Two-career couples: how much do you spend outsourcing household chores and child care?

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:HHI $160.
$0- he works day time, I work at night.


And how much do you spend on marriage counseling to deal with never seeing each other?


Not PP, but are you kidding? Not having to deal with your DH all the time sounds like an ideal arrangement to me!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Ing money on work clothes
Child care including afterschol care
Meals eaten out (or takeaway) that you do because you are too busy or too tired (not incl. date nites)
Money spent on commuting or parking, etc.
Also yard work and maintenance (I currently do my own mowing weed whacking etc.)

Thank you


Our HHI is roughly $200K (about $100K each).

Work clothes, we both work in business casual environments and don't spend extra for work clothes.
Daycare for toddler twins $34K
Roughly $30 per week. We probably each out once/week although we don't have to.
No money spent on commuting parking. Daycare is in the building one of us works in and the other parent works 4 miles away with free parking.
We spend about $800/year for yard/landscaping care for fertilizer, weed control, etc. But we use the same service that we used pre-kids, so kids have not added any to our budget.

I would estimate that it costs us about $40K for us both to work outside the home. But more importantly, we both have a lot of benefits including retirement, insurance, LTC, in addition to the salaries. It is definitely worthwhile for both of us to work.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Please direct me if there is already a thread on this subject;

I am trying to compare budgets to decide whether its worthwhile to work full time or more feasible to stay home.

I am wondering about total costs of all services incurred from working full time, such as
Dry cleaning and even spendi


People have varying spending habits.

I suggest keeping track of all your expenses on Quicken or other similar software for six months. Except for daycare expenses, save ALL of your post tax income during that time. This way you will see if SAH is feasible for your family.

Other things to consider:
1) How easy is it to return to your line of work? Will you need to keep up with any certification?
2) How much have you saved for retirement and how much will you be able to save on one salary? How much do you think you will need?
3) Are you intending to pay for all or part of your children's college? Can you save for that on one salary?
4) What is it like in your immediate neighborhood? Are there other sahps with similarly aged children?
5) Are you intending to stay in your current abode? What big tickets items are in the near future?
6) Is part time or reduced hours available to you or your spouse?
7) How strong is your marriage? Can't predict everything, but are there any cracks?

This is what my family did and addressed before we changed from dual income to woh/sah. There are advantages to both and there are disadvantages to both. Different things work for different families.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Meals/coffee at work (between the two of us, we are good about mostly bringing our lunch): $1500


I don't think this one should count, because you can go out for meals and coffee if you stay at home, just as easily as you can take your lunch to work everyday.
Anonymous
I really think the only expenses that one should count as going away are daycare/nanny/pre k. Everything else just gets traded in some way- sure gas is less but you need to park in metered spots more - yes you don't eat out as much but you need more groceries - sure you don't need as much dry cleaning but you'll need to sign the kids up for some kind of playbased crap. All those things might net you +100 a month ahead or they might not. The big ticket items - $35,000 for nannies and such is where the rubber hits the road.

And frankly the decision should be holistic anyway. Quitting your job at 40 with $5000 saved for retirement is a wholly different proposition than quitting at 30 with $1.5M saved.

You can always make quitting look worthwhile if you want to, just as you can make not quitting look obvious too. The poster who had $50,000 a year in expenses and made $90,000 might only clear $1,000 a month "extra". That's not peanuts but its not exactly the difference between early retirement and not either.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:HHI $160.
$0- he works day time, I work at night.


And how much do you spend on marriage counseling to deal with never seeing each other?


I bet there is a chance they have an awesome relationship because they appreciate the time they have together and are for Ed to share parental duties simply due the lack f the second spouse being home.

Don't judge what you don't know.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:HHI $160.
$0- he works day time, I work at night.


And how much do you spend on marriage counseling to deal with never seeing each other?


Not PP, but are you kidding? Not having to deal with your DH all the time sounds like an ideal arrangement to me!


+1
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:You have to remember all the additional costs of staying at home. Are you not going to send your child to preschool at all? Classes? Activities?

There's also increased utility costs, gas, lack of retirement contribution, the salary hit you'll take if/when you do decide to go back, etc...


+1

Most people who can afford it, do send their kids to preschool. And before that time, there is swimming, gymnastics, music class etc. You may not do those activities if you are working.

I break even as a working mom of 2. But, next year daycare will reduce and once my youngest turns 3 it will reduce again. Meanwhile, I'm saving for retirement, getting promotions, and building a career that will continue to advance.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:HHI 330K

Costs have decreased and the income has increased as the kids have gotten older. I also SAH for a year and a half with my first and had expenses then that I do not have now, like having too much time on my hands and spent money on crafty crap and shopping and redecorating.

-Childcare NOW is approx 22K/yr (down from 40K for the former nanny)
-I cook most every night, so there is no added expense
-I hardly dry clean, I'm in a very business casual company (IT-think Silicone Valley types) with that said, since I can buy "cute" clothes for work, I do enjoy some pleasure shopping. I spend about 10K/yr on clothes/shoes/accessories
-Commute probably costs me an extra 2 tanks of gas a month ($140)

I would say when all is said and done, working costs me an extra 35K/yr, but that is high side. Next year my youngest is in school and the daycare significantly goes down.

Happy to see someone else is spending similar $ on clothes! Sorry but no wonder DC is so frumpy! Most of you seem to spend more on having your homes cleaned.







Here is what I get from working:

-When I started back at work, I was making $25/hr for about 30hrs of work a week. 5 years later I'm at 163K/yr.
-In my 401K alone, I have just under 200K (unfortunately i was a 1099 for awhile).
-We have a lot of disposable income because we have had a number of homes over the last 11 years and have built up some equity and have a low mortgage. So YES I could SAH, but my income brings in a lot of extras that make life very comfortable.
Anonymous
I spend about $7,000 a year on clothes just for me. Wow at you ladies who spend next to nothing.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I spend about $7,000 a year on clothes just for me. Wow at you ladies who spend next to nothing.


Just did a search on Mint. In the past year, I have spent $2120 on clothing for a family of 4 - including DH who spent $600 on 2 suits. We get a lot of hand-me-downs for my kids (ages 4 and 5) and I shop twice a year at Marshalls and TJ Maxx for work dresses and buy basics - t's, tank tops, athletic wear from Old Navy. We both work F/T.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:HHI $160.
$0- he works day time, I work at night.


And how much do you spend on marriage counseling to deal with never seeing each other?


And when do you sleep, assuming you take care of kids during the day and work at night?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I spend about $7,000 a year on clothes just for me. Wow at you ladies who spend next to nothing.


You must like to shop and LOVE clothes. I hate to shop and am "eh" about clothes, so I don't spend more than I need. (My sister used to threaten to turn me into Stacy and Clinton, I can rest easy since they have "retired")

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I spend about $7,000 a year on clothes just for me. Wow at you ladies who spend next to nothing.


You must like to shop and LOVE clothes. I hate to shop and am "eh" about clothes, so I don't spend more than I need. (My sister used to threaten to turn me into Stacy and Clinton, I can rest easy since they have "retired")



I have a personal shopper. I spend about $2,200 about three times a year.
Anonymous
HHI $130, 1 toddler in daycare. All costs are estimate annually

commute/etc: probably 1k in additional gas, no parking $, no metro
food: 0. If I'm too tired to cook we have cereal or scrambled eggs, because then I am also too tired to deal with ordering food.
daycare: $16k annually for 1 kid (not infant price). I estimate that 1 infant + 1 toddler would be about $28k.
clothing: $2400? Maybe? DH and I have both been working so long (with similar wardrobe requirements) that there's lots of carryover. Total estimate. And if one of us wasn't working, we would spend more on casual clothes b/c we would need them more. Also, SAHP would have more time for shopping (eyeing YOU, DH, Mr Shopaholic, lol)
housecleaning and other interior help: 0
landscaping and other exterior help: 0

Also, DH and I have kind of weird schedules, which limit our options for visiting my parents. SAH = increased visiting = factor in cost of therapy
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