Very bright 4.5yo and waiting a Whole Other Year to start K

[Anonymous]

I have met kids who were a grade ahead and it seemed like a good decision socially and academically (but the kid I know best had a November birthday, so he was just a little younger than his peers).

The one kid I know who is two grades ahead doesn't seem to fit socially. He's not horrible socially, but he doesn't have a best friend, cries when teased, etc. (he's almost 9 and starting 5th).

I also think academics are more cut and dry - if you think your kid is advanced and his teachers agree, he probably is. However, you might well be delusional about his social skills because it's more of a gray area.

It doesn't really sounds like your kid or you have a problem. Not all very bright people are bored in school. My DH is gifted and was very good at finding side projects in school with his teachers help. Being able to keep yourself on task and finding things that interest you is a great skill for an advanced learner to develop.

[Anonymous]

It also depends where they are on everything else. Sports for instance was an area where my son lagged a little so it was better he started on time and could keep up with his school mates. And even if they are ahead in all aspects of growth, it may be unlikely that they will continue this way throughout school. School leaves out so much. There's lots more to focus on if you don't have to struggle with academics.

[Anonymous]

Your special snowflake might do well in a Montessori program.

[Anonymous]

If you skip him ahead, in a few years you will be back asking for a way to hold him back a year.

[Anonymous]

You need to calm down, OP. Try not to set him up for "being bored" in school because you think he's so bright. Kids hear this stuff and they begin to believe it, even if it isn't true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You need to calm down, OP. Try not to set him up for "being bored" in school because you think he's so bright. Kids hear this stuff and they begin to believe it, even if it isn't true.

+1. But, The Whole Other Year made me smile.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you skip him ahead, in a few years you will be back asking for a way to hold him back a year.

This is not always true. My DS had to skip two grades (he graduated high school at 16 & 1/2) in order to be at a level where he wasn't bored. Even with that he was taking AP courses and getting college credits in high school. We never once thought of holding him back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to calm down, OP. Try not to set him up for "being bored" in school because you think he's so bright. Kids hear this stuff and they begin to believe it, even if it isn't true.

+1. But, The Whole Other Year made me smile.

OP here. I don't tell my kid he's going to be bored, he'd take that as an excuse to misbehave! Nor have we ever told him that he's one of the smartest kids in his class. I guess I'm starting to realize that since I wasn't really challenged throughout elementary and HS, and neither was DH (I didn't act up, but DH did), then it's probably going to be the same thing for DS.

And perhaps this is why there are so many 'tiger parents', we want our kids to get the most out of school...but there is probably a lot of merit in just letting them go with the flow and enjoying the experience. I mean, it's not BAD being one of the 'smart kids'! (At least it wasn't for me...)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to calm down, OP. Try not to set him up for "being bored" in school because you think he's so bright. Kids hear this stuff and they begin to believe it, even if it isn't true.

+1. But, The Whole Other Year made me smile.

OP here. I don't tell my kid he's going to be bored, he'd take that as an excuse to misbehave! Nor have we ever told him that he's one of the smartest kids in his class. I guess I'm starting to realize that since I wasn't really challenged throughout elementary and HS, and neither was DH (I didn't act up, but DH did), then it's probably going to be the same thing for DS.

And perhaps this is why there are so many 'tiger parents', we want our kids to get the most out of school...but there is probably a lot of merit in just letting them go with the flow and enjoying the experience. I mean, it's not BAD being one of the 'smart kids'! (At least it wasn't for me...)

Your kid hasn't even started kindergarten yet. I think it's quite a leap to assume that he will not be challenged in school throughout elementary and high school. Especially once he hits third grade where the AAP or G&T programs start. Reading and playing with legos at 4.5 isn't so incredibly exceptional that there is no hope that he will ever be challenged in school.

[Anonymous]

Didn't read all this, but my neighbor was in the same situation and she put her DD in a private (catholic) preK/kindergarten class for one year and then into our public school kindergarten class the following year.

[Anonymous]

OP, a few years ago I remember thinking the same as you. Fast forward a few years and believe me, there are a TON of smart kids out there. Your kid is not as exceptional as you think. I know mine isn't. Plus kids mature at different rates, even though yours is reading, etc. now - there will be kids that start reading later that will blow right by him on the reading levels because they are better writers and/or more creative.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to calm down, OP. Try not to set him up for "being bored" in school because you think he's so bright. Kids hear this stuff and they begin to believe it, even if it isn't true.

+1. But, The Whole Other Year made me smile.

OP here. I don't tell my kid he's going to be bored, he'd take that as an excuse to misbehave! Nor have we ever told him that he's one of the smartest kids in his class. I guess I'm starting to realize that since I wasn't really challenged throughout elementary and HS, and neither was DH (I didn't act up, but DH did), then it's probably going to be the same thing for DS.

And perhaps this is why there are so many 'tiger parents', we want our kids to get the most out of school...but there is probably a lot of merit in just letting them go with the flow and enjoying the experience. I mean, it's not BAD being one of the 'smart kids'! (At least it wasn't for me...)

Why would you assume this? Did you and DH attend the same school and will you be sending DS there as well?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to calm down, OP. Try not to set him up for "being bored" in school because you think he's so bright. Kids hear this stuff and they begin to believe it, even if it isn't true.

+1. But, The Whole Other Year made me smile.

OP here. I don't tell my kid he's going to be bored, he'd take that as an excuse to misbehave! Nor have we ever told him that he's one of the smartest kids in his class. I guess I'm starting to realize that since I wasn't really challenged throughout elementary and HS, and neither was DH (I didn't act up, but DH did), then it's probably going to be the same thing for DS.

And perhaps this is why there are so many 'tiger parents', we want our kids to get the most out of school...but there is probably a lot of merit in just letting them go with the flow and enjoying the experience. I mean, it's not BAD being one of the 'smart kids'! (At least it wasn't for me...)

OP, you are just proving the point that you need to relax. You are projecting your own experience on to your son. You are worrying about a situation that hasn't happened yet. Your kid is not you. But, he will pick up on your vibes. My kids are in upper elementary, and it's clear that the kids who suffer from anxiety usually have anxious parents.

[Anonymous]

13:14 didn't see pp's comment echoing same...