I had two bottles of the magnesium citrate... and after realizing I shouldn't drink the RED colored bottle (what was I thinking? they don't want to see any red during your colonoscopy), I drank two of the yellows. Chill them in the fridge before drinking. Pour it into a glass, have a chaser nearby (whatever is on the acceptable list! I already like the sugarless gatoraide type drinks) and drink the first bottle straight down (chug it... you remember college? or high school?). You can either hold your nose, or what I find so much easier, DO NOT breathe through your nose at any time, just be a mouth breather. It's the same as holding your nose. Things "taste" bad mainly because we "smell" them. No air going into our out of your nose... no taste.
OK, so I've already prepared for what is to come. You will need to be near a toilet from now on. Not right next to it... the other room is fine. You need something to pass the time you are there. Thank goodness for my iPad. Or a book. Or whatever. You get some GREAT alone time! And... I wasn't in there for that long each time. I nixed the tp for flushable baby wipes... no sense irritating yourself down there... (and after the first explosion, I opted for a shower to clean up... and you feel clean after a shower!) It's not a big deal... just go with it. You can have chicken broth, clear liquids, jello (choose the right color), and they say even beef broth, but I would avoid that the next time... beef broth is brown, which can be confusing while cleansing. No liquids after midnight. I did not have to get up a single time all night. Woke up to the alarm. Which I set a tad early.
Day of...
I set the alarm a tad early because, while I understand what needs to be done, and realize they do this all the time, you have this fear that you aren't totally clean. I jumped in the shower and emptied out a store bought enema... some sort of saline laxative in it... I just put in fresh, warm water. And... (you either know how this works, or you learn), gave myself one... the fluid that came back in the toilet was a little too yellowish for my liking, so I did a second, and it was much cleaner. We're talking 10 minutes at the most here. Now I felt clean and confident.
The colonoscopy itself? I have heard such TOTAL horror stories. Turns out... tuning out the prep part... I'd rather go through the colonoscopy part more than a cleaning by my dentist. They give an IV sedating drug that pretty much lets you sleep through the whole thing. They watch for any pain you have, and generally are on top of it before you can even utter a word, since they see it on your face. The pain? Have you ever had a gas pain while sitting in a chair? That's about it. They make the pain go away fast. And... I shouldn't even call it pain, since it is just being so damn uncomfortable... for about 15 seconds. Big whoop. I don't remember much about the rest of it (that's due to the twilight drugs!), and just remember waking up at the very end. I saw some great pictures on the screen of my insides just as he was finishing up and tagging the photos. It was like the procedure was started... and then suddenly was over before I even knew it. They wheeled me off to the prep room... just a big room with curtains, because... this aint surgery... and the doctor explained what he saw to my wife and myself. And... I don't remember anything the doctor said (ha!) so always have someone with you that will remember what the doc recommends. I had no polyps, but some diverticulosis. Instructions were: go on a high fiber diet.
So... the procedure felt like it lasted only about 10 minutes or so... maybe less... but I don't remember. That's the beauty of the drug. You start forgetting, even though what I forgot wasn't bad at all. I was driven home, and spent the rest of the day is a joyous relaxed state. You will even want to take a nap. Nothing hurts. All is good. I really don't know why I was so worried... it had to be done... and look at the glass half full... I was so relaxed for the rest of the day... I now dread a teeth cleaning more than a colonoscopy. Go figure.
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