What’s your end goal?

[Anonymous]

The end goal is to support my kids and encourage their realistic goals in the sport. My oldest wanted to play on their high school soccer team, which has a ton of athletes and soccer is pretty cut throat. My older daughter recently decided that playing high school is her goal too. My 9 year old wants to be professional soccer player, ha ha, so I imagine her goals will shift as she gets older.

[Anonymous]

There was no end goal to start other than a healthy well adjusted hound adult. The roads make themselves as dictated by the driver - your child. Some will take the early exits and pursue other things, others later and some till the road ends. Focus on them having fun and a passion for something and some life skills. Think of different destinations from pro (very far fetched) to playing in college perhaps to a school they’d have marginal chance otherwise to just enjoying high school sports or hanging with friends doing something they love. Your kid will tell you if they want more and then they will show you with follow through. Just like music or chess or anything else. Just make sure they are happy doing it and enjoy the ride however long u9 becomes 18 in a blink

[Anonymous]

My end goal is for my kid to go pro, but not MLS, any top European team instead…. Hopefully one that is at least top ranked. I’m fine if he makes the US National team also. If he’s too young to go pro, then it looks like a D1 school, and again, not just any D1 school, but one that is top ranked. Also, he wears a hat that says “Elite”, but this one is extra special since it’s all upper case letters and is in italics.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My end goal is for my kid to go pro, but not MLS, any top European team instead…. Hopefully one that is at least top ranked. I’m fine if he makes the US National team also. If he’s too young to go pro, then it looks like a D1 school, and again, not just any D1 school, but one that is top ranked. Also, he wears a hat that says “Elite”, but this one is extra special since it’s all upper case letters and is in italics.

Perhaps an opportunity to consider why feelings and reflection are so uncomfortable that you turn to snark and deflection. Feel free to skim past in the future, instead of trying to spin a conversation negative.

[Anonymous]

Corporate training

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My end goal is for my kid to go pro, but not MLS, any top European team instead…. Hopefully one that is at least top ranked. I’m fine if he makes the US National team also. If he’s too young to go pro, then it looks like a D1 school, and again, not just any D1 school, but one that is top ranked. Also, he wears a hat that says “Elite”, but this one is extra special since it’s all upper case letters and is in italics.

Perhaps an opportunity to consider why feelings and reflection are so uncomfortable that you turn to snark and deflection. Feel free to skim past in the future, instead of trying to spin a conversation negative.

Not that poster but he is not wrong at all. He just used snark to say what most people are not saying.

For example, you mention a program like ODP. It will get trashed on here. We did it and did not even tell anybody so we did not have to hear all of the negativity. Yes, the level is below what he faced in club but he was introduced to journaling and growth mindset by a coach, learned versatility and how to adapt to kids from other walks of life around the state, developed leadership and maturity, and learned many things tactically he never learned in club. Many qualities of developing a high quality human but because it is no longer an “elite” pathway with status, it is no longer considered “worthy” by the current youth soccer status quo.

[Anonymous]

Careful now, the experts here at DCUM don't like any mention of ODP....

[Anonymous]

My goal is to spend thousands of dollars and countless hours while someone lies to me about how my son “really could” play D1. In the process, together, my son and I will neglect his studies, miss major and minor childhood milestones, and rack up a few injuries along the way. He’ll also be mistreated by an alleged semi pro washout who acts like a child himself while taking credit for every ounce of “development” and accepting zero responsibility for any perceived or actual shortcomings.

Then, if he’s lucky, my son too can become just like that coach, babbling platitudes and buzzwords like development, character, and grit while hustling from one side gig to the next to supplement the income from his actual/alleged 9 to 5.

Either that or he can become a sarcastic and all but embittered old fart like his old man!

[Anonymous]

DD wants to play at the highest collegiate level that she can while also pursuing desired degree. Not sure if that’s D1,2,3 etc..Are your club coaches/directors helping you all with realistic expectations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My goal is to spend thousands of dollars and countless hours while someone lies to me about how my son “really could” play D1. In the process, together, my son and I will neglect his studies, miss major and minor childhood milestones, and rack up a few injuries along the way. He’ll also be mistreated by an alleged semi pro washout who acts like a child himself while taking credit for every ounce of “development” and accepting zero responsibility for any perceived or actual shortcomings.

Then, if he’s lucky, my son too can become just like that coach, babbling platitudes and buzzwords like development, character, and grit while hustling from one side gig to the next to supplement the income from his actual/alleged 9 to 5.

Either that or he can become a sarcastic and all but embittered old fart like his old man!

This post gave me butterflies in stomach

[Anonymous]

The dream was college soccer. Reality looks more like club or maybe D3, and that's okay. Unless you're in an MLS Next academy or just exceptional, the path to college ball is brutally narrow, and international competition makes it even harder.

He's been in the MLS Next environment, works hard every day, and we're pushing for it. But if it doesn't happen, we walk away with the best memories, real discipline, and resilience that will carry him further than any roster spot ever could.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My end goal is for my kid to go pro, but not MLS, any top European team instead…. Hopefully one that is at least top ranked. I’m fine if he makes the US National team also. If he’s too young to go pro, then it looks like a D1 school, and again, not just any D1 school, but one that is top ranked. Also, he wears a hat that says “Elite”, but this one is extra special since it’s all upper case letters and is in italics.

Perhaps an opportunity to consider why feelings and reflection are so uncomfortable that you turn to snark and deflection. Feel free to skim past in the future, instead of trying to spin a conversation negative.

American Psycho lol!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD wants to play at the highest collegiate level that she can while also pursuing desired degree. Not sure if that’s D1,2,3 etc..Are your club coaches/directors helping you all with realistic expectations.

Girls is so different from boys. The odds for girls are so much better. More D1 teams and less players vying. And far less international players as well. With that said, I have a son so I can’t answer your question accurately for girls. For DS, we didn’t pursue MLS Next or ECNL. He played at the top level of USYS on a very strong team. His clubs didn’t talk college recruiting when younger. His last club does place players every year and they began the discussions sophomore year. And it was all kind of vague. They were very transparent about where former players went and we could see it was mostly D2 and D3. Nobody was promised anything but they were wonderful about supporting the dream and helping where possible. He did have a GK coach tell him he’d be able to play D1 but DS was smart enough to see through that. Any club or coach suggesting D1 for a boy is trying to sell you something. The only way I’d trust that feedback from an individual/club is if there was no monetary relationship at all. For your DD, there is hope though. DS’s ex-gf is playing D1 and she played EDP National league until 10th and GA in 11th when she was recruited. So girls do make it who have the talent even if they don’t play ECNL. By the same token, we know lots of ECNL girls who didn’t get recruited D1. It’s about individual talent and marketing yourself more than the team you play on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD wants to play at the highest collegiate level that she can while also pursuing desired degree. Not sure if that’s D1,2,3 etc..Are your club coaches/directors helping you all with realistic expectations.

Girls is so different from boys. The odds for girls are so much better. More D1 teams and less players vying. And far less international players as well. With that said, I have a son so I can’t answer your question accurately for girls. For DS, we didn’t pursue MLS Next or ECNL. He played at the top level of USYS on a very strong team. His clubs didn’t talk college recruiting when younger. His last club does place players every year and they began the discussions sophomore year. And it was all kind of vague. They were very transparent about where former players went and we could see it was mostly D2 and D3. Nobody was promised anything but they were wonderful about supporting the dream and helping where possible. He did have a GK coach tell him he’d be able to play D1 but DS was smart enough to see through that. Any club or coach suggesting D1 for a boy is trying to sell you something. The only way I’d trust that feedback from an individual/club is if there was no monetary relationship at all. For your DD, there is hope though. DS’s ex-gf is playing D1 and she played EDP National league until 10th and GA in 11th when she was recruited. So girls do make it who have the talent even if they don’t play ECNL. By the same token, we know lots of ECNL girls who didn’t get recruited D1. It’s about individual talent and marketing yourself more than the team you play on.

I have both kids playing in top leagues and this is accurate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD wants to play at the highest collegiate level that she can while also pursuing desired degree. Not sure if that’s D1,2,3 etc..Are your club coaches/directors helping you all with realistic expectations.

Good question. Playing in college really didn't start to solidify for my DD until she was in 9th grade and it started to seem realistic. And then sophomore year became really all about making that happen. The club was pretty good about helping with realistic expectations. Before her sophomore year season (U16), the coach asked her to put together a list of schools she was interested in attending and group them into 3 categories. I can play there, it's a stretch and it's a dream school. They went through it together and it helped guide her as she started to put together her plans. The list changed as the year evolved and more information was gathered.

The coach and director were also helpful in answering questions and giving feedback. The coach would pass along what he was hearing from college coaches in the sense of, College of ABC reached out and asked about you. I would expect to hear from them on June 15. The director was a good sounding board because of their experience - they seemed to know everyone in the college coaching community. Better information and feedback was received if they were asked specific questions and they were willing to answer them.

Overall, while it was a lot of time and effort and did create some stressful times, my DD ended up at a good spot and is looking forward to her last year of club soccer next year and getting to college.