Letter asking for donations while church shopping - If you're not Christian please skip this thread

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I find it ironic that the "true Christian" who replied to you gave you the example of Saul and David. I don't remember them being Christians.

That's why I didn't want non believers here. Any Christian knows that the Old Testament is part of our Bible thus a valid example in any case.

OMG can we please focus here?

It's interesting that you believe that Jews are "non-believers" but at the same time you also somehow believe that Saul and David are a part of your Bible and a part of your religion. How does that work out? How can modern day Jews be "not believing" in any religion but the actual tenets of their faith (like Saul and David) are somehow real and tangible to you? Do you make this up as you go along?

Feel free to start another thread about this. Here we're discussing what (if at all) I should write to a pastor that I don't even know.

Thanks for keeping the thread on the original track.

You're new here, huh? You might as well be told - once you post something, it's fair game. You don't get to dictate how the thread goes. Consider this a public service announcement.

Now I'll chime in, because I get to. See how that works? Nonbelievers is a really insulting term. People believe in a lot of things, other religions and other philosophies, or they just "believe" in doing nice things for people.
Christians do not have the market cornered on what it means to behave appropriately. Case in point, the pastor you have mentioned. It's rude for the first communication of any group to anyone to be that of soliciting money. One doesn't have to be a Christian to know that.

[jsteele]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I find it ironic that the "true Christian" who replied to you gave you the example of Saul and David. I don't remember them being Christians.

That's why I didn't want non believers here. Any Christian knows that the Old Testament is part of our Bible thus a valid example in any case.

OMG can we please focus here?

It's interesting that you believe that Jews are "non-believers" but at the same time you also somehow believe that Saul and David are a part of your Bible and a part of your religion. How does that work out? How can modern day Jews be "not believing" in any religion but the actual tenets of their faith (like Saul and David) are somehow real and tangible to you? Do you make this up as you go along?

Feel free to start another thread about this. Here we're discussing what (if at all) I should write to a pastor that I don't even know.

Thanks for keeping the thread on the original track.

You're new here, huh? You might as well be told - once you post something, it's fair game. You don't get to dictate how the thread goes. Consider this a public service announcement.

Now I'll chime in, because I get to. See how that works? Nonbelievers is a really insulting term. People believe in a lot of things, other religions and other philosophies, or they just "believe" in doing nice things for people.
Christians do not have the market cornered on what it means to behave appropriately. Case in point, the pastor you have mentioned. It's rude for the first communication of any group to anyone to be that of soliciting money. One doesn't have to be a Christian to know that.

Someone started a thread in the Website Feedback forum about this thread, suggesting that the original poster shouldn't try to exclude non-Christians. This was my reply:

I disagree. The goal of DCUM is to provide helpful and useful information. If a poster believes that the most useful information will come from a certain group of people, why shouldn't she address her question to that group? I've made the analogy before that a person seeking assistance with a dog probably will not be helped by a person replying with information gained from owning a cat. It is really irritating how often someone asks a fairly simple question and is greeted by a slew of attack dogs. I'm making this example up, but is it really helpful for someone to ask a question about how to grill a steak to be answered by someone telling them that eating meat is inhumane? Yes, it is perfectly valid to oppose eating meat and anyone is allowed to start a thread suggesting such. But, why make DCUM unwelcoming and unhelpful by hijacking threads?

If you want to mock a religion, you are more than welcome to start a thread and mock away. But, please let other people get the information they are seeking.

[Anonymous]

Thanks a lot Jeff!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP,

I personally would send a letter to the Pastor. I have a huge problem with churches who aggressively seek money from the members. I'm a Christian (non-denominational) and while my church has offering, my Pastor always stretches that you give what you can...none of that 10% drivel.

At least this church did you a favor by allowing you to cross them off of your list.

That's exactly DH's view. He said "I'm glad we didn't waste our time going there again".

This is the way I was raised... God wants you to contribute with your heart being it financially or not. He wants you to give away happily and not in sacrifice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think no matter how you word it, it will sound like you are telling him how to run his church. I like the kinder "you must have made a mistake!" approach suggested above, if you feel you need to say anything all. Personally, I would just move on.

That's exactly what I want to avoid... Thanks for calling me out on that.

I'm not the pp you are responding to, but I say...why avoid it? Pastors, priests, rabbis, etc are not infallible, they are men (in most cases). I think it would be *very* important for him to know how his church is coming across to non-members. Someone else may be in charge of sending these letters out and he may not realize how it all sounds. Perhaps, this will result in a change in the way in which this church words their donation letters.

This is exactly what I wanted him to "watch out" for...

I guess I'm writing this letter.

[Anonymous]

12:42 there is also an admonition to beware of false prophets. OP, I have never heard of such a thing and I do not subscribe to the idea that a minister/pastor/Pope are infallible. I would be leery and ignore his letter. Remember that one can be annointed via the internet these days.

I would suggest that you attend services at as many churches as necessary until you find one in which you are comfortable and where the minister's sermon gives you spiritual sustanance for the week. God welcomes all and money is not a factor in worship or salvation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP,

I personally would send a letter to the Pastor. I have a huge problem with churches who aggressively seek money from the members. I'm a Christian (non-denominational) and while my church has offering, my Pastor always stretches that you give what you can...none of that 10% drivel.

At least this church did you a favor by allowing you to cross them off of your list.

That's exactly DH's view. He said "I'm glad we didn't waste our time going there again".

This is the way I was raised... God wants you to contribute with your heart being it financially or not. He wants you to give away happily and not in sacrifice.

Glad that helped you. And BTW, I should have written "always *stresses* that you give...".

[Anonymous]

Well I'm a Jew, but relate to a degree. I give to organizations that mean a lot to me and they only have to ask once a year if that. I want to give when we can afford it. If I get repeated requests it annoys me. I was particularly annoyed when our Temple told a sob story about hard times and the economy to get us to donate after we had a terrible experience with their school. Plus, I thought the whole place had become too fancy and showy and I didn't want to reinforce that. I like a simple and humble place of woirship myself.

[Anonymous]

I'm a non Christian who looked at the thread because I was wondering why you were telling us to stay away...

I think sending a vindictive email bashing him for putting you on his mailing list and asking you for money would be a bit over the top. Chances are he has no idea if you are a member or attend his church or not (especially if it is a large church) and you just so happened to be on the mailing list along with everyone else.

If you are not interested in that church and do not want to be on their mailing list, respond (nicely) by telling them that you only visited the church once and you're not interested in joining and ask them to kindly remove you from their mailing list.

[jsteele]

Apparently some posters didn't pay attention to my post. As a result, several posts have been deleted. I think my post was pretty clear. But, if further clarification is required, please use the thread in Website Feedback.

[Anonymous]

Op - I have done a lot of church shopping and have never gotten a 'welcome, would you like to donate letter'! Given it was personal and addressed you all by name I would absolutely respond. Either by email if you feel you can make the tone sound right or even better with a phone call. I wouldn't suggest it was an error - given it had your names there was intention. I would call and say "I was surprised to see a request for money after my first visit to the church" and let them explain their position. Respond honestly throughout, thank them for their time and let that be the end. If the pastor is a man of God he will receive the feedback in the manner it was intended (not an attack on him or his church but as aspect of his church practice to reflect on).

[Anonymous]

Some churches are like that. I've heard that in order to be a member, Mclean Bible church requires you to tithe AND you have to turn in your W-2 forms to prove you are really giving 15%.

Places that are all about the money need to be skipped.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some churches are like that. I've heard that in order to be a member, Mclean Bible church requires you to tithe AND you have to turn in your W-2 forms to prove you are really giving 15%.

Places that are all about the money need to be skipped.

Wow....I've heard stories, but always thought they were myths. I could never attend a church that did this. I agree, SKIP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Send a nice letter letting him know there must be a mixup in his mailing lists, since you are nit a member. And that you thought he'd like to know. Be polite. It may have been a mixup and he'd appreciate your letter. Or it was intentional and he'll get your point.

I agree with this. I think you'd be doing them/ him a favor.

[Anonymous]

I don't find the letter to be offensive at all. Churches provide a LOT of services to members, visitors, and the community as a whole. You are welcome to join the parish or not -- and you probably shouldn't if you feel this vehemently against the pastor already. But the reality is that churches have a bottom line and they NEED to raise money and collect a certain amount to operate. if you don't agree with the church's practices, you are fine to leave. but chiding the pastor is not going to get you anywhere.

- former 7th day adventist, baptized episcopalian in college, and now catholic convert.