Has anyone hired an aide when parent/LO in hospital?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When someone is in the hospital, the visitors should be kept to an absolute minimum. No family needs to be there. They get in the way. The hospital staff will call if they need to discuss anything. An aide would only get in the way, and they may not release info to an aide.

Not necessarily true. While I've had my fair share of unhelpful families, and have even had to have some removed, most don't get in the way at all. And for patients with cognitive impairment, having a family member there often leads to a better stay. They are less scared, calmer, and more likely to participate in therapy and take their meds.

[Anonymous]

Hire through an agency. They can have a CNA show up tomorrow. Price will be at least $35 per hour.

[Anonymous]

OP I haven't done this, but wanted to.

Here's an example of a company I found in the DC area that says they can provide this:

https://www.specialtycareservices.com/hospital-sitter-bedside-companion

[Anonymous]

I would think that hiring someone with RN experience, for 8 hours a day, would be very expensive, and not really what you need, assuming that family members are close by and reachable on the phone.

What you really are looking for is just someone reasonably sensible, able to sit fairly quietly and amuse themselves, able to communicate well with the patient and also with hospital staff; someone familiar with hospitals, probably because they have had family members who needed care themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Many good suggestions here.

1. As others said ask the hospital.

2. Call a care agency.

3. You will encounter a problem in having a non family member communicate with doctors or medical professionals sharing information with this person. HIPPS type things.

4. The person will not be able to provide "care" as the person does not have privileges. The person can make sure the patient is comfortable and needs are being met.

5. I totally understand not wanting to leave a person who cannot communicate in the hospital alone. Sounds a bit odd but hear me out.

You need someone attentive and who can listen and send notes/updates. Do you know any responsible college students home at break? Any retired nurses or teachers? Teachers on winter break? Do you belong to a church or synagogue, maybe there?

I know these ideas may sound silly but just trying to help. My mom was a teacher and always hired other young teachers to stay in here house and pet sit over the summer.

We looked into this when my dh was recovering from major open heart surgery surgery. It could have been bc he was in a higher level ward of the hospital, but it was a nightmare as far as hipaa and getting the drs to actually share info with an aid.
If the tbi patient is in a stepped down unit enough that they can have visitors anytime, are you sure they actually need someone there all the time? I’d step back and see if the family members haven’t gotten in too much of a routine and actually think it’s necessary when it’s not. I have seen this happen with other relatives. Perhaps they could just pin down when the drs do the rounds and when updates are given, generally at shift changes or specific times. If it’s a safety issue, then the hospital should provide someone. It also sounds like there’s not an end date for this and they probably shouldn’t get into cumbersome arrangements or this will just cause more stress for them.
In nyc, care.com is actually very good for things like this, but expect to pay at least $40/hr.
Some of the companies that provide baby nurses also provide eldercare. Unsure if it’s gone up, but it was around $350/nt.

[Anonymous]

I've been a friend/family member who sat and visited with hospitalized people (not just as a simple visit, but as the person who stays with them and advocates for them). In my experience, as long as the patient is conscious themselves, it's no problem getting information from doctors and nurses, no matter who you are. If the patient is unconscious or sedated, then you may run into issues.

Someone with TBI might be having difficulty expressing themselves and making their needs known. They could be confused, disoriented. A busy hospital staff doesn't have time to tend to their comfort, especially if they cannot express themself well. It would make sense for family members to not want to leave this person to fend for him or herself most hours of the day.

[Anonymous]

This is absolutely reasonable and a good idea of the patient has a TBI. Typically someone with a TBI will be more impulsive and at higher risks for falls—hospital staff, no matter how attentive, will not be at the bedside 24/7 to eliminate this risk.

In terms of concerns that hospital staff will be less attentive because you have an aide, the opposite is typically true. Having someone at the bedside who can advocate for the patient increases accountability.

You can hire though an agency and describe attributes you’d prefer. I would also perhaps explore a private case manager to coordinate needs in the community and during transitions (in addition to the hospital discharge planner) as it seems that this patient likely has complex care needs.

[Anonymous]

Yes, we had to do this first my parent, who has dementia. Family took turns being present, but as they stays got longer in hospital and rehab, we found a trusted caregiver to be present and advocate if needed. It's a huge help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is absolutely reasonable and a good idea of the patient has a TBI. Typically someone with a TBI will be more impulsive and at higher risks for falls—hospital staff, no matter how attentive, will not be at the bedside 24/7 to eliminate this risk.

In terms of concerns that hospital staff will be less attentive because you have an aide, the opposite is typically true. Having someone at the bedside who can advocate for the patient increases accountability.

You can hire though an agency and describe attributes you’d prefer. I would also perhaps explore a private case manager to coordinate needs in the community and during transitions (in addition to the hospital discharge planner) as it seems that this patient likely has complex care needs.

This post has great advice. The side is witness and helps ensure they are attentive. If you can afford it a case manager is ideal to coordinate in hospital and after release.

Too often on this board people dont seem to understand family members have jobs to keep, spouses, kids and their own health to maintain. It’s unrealistic to think people can continue to divide it up and have family do it all and it’s a recipe for burnout, fights, resentment and their own health crisis from the stress. In the old days life was different and fewer people lived so impaired.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would think that hiring someone with RN experience, for 8 hours a day, would be very expensive, and not really what you need, assuming that family members are close by and reachable on the phone.

What you really are looking for is just someone reasonably sensible, able to sit fairly quietly and amuse themselves, able to communicate well with the patient and also with hospital staff; someone familiar with hospitals, probably because they have had family members who needed care themselves.

You described me. Too bad I don’t live in the area. I would do it and have actually thought about offering up myself for hire for this sort of thing. Kind of like a substitute daughter for a few hours at a time. I understand how hard it is from my own family experience and I like the idea of providing some comfort in this area via just eyes on and the ability to communicate.

I agree with a PP that there is the risk of less attention from staff when visitor is there because it’s somewhat covered. We experienced that with hired home care aides to sit in.

[Anonymous]

Yes. We hired aides. An agency sent them, and the two I remember were both excellent.

The man was an immigrant, though, so I don’t know if the US has kicked out everyone who would do this work.

In our case, the person was dying so this was more to give us a a break from 24-7.

I told them they could read or look at phones because of the situation. There was not much they could do.

One of the aides was there when our relative passed away.

[Anonymous]

OP - check into finding a care manager who is ALCA certified https://www.aginglifecare.org/ALCAWEB/ALCAWEB/What_is_Aging_Life_Care/Selecting_an_Aging_Life_Care_Professional.aspx

They won’t be the person who will sit 8 hours a day in the hospital but they will a) be a competent professional who can help take things off the family’s plate and b) be able to recommend the resources they need in the NYC area. We have a care manager in the DC area for my Dad and she is a godsend.

[Anonymous]

Yes but not more than 4 hrs a day. She was paid in cash (she is my friend). She would make sure the patient isn’t left in wheelchair for hours and that his diapers are changed. The food was abysmal so she would bring food even though the clueless spouse didn’t compensate or provide any food.