Seeking savvy input on structuring allowances for kids: first experience did not work!

[Anonymous]

I give my 4-year-old $4 a week, and she's expected to help me a little around the house. She'll have more $ and more chores as she gets older.

For us, allowance is used to pay for things I don't want to pay for. If she sees something she wants, like an American Girl outfit or a barbie doll, she has to decide if she likes it enough to plunder her allowance. And sometimes she doesn't have enough so she has to save up.

I buy her clothes, birthday gifts for other kids, occasional treats and toys. We also negotiate on special occasions, like on vacations - I'll say she has $X to spend on a souvenir and she has to stay within that range.

[Anonymous]

We link allowance to grade in school.

Loose change for the preschool set. 50 cents for K. $1.00/week/grade in school. My 2nd grader get $2.00/week, my 5th grader get $5.00/week and my 8th grader gets $8.00/week.

If the older kids/teens want more money to spend, then they will need to get a job, mow a neighbor's lawn, shovel snow, babysit. Tweens can help with feeding pets, walking the neighbor's dog, mother's helper type jobs.

My kids end up saving more than they spend because they are learning how much work goes into the money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:just a question. why some say that allowance should not be linked to chores? I am starting with this allowance thing, and I was planning to link it to the chores they need to do, like a sort of salary. why this should not be done? I was planning to have basic chores they need to do anyway (make their beds, cleaning table and so on) and elective chores they can do to make more money (kids are 4.5 and 8). I also started telling them that they will be "charged" when they ruin something (not always, only when I tell them not to do something a million times and they do it and ruin something, then I started telling them that they need to pay for the repair/purchase of new item - so far just telling them they need to pay for it has been sufficient to make them more careful with things)

1. Household work is done by all members of the household because we all live here and need a clean, comfortable house. My kids have to make their beds, clean the bathroom, sweep the kitchen, take out the trash, etc. because they live here and are members of the family - not because I will pay them for it.

2. If you pay them for chores they may decide that they would rather decline to do the work and forgo the money (turning the tables against you). In our house declining to do your share is just not an option.

We don't tie allowance to chores, either, but our kids are charged if they don't do their chores and we have to step in to do them. It's way more effective to charge $1 to pay mom to clean the sink than it is to deduct $1 from weekly allowance if you just don't clean the sink. Even kids feel differently when they actually have to cough up money, as opposed to just not getting more. (Think the bag tax vs. the 5 cents extra some stores give you for bringing your own.)

LOL, my oldest son would probably take the option to pay Mom $1, particularly if he's flush from earning extra money in his neighborhood side businesses! Think I'll stay away from that one, but thanks!
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[Anonymous]

What's the deal with you paying the tax? That just seems bizarre (and complicated!) to me.