Can I say this in a wedding speech?

Anonymous wrote:Im giving a speech at my cousin's (massive) wedding soon. He grew up with a dead beat dad that left very early and never had any custody or paid child support, just randomly dropped in to manipulate and restir up abandonment trauma for the kids every so often.

My cousin put himself in therapy at 18, just made partner at his firm, is the BEST dad who constantly researches parenting and studies and learned to be emotionally available and Im just so insanely proud of him from where he came from.

Can I say something like "it has been an honor watching you grow into the person you needed" or "what a feat to put in 20 years of self work to make yourself the person your kid and wife deserve"

The deadbeat dad will be at the wedding.

You can say “It takes such rare strength of character to lead oneself into being the man you have become. I know that X and CHILD already benefit from that aspect of you, and will keep doing so. I am so proud to call you not only a cousin but also a friend.”

report

12/06/2025 15:40

Subject: Can I say this in a wedding speech?

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:My mom is wired to say things about how far you've come without sensitivity for time/place. She is so sincere in her intent but ive seen people (and have been hurt) by it. Imagine on graduation day when you are proud and happy, her sharing a painful and private moment. "Remember when you were going to drop out freshman year!! You did it! Cheers to the graduate!"

No everyone there knows this history. Say what you want to directly, but up there focus on your admiration for him, not the circumstances.

This is my mom —except it’s regarding the six years I was sexually abused by a relative, among other things. She talked about the abuse at the reception dinner and how amazing it was that I was able to accept affection from a man.