These are flawed analogies. True ADHD is always there; it doesn’t suddenly pop up at 18. Yes, ADHD can go undiagnosed, but real, untreated ADHD leaves a trail of sorrow in its wake. The idea that a kid comes from an ADHD family, yet their ADHD went unnoticed is highly improbable because both parents and doctors would be alert to it. |
| This is a common loophole. My kids actually had ADHD and anxiety but their immigrant mama didn't know about possible accommodations, unlike moms who went knew and manipulated the system. Fortunately mine did well on their own but had to work much harder and go through unnecessary stress, all their academic lives. |
If this is so endemically true, why would you want to send your kid there? The implication is that it is a lot of cheaters who are abusing drugs. I’m not sure that is where I’d want my kid to spend their formative years. |
If your gastroenterologist found malignant polyps during routine colonoscopy, would you refuse removal of the malignant polyps because it hasn't gone full blown cancerous yet? Mental health is real, just like physical health. |
Oh wow sounds like a kid with a disabling neurodevelopmental condition that arises in childhood! lol. I give up. |
That is a really dumb analogy. ADHD is not like cancer or low vision. If it exists, you cannot get through a demanding high school with all As, top scores, and admission to an elite university. |
Are you suggesting a kid couldn’t make it through academically if they needed glasses? I think the thing you missing is that sometimes kids compensate in different ways, like in the glasses analogy might squint, or happen to sit in the front of the class. Having blurry vision is all they know. Then something happens at some age where suddenly they discover in fact there is a better way to approach the world. Glasses take away their headaches. And now they can sit anywhere in the room and thrive. And they can start to drive more safely. Just because it was diagnosed late doesn’t mean the condition didn’t always exist. Should we not give glasses to people who survived well enough without them, even if their life can be significantly improved with glasses? |
+1. If you have never seen actual “high functioning” ADHD consider yourself lucky. It means always being on the edge of failure and sometimes going over with catastrophic impacts. Success means getting into a niche where the intelligence is valued by employers such that they overlook the very real deficits. Not everyone gets there. The person I know like this flunked college twice, washed out as a professor because they couldn’t produce, fired more than once, criminal record due to carelessness, multiple failed relationships due to inability to handle day to day life. |
Sorry, but this isn’t ADHD. You didn’t provide any behavior or outcome basis to suggest a problem, so maybe it’s anxiety. A kid who feels he must be perfect and fears that the slightest imperfection might wreck the whole card deck is going to be anxious. |
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My kid was diagnosed with ADHD in second grade. By high school, he had mostly stopped medication because stimulants worsened his (severe) anxiety and difficulty eating and sleeping. He also worked to cancel the extra time accommodations for SAT and AP tests because sitting in a testing room without eating or moving around for 6 hours wasn’t practical for him. By college, he no longer had ADHD prescriptions, but still dealt with severe anxiety and difficulty sleeping (often went days without sleeping at all as a freshman, and when he’d come home for breaks, he looked awful).
I’m sure there are wealthy people who abuse diagnoses. There are also people who do have ADHD who make different choices (meds vs no meds, accommodations vs none). I tend to withhold judgement because I’m aware that sometimes people are choosing between multiple bad options. FWIW, DC was a good student and a standout athlete in HS, attended an “elite” SLAC, graduated summa and with honors and is now applying to grad school. Being able to achieve stuff doesn’t mean kids aren’t dealing with real symptoms. |
By definition ADHD is supposed to be evident before 12 and must cause some kind of clinical impact. It just beggars belief that a kid would be fully successful then suddenly have a neurological disability when they start college. |
+1. Or it is the parents who cannot tolerate any imperfection in a child. |
He sounds like he has severe anxiety, not ADHD …. |
Your kid is saying they have ADHD because they like how adderall feels. They just want access to amphetamines. |
| Majority on adderall do not need it. Just a bunch of addicts that like the high. |