Counseled Out Of Sidwell

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:


I find it hard to believe that schools counsel out kids regularly. It would make the school look bad and the admissions department look bad too. These kids are screened so hard before entering it is unlikely they woould be wrong about so many kids. If there is a school that regularly does this then that school is f-------d up! It is damaging to kids down the line to move schools abrubtly for no apparent reason like a move for a new job. For many kids, especially those whose option after leaving a private school would be entering a school that mauch larger,or a failing school in a rough area this would be too much for them. You can't put kids in a bubble then just take them out. That just seems wrong.

I would assume this is seldom done abruptly. If, over the course of 2-4 years, the teacher reports (report cards) are indicating issues, and the parents and school try to address it unsuccessfully, then it is probably clear that it isn't a good fit. It isn't like anyone, including the students, are blindsided by this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You've noted from prior posts that there are indeed kids who are counseled out who go on to do well at other schools, private and public. That's because counseling-out is inherently highly subjective. It does NOT mean that a child is dumb, or dangerous, or non-social.

It may also be because the new school is a better fit.

[Anonymous]

The question is, though, how does the school determine who is a "bad fit"? Even if you assume the school's motives are benevolent, I still wonder why some kids were counselled out and other kids who were in the same boat academically were allowed to stay? In some cases, yes, the kids who were counselled out also had some social/behavioral issues, but not always. In some cases, yes, the kids who were counselled out had PITA parents, but not always. Sidwell faculty members can be very judgmental about kids at times, and gossipy, and I have always wondered whether that was really what was involved in some of the counselling out decisions, more than concern for a child's well-being.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The question is, though, how does the school determine who is a "bad fit"? Even if you assume the school's motives are benevolent, I still wonder why some kids were counselled out and other kids who were in the same boat academically were allowed to stay? In some cases, yes, the kids who were counselled out also had some social/behavioral issues, but not always. In some cases, yes, the kids who were counselled out had PITA parents, but not always. Sidwell faculty members can be very judgmental about kids at times, and gossipy, and I have always wondered whether that was really what was involved in some of the counselling out decisions, more than concern for a child's well-being.

And you know this because?

[Anonymous]

My comments are based on direct experience -- I'm a parent of current Sidwell students and grads, I've heard the things that teachers say about my kids and their peers.

[Anonymous]

Don't leave out parents. They are very gossipy too! Not just Sidwell, I have a DC at a different school and some parents enjoy gossiping about other people's kids. Usually their kids are the same way and you see where it comes from. I imagine, if enough people are talking about one child, the child is percieved as having MAJOR issues and that can start a ball rolling. It's sad if it does....all I can say is Karma is a B!@#$!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The question is, though, how does the school determine who is a "bad fit"? Even if you assume the school's motives are benevolent, I still wonder why some kids were counselled out and other kids who were in the same boat academically were allowed to stay? In some cases, yes, the kids who were counselled out also had some social/behavioral issues, but not always. In some cases, yes, the kids who were counselled out had PITA parents, but not always. Sidwell faculty members can be very judgmental about kids at times, and gossipy, and I have always wondered whether that was really what was involved in some of the counselling out decisions, more than concern for a child's well-being.

In our experience (diff private) the school counseled out a classmate who was struggling academically but who was clearly bright. The administration and teachers felt that the student simply wasn't doing as well as she could be because of the learning style of the student and the school's teaching style. (No learning disabilities.) Once the student changed schools to an equally rigorous program, she excelled and was one of the top students in her class. Sometimes it really IS about "fit" and teachers and administrators see it happen more often in the upper grades.

[Anonymous]

Agree with PP's assessment. The social element can also complicate things and can add to the struggle sometimes. A new school and a "do-over" with new kids socially can also help a child who is struggling academically and socially - worked for one of my children.

[Anonymous]

Students are counseled out in elementary school. It is a shame and way too early. Read the school handbook. It will tell you something about when a kid will have an academic issue worthy of seeking other academic environments.