Let's Talk About African - American Children

[Anonymous]

I have an AA boy, in our Beauvoir graduating class only 2 out of 4 of the AA boys were admitted at STA. Of the 2 admitted only 1 accepted - our son. We've been told on several occasions that the "nicer" families leave after a few years. Our boy likes STA and enjoys playing sports. He has enough friends to get him through the day and is invited to birthday parties. Academically, he's being challenged and doing extremely well. He loves to learn, fully engaged in his academics. I'm observing the AA upper school boys each year and staying informed on any issues or concerns that they may have.


How did your AA boy do at Beauvoir???? Also, why do you think only 2 out of 4 boys were admitted to STA? Were they academically prepared for the program? Did the outplacement director inform these families that the chances for acceptance were slim??? Is this the norm for AA boys seeking admissions to STA???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As for Beauvoir, all minorities seem to fit in nicely from our perspective. What is odd though is that many leave Beauvoir and do not continue with the Cathedral schools. So maybe they didn't feel like they fit in?

I have an AA boy, in our Beauvoir graduating class only 2 out of 4 of the AA boys were admitted at STA. Of the 2 admitted only 1 accepted - our son. We've been told on several occasions that the "nicer" families leave after a few years. Our boy likes STA and enjoys playing sports. He has enough friends to get him through the day and is invited to birthday parties. Academically, he's being challenged and doing extremely well. He loves to learn, fully engaged in his academics. I'm observing the AA upper school boys each year and staying informed on any issues or concerns that they may have.

What does *that* mean? Nicer?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As for Beauvoir, all minorities seem to fit in nicely from our perspective. What is odd though is that many leave Beauvoir and do not continue with the Cathedral schools. So maybe they didn't feel like they fit in?

I have an AA boy, in our Beauvoir graduating class only 2 out of 4 of the AA boys were admitted at STA. Of the 2 admitted only 1 accepted - our son. We've been told on several occasions that the "nicer" families leave after a few years. Our boy likes STA and enjoys playing sports. He has enough friends to get him through the day and is invited to birthday parties. Academically, he's being challenged and doing extremely well. He loves to learn, fully engaged in his academics. I'm observing the AA upper school boys each year and staying informed on any issues or concerns that they may have.

What does *that* mean? Nicer?

When I kept hearing this "nicer" families comment during the admissions process and the constant warning, "you shouldn't send ds to that school," we ignored it. Strikes me as some sort of code.

Heck, if it doesn't work out, we simply leave the school and life goes on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I have an AA boy, in our Beauvoir graduating class only 2 out of 4 of the AA boys were admitted at STA. Of the 2 admitted only 1 accepted - our son. We've been told on several occasions that the "nicer" families leave after a few years. Our boy likes STA and enjoys playing sports. He has enough friends to get him through the day and is invited to birthday parties. Academically, he's being challenged and doing extremely well. He loves to learn, fully engaged in his academics. I'm observing the AA upper school boys each year and staying informed on any issues or concerns that they may have.

How did your AA boy do at Beauvoir???? Also, why do you think only 2 out of 4 boys were admitted to STA? Were they academically prepared for the program? Did the outplacement director inform these families that the chances for acceptance were slim??? Is this the norm for AA boys seeking admissions to STA???


He loooooved Beauvoir. His teachers and the school's head were intelligent, warm, and nurturing. We're happy that he attended Beauvoir during his elementary years. Many of the children he made friends with, I'm sure they will remain friends. Really kind and wonderful children, overall.

The other two boys test scores weren't that great. In addition, one didn't receive high recommendations from Beauvoir though his behavior was no worse than many of the other boys with behavior issues. The outplacement director provides feedback and suggests that you include additional schools to your list if necessary. I'm not sure if 50% being accepted is the norm. Other factors involved. The pool of AA boys applying from the outside is a bit larger. In each grade there appears to be 3-4 AA boys max with an additional 3-4 boys from families with African and/or Carib parents. On average there are 6-8 brown-skinned boys in each grade.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:...The issue is more with the parents. Where you find more uptight parents, such as at Beauvoir and Sidwell, you're bound to find folks who might not be terribly willing, or terribly good at, connecting with people of color. Or just terrible all around I suppose. In the "crunchier" schools, the afore-mentioned Lowell, for one, as well as Green Acres, and I'd add to the list GDS, you're bound to find more laid back parents, who in my experience are generally more willing, and better at, connecting with a wider range of people.

Can't say I have direct knowledge of Sheridan. We visited. Found it cozy and seemingly more of the "crunchy" type. But we didn't apply and don't know anyone there.

Good luck.

As a parent at one of the schools you mention I think its disrespectful and unfair of you to characterize the parents of Beauvoir and Sidwell as more uptight. Stop with all these awful generalizations.

OP - good luck with your choices.

OK, do your kids have any A-A friends? Do you chat up the A-A parents? Do you allow Blacks into your home?

my kids : platonic yes. [you forgot this one -dating yes].
my chat: yes.
my home: yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In each grade there appears to be 3-4 AA boys max with an additional 3-4 boys from families with African and/or Carib parents. On average there are 6-8 brown-skinned boys in each grade.

This kind of specificity is very helpful - but also really kind of breaks my heart to read for some reason.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In each grade there appears to be 3-4 AA boys max with an additional 3-4 boys from families with African and/or Carib parents. On average there are 6-8 brown-skinned boys in each grade.

This kind of specificity is very helpful - but also really kind of breaks my heart to read for some reason.

And I felt sad breaking it down like that.

On one hand, an excellent education can be gained at these schools, but,
you really have to be vigilant in safeguarding your child's psychological health while in them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In each grade there appears to be 3-4 AA boys max with an additional 3-4 boys from families with African and/or Carib parents. On average there are 6-8 brown-skinned boys in each grade.

This kind of specificity is very helpful - but also really kind of breaks my heart to read for some reason.

And I felt sad breaking it down like that.

On one hand, an excellent education can be gained at these schools, but,
you really have to be vigilant in safeguarding your child's psychological health while in them.

Yes, I get it totally. And the specificity helps paint a picture, there's no question.

As a white lesbian mother, diversity of many different types is important to us in selecting a school - because we know that, no matter what school our dc ends up at, there are not likely to be 6-8 children of same-sex couples or of lesbian or gay parents in any particular grade. And schools that really make best efforts to walk the walk in terms of racial diversity and socioeconomic diversity also tend to be more welcoming and celebratory of all kinds of families and children in our experience so far.

Kind of the difference between including Harriett Tubman in a history lesson just to "go there" at a superficial level and actually integrating an entire curricula with images, references, collateral materials, etc., that include human difference in all of its forms. A child cannot learn to respect what he/she does not learn to recognize exists. One of the most important values that we can instill in our young children as part of their education at home and at school, imho.

That's why I've been following this thread with interest.

[Anonymous]

There is absolutely no Afro-centric education at Beauvoir. But you won't get that at any of the Big Three or Big Ten. That's fine with us, an AA family. We paid over 100k for a Beauvoir education that stressed the basics, with a heavy emphasis on values, and which prepped DS for the next step.

Except that last year the entire school spent two months studying five African countries in the Global Studies program. I agree with your point overall...but "absolutely none" overstates the case.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In each grade there appears to be 3-4 AA boys max with an additional 3-4 boys from families with African and/or Carib parents. On average there are 6-8 brown-skinned boys in each grade.

This kind of specificity is very helpful - but also really kind of breaks my heart to read for some reason.

And I felt sad breaking it down like that.

On one hand, an excellent education can be gained at these schools, but,
you really have to be vigilant in safeguarding your child's psychological health while in them.

AA mom here with a son in an area independent school. While these numbers make me sad they also make me wonder. Is there a reason DC private schools are avoiding AA males. Any thoughts . . . AA Beauvoir Mom (PP) or others.

Also, AA Beauvoir Mom (PP) how have you safeguarded your son's psychological health?

How are things at STA for your son?

[Anonymous]

I don't necessarily think DC private schools are avoiding AA males. My AA son was accepted at a number of private schools, as were my friends' sons. But, I think AA parents are very wary of sending their sons to schools where they will be subject to different disciplinary standards from the other students, or where they will face lower (or higher) expectations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't necessarily think DC private schools are avoiding AA males. My AA son was accepted at a number of private schools, as were my friends' sons. But, I think AA parents are very wary of sending their sons to schools where they will be subject to different disciplinary standards from the other students, or where they will face lower (or higher) expectations.

Do you feel that your DS was subject to different discipline standards and faced lower or higher expectations while at Beauvoir and now while attending STA?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't necessarily think DC private schools are avoiding AA males. My AA son was accepted at a number of private schools, as were my friends' sons. But, I think AA parents are very wary of sending their sons to schools where they will be subject to different disciplinary standards from the other students, or where they will face lower (or higher) expectations.

Do you feel that your DS was subject to different discipline standards and faced lower or higher expectations while at Beauvoir and now while attending STA?

No, he wasn't subject to a different discipline standard, DS has a pretty easy going temperment. I have noticed that the more rambunctious AA boys are dealt with differently. We never felt that there was a reduction in expectations at Beauvoir, per se. Not until the outplacement director suggested we choose Lowell over STA. We hadn't considered Lowell. Didn't feel that its curriculum was rigorous enough for DS so didn't bother to apply. Too gray to read anything into the outplacement's director suggestion. Could have been based more so in regards to his temperment. She may have placed us in the "nicer" family pile.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In each grade there appears to be 3-4 AA boys max with an additional 3-4 boys from families with African and/or Carib parents. On average there are 6-8 brown-skinned boys in each grade.

This kind of specificity is very helpful - but also really kind of breaks my heart to read for some reason.

And I felt sad breaking it down like that.

On one hand, an excellent education can be gained at these schools, but,
you really have to be vigilant in safeguarding your child's psychological health while in them.

AA mom here with a son in an area independent school. While these numbers make me sad they also make me wonder. Is there a reason DC private schools are avoiding AA males. Any thoughts . . . AA Beauvoir Mom (PP) or others.

Also, AA Beauvoir Mom (PP) how have you safeguarded your son's psychological health?

How are things at STA for your son?

My son likes STA and is really into sports. He's a true scholar.

[Anonymous]

I am not AA, but one of the reasons we chose my DS school was for the diversity (our public school is not diverse). He is at Capitol Hill Day School and the percentage of AA children is in the high 30's. His class is 40% AA. As I understand the history of the school AA families were among the founding families. At least as I have observed friendships among kids and parents do not divide along racial (or any other) lines at all.