same study: http://www.livescience.com/18132-intelligence-social-conservatism-racism.html

The poster who suggests that to note conservatives are more likely to be racist is racist clearly fails to understand the institutional and systemic nature of racism.

And hating taxes does not make you a conservative in an of itself. Conservatism as an ideology is a bit more complex than that. Libertarians also hate taxes. I generally find libertarians much less racist and more intelligent than conservatives.

Note that the studies do not state that there is a causative link between conservatism and racism, but a correlation. That doesn't mean all conservatives are racist or of low IQ, and the studies are based on averages within groups. I've known some perfectly nice, non-racist conservatives. One is actually among my closest friends. That said, the correlation is there, and when you get large groups of conservatives together, there is a higher probability that someone in that group is going to be racist. Usually, in a place like Beauvoir, the parents will be smart enough to hide it. Their children may not be able to.