No proposal/ring on Valentines Day

[Anonymous]

My mom gave my dad an ultimatum and next month they will celebrate 50 years of marriage. Some people need them. My dad admits he would have waited years and years without the nudge.

It wasn’t meant to be. It’s best she found that out sooner rather than later!

[Anonymous]

February is the time of year with lots of seasonal depression. The daughter was probably depressed with the winter. It’s ironic the ultimatum not only didn’t work, it fired back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:FWIW, every couple I know that got engaged after an ultimatum on timing eventually divorced.

Well I’ll be the counter argument. I gave dh an ultimatum- engaged after 3.5 years or I was going to leave. Dh and I were beyond obsessed with each other and were a perfect couple. We knew we were supposed to be together.

In his defense, Dh said he hadn’t realized how much time had passed. He said he’d just been happy. He later said he was glad I pushed for marriage.

We’ve had such a happy marriage and life together. 15 years this fall.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ultimatum sounds bad, but communicating is good. This is important to me. I would like -this- for my life.

Right! This is where I want to be and if you don’t want to be there with me, then I need to find the person who wants to be with me.

[Anonymous]

Only your daughter knows. Allow her that.

[Anonymous]

If your daughter wanted to get married to him, then she could have proposed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If your daughter wanted to get married to him, then she could have proposed.

Do women put a ring on it now?

[Anonymous]

Good for her. If she knew marriage was a priority and a goal for her, and communicated that, it was on him to break it off if he didn’t share that goal or see that happening. Two years is more than enough time. Too bad she wasted time on him, but good for her for moving on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your daughter wanted to get married to him, then she could have proposed.

Do women put a ring on it now?

This is such an idiotic question, and idiotic phrasing.

[Anonymous]

If in 2 years she felt she wanted to marry the BF and he was still unsure, why would she continue wasting time on him? The right man will know pretty quickly she is the one for him. Why would any of you think this is a problem.

[Anonymous]

I think she made the right move. Tell her to grab a new plate!

[Anonymous]

Depends how old and mature they are.

If you’re in your late twenties and dating more than two years without plans to get married (assuming someone wants to get married), you’re wasting your time. Really you should start having those conversations around 12-18 months in to gauge how serious you are about each other.

[Anonymous]

Good for her. I gave my ex an ultimatum, the date passed, I stuck around three more years issuing more ultimatums. When I finally had enough and was getting ready to leave, he got a cheap ring and practically threw it at me. Few months later I found out he was cheating.

Always better to leave if they miss the ultimatum. Or better yet, if you need to issue one at all, just end it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your daughter wanted to get married to him, then she could have proposed.

Do women put a ring on it now?

This is such an idiotic question, and idiotic phrasing.

Why? Do women propose in 2026?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If your daughter wanted to get married to him, then she could have proposed.

NP. My dh would absolutely have said no to this. He's not super traditional either or conservative, but he definitely had ideas for proposals.