Pregnant and no motivation to go to work anymore--just me?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NP. I can completely relate to this feeling. I'm a new mom that doesn't have baby here yet, but the idea of "leaning in" just makes me want to check out professionally. I give 100% at work and love what I do, but I believe sometimes priorities need to adjust for seasons, and this is a case where it is acceptable. On top of that, I am in a graduate program so will likely be taking a leave of absence from that too.

It took so long for baby to come, and now that it is getting close, I just want to cherish the time and give my 100% to her. At least until she is a little bit older!

Not that people can't do both or more (work, school and parent), but why does it have to carry such a professional stigma? I wish corporate america were more family friendly in general, like other countries are when it comes to maternity leave and starting a family.

I feel like you have to prove people that you aren't lazy when you are pregnant. When really - you ARE feeling lazy, tired, sore, and irritated -- but it's only because you are pregnant and doing work all the time in making another life!!! I know we CAN do both, but not sure that we always SHOULD do both.

Sigh.

But you want to get paid like you are doing both, right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP. I can completely relate to this feeling. I'm a new mom that doesn't have baby here yet, but the idea of "leaning in" just makes me want to check out professionally. I give 100% at work and love what I do, but I believe sometimes priorities need to adjust for seasons, and this is a case where it is acceptable. On top of that, I am in a graduate program so will likely be taking a leave of absence from that too.

It took so long for baby to come, and now that it is getting close, I just want to cherish the time and give my 100% to her. At least until she is a little bit older!

Not that people can't do both or more (work, school and parent), but why does it have to carry such a professional stigma? I wish corporate america were more family friendly in general, like other countries are when it comes to maternity leave and starting a family.

I feel like you have to prove people that you aren't lazy when you are pregnant. When really - you ARE feeling lazy, tired, sore, and irritated -- but it's only because you are pregnant and doing work all the time in making another life!!! I know we CAN do both, but not sure that we always SHOULD do both.

Sigh.

But you want to get paid like you are doing both, right?

Umm..no, I didn't say that. You said that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP. I can completely relate to this feeling. I'm a new mom that doesn't have baby here yet, but the idea of "leaning in" just makes me want to check out professionally. I give 100% at work and love what I do, but I believe sometimes priorities need to adjust for seasons, and this is a case where it is acceptable. On top of that, I am in a graduate program so will likely be taking a leave of absence from that too.

It took so long for baby to come, and now that it is getting close, I just want to cherish the time and give my 100% to her. At least until she is a little bit older!

Not that people can't do both or more (work, school and parent), but why does it have to carry such a professional stigma? I wish corporate america were more family friendly in general, like other countries are when it comes to maternity leave and starting a family.

I feel like you have to prove people that you aren't lazy when you are pregnant. When really - you ARE feeling lazy, tired, sore, and irritated -- but it's only because you are pregnant and doing work all the time in making another life!!! I know we CAN do both, but not sure that we always SHOULD do both.

Sigh.

But you want to get paid like you are doing both, right?

Umm..no, I didn't say that. You said that.

So, how can corporate american be more family friendly?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP. I can completely relate to this feeling. I'm a new mom that doesn't have baby here yet, but the idea of "leaning in" just makes me want to check out professionally. I give 100% at work and love what I do, but I believe sometimes priorities need to adjust for seasons, and this is a case where it is acceptable. On top of that, I am in a graduate program so will likely be taking a leave of absence from that too.

It took so long for baby to come, and now that it is getting close, I just want to cherish the time and give my 100% to her. At least until she is a little bit older!

Not that people can't do both or more (work, school and parent), but why does it have to carry such a professional stigma? I wish corporate america were more family friendly in general, like other countries are when it comes to maternity leave and starting a family.

I feel like you have to prove people that you aren't lazy when you are pregnant. When really - you ARE feeling lazy, tired, sore, and irritated -- but it's only because you are pregnant and doing work all the time in making another life!!! I know we CAN do both, but not sure that we always SHOULD do both.

Sigh.

But you want to get paid like you are doing both, right?

Umm..no, I didn't say that. You said that.

Lots of women in this post are saying this though. They are slacking off at work instead of quitting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP. I can completely relate to this feeling. I'm a new mom that doesn't have baby here yet, but the idea of "leaning in" just makes me want to check out professionally. I give 100% at work and love what I do, but I believe sometimes priorities need to adjust for seasons, and this is a case where it is acceptable. On top of that, I am in a graduate program so will likely be taking a leave of absence from that too.

It took so long for baby to come, and now that it is getting close, I just want to cherish the time and give my 100% to her. At least until she is a little bit older!

Not that people can't do both or more (work, school and parent), but why does it have to carry such a professional stigma? I wish corporate america were more family friendly in general, like other countries are when it comes to maternity leave and starting a family.

I feel like you have to prove people that you aren't lazy when you are pregnant. When really - you ARE feeling lazy, tired, sore, and irritated -- but it's only because you are pregnant and doing work all the time in making another life!!! I know we CAN do both, but not sure that we always SHOULD do both.

Sigh.

But you want to get paid like you are doing both, right?

Umm..no, I didn't say that. You said that.

So, how can corporate american be more family friendly?

Allowing longer maternity leave periods would be one great example. 12 weeks is not that much time for many moms. Many take less. Many have time and can't risk taking it for job security. Some don't get any maternity leave and have to save all of their vacation and sick leave. Many people don't have flex time, telecommute, etc. options once baby is born to help with the transition back to office.

A 12-month maternity leave period is common practice in other places (Europe, Canada). I think its great that there are countries where working professional women can take paid maternity leave for up to a year, not go broke for doing it, and have someone come to your home to assist with caring for baby, and then return to their secured position. How wonderful would that be? Of course, it would come with a cost, but it would be nice to have the OPTION and a corporate attitude that even supports something like that here in the U.S.

Of course there are other things that could be done, and many companies do have family friendly policies in place, but everyone doesn't always have access to those types of situations. At the end of the day, I think it would just be nice to allow an opportunity for a mom to have a more supportive corporate environment if they want to step away from the rat race for a minute - then come back to what they did well before without penalty or stigma for stepping away.

Most women can't do that because of the challenge in fighting to move upward, then needing to protect and preserve that spot, esp. in a male dominated industries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP. I can completely relate to this feeling. I'm a new mom that doesn't have baby here yet, but the idea of "leaning in" just makes me want to check out professionally. I give 100% at work and love what I do, but I believe sometimes priorities need to adjust for seasons, and this is a case where it is acceptable. On top of that, I am in a graduate program so will likely be taking a leave of absence from that too.

It took so long for baby to come, and now that it is getting close, I just want to cherish the time and give my 100% to her. At least until she is a little bit older!

Not that people can't do both or more (work, school and parent), but why does it have to carry such a professional stigma? I wish corporate america were more family friendly in general, like other countries are when it comes to maternity leave and starting a family.

I feel like you have to prove people that you aren't lazy when you are pregnant. When really - you ARE feeling lazy, tired, sore, and irritated -- but it's only because you are pregnant and doing work all the time in making another life!!! I know we CAN do both, but not sure that we always SHOULD do both.

Sigh.

But you want to get paid like you are doing both, right?

Umm..no, I didn't say that. You said that.

So, how can corporate american be more family friendly?

Allowing longer maternity leave periods would be one great example. 12 weeks is not that much time for many moms. Many take less. Many have time and can't risk taking it for job security. Some don't get any maternity leave and have to save all of their vacation and sick leave. Many people don't have flex time, telecommute, etc. options once baby is born to help with the transition back to office.

A 12-month maternity leave period is common practice in other places (Europe, Canada). I think its great that there are countries where working professional women can take paid maternity leave for up to a year, not go broke for doing it, and have someone come to your home to assist with caring for baby, and then return to their secured position. How wonderful would that be? Of course, it would come with a cost, but it would be nice to have the OPTION and a corporate attitude that even supports something like that here in the U.S.

Of course there are other things that could be done, and many companies do have family friendly policies in place, but everyone doesn't always have access to those types of situations. At the end of the day, I think it would just be nice to allow an opportunity for a mom to have a more supportive corporate environment if they want to step away from the rat race for a minute - then come back to what they did well before without penalty or stigma for stepping away.

Most women can't do that because of the challenge in fighting to move upward, then needing to protect and preserve that spot, esp. in a male dominated industries.

Then we as a society would have to determine if we want to in effect pay women to have kids. I don't think that's going to happen anytime soon in this country.

[Anonymous]

first pregnancy--i worked up until signs of impending labor (bloody show) so worked from home for remaining 1.5 days before going to the hospital. I was also working to secure my promotion which was given to me while on maternity leave.

this time (35 weeks), i have lost all motivation b/c i feel it more this time around but more b/c work has gotten way too political and there's a crazy witch (boss's secretary) who is calling too many of the shots for everyone in the office. good chance she'll be leaving before i return from maternity leave. but i've checked out largely b/c of her and her BS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP. I can completely relate to this feeling. I'm a new mom that doesn't have baby here yet, but the idea of "leaning in" just makes me want to check out professionally. I give 100% at work and love what I do, but I believe sometimes priorities need to adjust for seasons, and this is a case where it is acceptable. On top of that, I am in a graduate program so will likely be taking a leave of absence from that too.

It took so long for baby to come, and now that it is getting close, I just want to cherish the time and give my 100% to her. At least until she is a little bit older!

Not that people can't do both or more (work, school and parent), but why does it have to carry such a professional stigma? I wish corporate america were more family friendly in general, like other countries are when it comes to maternity leave and starting a family.

I feel like you have to prove people that you aren't lazy when you are pregnant. When really - you ARE feeling lazy, tired, sore, and irritated -- but it's only because you are pregnant and doing work all the time in making another life!!! I know we CAN do both, but not sure that we always SHOULD do both.

Sigh.

But you want to get paid like you are doing both, right?

Umm..no, I didn't say that. You said that.

Lots of women in this post are saying this though. They are slacking off at work instead of quitting.

Well, that is them, not me. I can't speak for them. As I said, I give 100% and I enjoy my work. But I completely understand (and dont judge) the conflict being discussed here, and know I will face a crossroads soon.

Anyway, I think the feelings of tiredness and having less motivation is totally normal! It's a life changing event. Everyone has ebbs in flows in performance from time to time. Pregnant or not. It happens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP. I can completely relate to this feeling. I'm a new mom that doesn't have baby here yet, but the idea of "leaning in" just makes me want to check out professionally. I give 100% at work and love what I do, but I believe sometimes priorities need to adjust for seasons, and this is a case where it is acceptable. On top of that, I am in a graduate program so will likely be taking a leave of absence from that too.

It took so long for baby to come, and now that it is getting close, I just want to cherish the time and give my 100% to her. At least until she is a little bit older!

Not that people can't do both or more (work, school and parent), but why does it have to carry such a professional stigma? I wish corporate america were more family friendly in general, like other countries are when it comes to maternity leave and starting a family.

I feel like you have to prove people that you aren't lazy when you are pregnant. When really - you ARE feeling lazy, tired, sore, and irritated -- but it's only because you are pregnant and doing work all the time in making another life!!! I know we CAN do both, but not sure that we always SHOULD do both.

Sigh.

But you want to get paid like you are doing both, right?

Umm..no, I didn't say that. You said that.

So, how can corporate american be more family friendly?

Allowing longer maternity leave periods would be one great example. 12 weeks is not that much time for many moms. Many take less. Many have time and can't risk taking it for job security. Some don't get any maternity leave and have to save all of their vacation and sick leave. Many people don't have flex time, telecommute, etc. options once baby is born to help with the transition back to office.

A 12-month maternity leave period is common practice in other places (Europe, Canada). I think its great that there are countries where working professional women can take paid maternity leave for up to a year, not go broke for doing it, and have someone come to your home to assist with caring for baby, and then return to their secured position. How wonderful would that be? Of course, it would come with a cost, but it would be nice to have the OPTION and a corporate attitude that even supports something like that here in the U.S.

Of course there are other things that could be done, and many companies do have family friendly policies in place, but everyone doesn't always have access to those types of situations. At the end of the day, I think it would just be nice to allow an opportunity for a mom to have a more supportive corporate environment if they want to step away from the rat race for a minute - then come back to what they did well before without penalty or stigma for stepping away.

Most women can't do that because of the challenge in fighting to move upward, then needing to protect and preserve that spot, esp. in a male dominated industries.

Then we as a society would have to determine if we want to in effect pay women to have kids. I don't think that's going to happen anytime soon in this country.

OK, I'm bowing out of this one. I'm too tired to even go there tonight. TGIF!

[Anonymous]

Me too... I feel like quitting

[Anonymous]

Me too.... *I feel like quitting my job as well...

[Anonymous]

Work full time and I am just about to finish grad school in two weeks--almost at 16 weeks mark. There are days where I don't want to get out of bed and my brain is not functioning at all, but I have to keep working due to my financial obligations and I like my own source of income. I think you will get back to your "normal self" a few months after your bundle of joy comes. Hang in there!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, thanks, ladies. I'm just headed into the second trimester, but it's been like this off and on for months now.

Still you collect your paycheck gleefully knowing that you are a useless piece of crap, and that you can you not be fired but your job has to be held open for you.

While I loathe Trump, this is one thing I hope he changes immediately. No more pregnancy/pumping special privileges.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, thanks, ladies. I'm just headed into the second trimester, but it's been like this off and on for months now.

Still you collect your paycheck gleefully knowing that you are a useless piece of crap, and that you can you not be fired but your job has to be held open for you.

While I loathe Trump, this is one thing I hope he changes immediately. No more pregnancy/pumping special privileges.

Wow. Just wow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, thanks, ladies. I'm just headed into the second trimester, but it's been like this off and on for months now.

Still you collect your paycheck gleefully knowing that you are a useless piece of crap, and that you can you not be fired but your job has to be held open for you.

While I loathe Trump, this is one thing I hope he changes immediately. No more pregnancy/pumping special privileges.

I always wonder who these people are...I guess either

(a) Trolls
(b) Bitter, misogynistic men who want to blame their own career failures on anything other than their own lack of ability
(c) Jealous women

I also wonder how they ooze their way to forums for pregnant moms. Maybe through "Recent Posts."

If workplace accommodations bother you, go work in some part of the world where they don't exist--for you or for anybody else.

Everybody's performance ebbs and flows. It's not an issue that is unique to pregnancy. Men and women are responsible for eldercare, baby care, go through their own illnesses, whatever.