Are you happy you moved from public to private?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Moved my first two in 9th and will do it with my last as well. Zero regrets. They were nervous and man their private school friends and teachers made them think that they were going to be entering a war zone by attending a public high school in Fairfax County.

After the first two days it was all fine. Public school gave them more friend groups, class choices and extracurricular activities. I think private did some things very well (Science not one of them),prepared them to be better writers, know how to study, etc. But the one thing that they have said to me is the worse teachers in high school, the ones everyone hates are not that different from the mid-level private school teachers they had. They told me private school prepared them to deal with difficult teachers and that really hit home.

In two years at public and some 20 something teachers they have had one "bad" one which they said would have been normal at private school. For the most part they think that the quality of the teaching is much better in public.

Since they are 15 and 16 now, I think that they are old enough to make an informed opinion and I value it. No regrets.

The question was public to private, NOT private to public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Moved in 2nd grade due to COVID to a K-8. Very happy with smaller class sizes, actually differentiated instruction, socio-emotional learning, overall school environment.

DD is in middle school now and the small overall class size can be difficult from a social perspective. We are planning on public for high school.

How many kids are in her class?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. I am not happy. We made the move in middle school because middle school is just a hard few years socially and emotionally for all tweens. We figured private might offer a bit of a "safer" space for all the physical and emotional changes that kids are going through at that age. I suppose that was true. However, we made the choice to stay for upper school and this I very much regret. Public schools on the whole has much more to offer academically and for extra curriculars. I also don't think the "bubble" that exists with most private schools prepares you for college and beyond. And of course there's the financial investment. It's not worth the money. The problem is that once you start in private upper school it can be a pain to transfer back to public just in terms of requirements. For example, we looked into transferring at the end of 10th grade and because our private counts sports as P.E. our kid would have had to take PE in public in lieu of other more interesting electives. Also, our private does the science sequencing different than public schools so our kid would have been an 11th grader taking science with 9th graders in public. It just all seemed like a pain to switch at that point.

Are you willing to say which school you went to? We are applying to a few privates this year and while certainly they are not as expansive or diverse as public, they seem like they have plenty of academic and extracurricular opportunities. Our local public also seems good, so if we get acceptances, we'll have a real choice to make.

[Anonymous]

Moved both kids when my oldest was in 3rd. They're about to finish MS and will likely move back to public. It was absolutely the right decision for lower and middle school, but for high school public seems like it will be a better fit for them for a number of reasons. The younger one will likely be a lifer. Just different kids.

[Anonymous]

I am a huge fan of our public schools, but yes, we were happy with the move. It was a much calmer (and slower) social setting and better overall education. To be sure, both have flaws, and nothing is perfect. Nonetheless, we actually moved the youngers the year after our oldest started in private because we could not in good conscience leave them where there were fo rthe planned years after we experienced the difference.

I also came to appreciate the wider opportunities for extra curriculars -- things they would not have gotten to experience in a bigger environment. Looking back (they've all graduated), while the excellent education was obviously important, it was the rest of it (and these are absolutely things they could not have experienced otherwise) that really helped them find themselves and their interests and defined who they are today.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My parents switched me in 9th and was a huge improvement. As a result, my kids never set foot in a public school through 12th. The oldest did choose a state flagship and, contrary to one of the upstream posts, was plenty prepared to self-advocate and navigate the bureaucracy inherent in those institutions. If you have the money, private is nearly always the best choice.

Same. I went to a “top” school and it was so bad, starkly different from the private I transferred to. It impacted my decision to send my kids to private all the way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My parents switched me in 9th and was a huge improvement. As a result, my kids never set foot in a public school through 12th. The oldest did choose a state flagship and, contrary to one of the upstream posts, was plenty prepared to self-advocate and navigate the bureaucracy inherent in those institutions. If you have the money, private is nearly always the best choice.

Private schools vary widely in this areas as do publics. The very good public HS (and I mean like the top five in either side or the river; not DCPS) beat out academically most of the mediocre private schools because we as taxpayers spend a lot on our educational systems and the base of families in the zones tend to be rich and very very educated. That being said, we live in one of those HS zones and we chose a Big3 and we did so for academic reasons.

Rational people send their kids to privates all the time so the kid can make the sports teams or can get 1:1 daily oversight on whether they are turning in their homework or just so they can be around other kids who pay for school and that social set is important to the parents. But I think it’s a really big stretch to say that private is “almost always” better than public. Frankly, I thought the kids who left our really affluent public ES for private were generally weird kids who had some difficulty and required extra attention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents switched me in 9th and was a huge improvement. As a result, my kids never set foot in a public school through 12th. The oldest did choose a state flagship and, contrary to one of the upstream posts, was plenty prepared to self-advocate and navigate the bureaucracy inherent in those institutions. If you have the money, private is nearly always the best choice.

Private schools vary widely in this areas as do publics. The very good public HS (and I mean like the top five in either side or the river; not DCPS) beat out academically most of the mediocre private schools because we as taxpayers spend a lot on our educational systems and the base of families in the zones tend to be rich and very very educated. That being said, we live in one of those HS zones and we chose a Big3 and we did so for academic reasons.

Rational people send their kids to privates all the time so the kid can make the sports teams or can get 1:1 daily oversight on whether they are turning in their homework or just so they can be around other kids who pay for school and that social set is important to the parents. But I think it’s a really big stretch to say that private is “almost always” better than public. Frankly, I thought the kids who left our really affluent public ES for private were generally weird kids who had some difficulty and required extra attention.

This was the case in our mostly affluent public ES too. A lot of the quirkier kids and some who had learning differences went to smaller schools. Then there was a certain group of parents who are not super wealthy but were intent on private schools and put their kids there in middle school.

[Anonymous]

Depends on the private. Some yes, others marginally better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depends on the private. Some yes, others marginally better.

It is naive to say that. People have very specific reasons for choosing a school that make it worth the tuition for them. The reasons vary a lot from kid to kid, but every parent has decided those reasons are worth the tuition. Not all kids are the same, or need the same things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Both kids went the private for high school after mostly very good experiences in DCPS (and a DC charter school).

I don't love the money we spent (and they went to Catholic schools so while it was big money it wasn't BIG money) and wish we had more family vacations, but overall it was the bettter choice for both, for different reasons.

DC 1 went to SJC for the Benilde program, providig supports for mild learning issues

DC 2 went to a more academic Catholic school and did very well.

I was talking with some friends who had kids in DCPS one day when I suddenly realized that private school had really removed a stressor from my life. I can't describe what it was, precisely, but dealing with the school was just easier, more straightforward, fewer days off to juggle, fewer regular money/fundraiser stress, nicer facilities. I have long been a vocal supporter of DCPS and treasure the time spent in elementary and middle school, kids had wonderful teachers, made lifelong friends (the kids and also us parents) but somehow not dealing with DCPS was just.... a relief of pressure I didn't even realize we had.

Thanks for putting this into words. I feel the same - we have kids in DCPS (elementary and finishing middle) and our oldest has applied private for HS. I am sad to leave DCPS (if she gets in and chooses to) in some ways, but when I imagine how much less space in my brain I will have to dedicate to pushing this boulder up a hill - the advocacy, the emailing, the budget crises, all of it - I sense I will feel relieved. Not a reason to do it, but a nice side effect if it happens. I am very much stressed about the $$, however.

[Anonymous]

The public/private analysis will be different for each family - and usually for each child. A big factor is which specific public HS and which specific private.

As a contrived example, one's analysis might vary (for otherwise identical students), if one were zoned for Langley or Oakton and the other were zoned for West Potomac or Edison.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Both kids went the private for high school after mostly very good experiences in DCPS (and a DC charter school).

I don't love the money we spent (and they went to Catholic schools so while it was big money it wasn't BIG money) and wish we had more family vacations, but overall it was the bettter choice for both, for different reasons.

DC 1 went to SJC for the Benilde program, providig supports for mild learning issues

DC 2 went to a more academic Catholic school and did very well.

I was talking with some friends who had kids in DCPS one day when I suddenly realized that private school had really removed a stressor from my life. I can't describe what it was, precisely, but dealing with the school was just easier, more straightforward, fewer days off to juggle, fewer regular money/fundraiser stress, nicer facilities. I have long been a vocal supporter of DCPS and treasure the time spent in elementary and middle school, kids had wonderful teachers, made lifelong friends (the kids and also us parents) but somehow not dealing with DCPS was just.... a relief of pressure I didn't even realize we had.

Thanks for putting this into words. I feel the same - we have kids in DCPS (elementary and finishing middle) and our oldest has applied private for HS. I am sad to leave DCPS (if she gets in and chooses to) in some ways, but when I imagine how much less space in my brain I will have to dedicate to pushing this boulder up a hill - the advocacy, the emailing, the budget crises, all of it - I sense I will feel relieved. Not a reason to do it, but a nice side effect if it happens. I am very much stressed about the $$, however.

Just FYI…I don’t quite understand what PP means when she says the “regular fundraiser/money stress” at SJC vs DCPS is gone.

There will be fairly often fundraising emails and various club (and off season sports training fees) fees at a school like SJC. You can obviously ignore the fundraising fees (but not the club or sports fees).

Having a kid at both SJC and DCPS for HS, there isn’t much difference from that perspective…and actually the HSA fundraising pleas for DCPS HS are quite minimal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents switched me in 9th and was a huge improvement. As a result, my kids never set foot in a public school through 12th. The oldest did choose a state flagship and, contrary to one of the upstream posts, was plenty prepared to self-advocate and navigate the bureaucracy inherent in those institutions. If you have the money, private is nearly always the best choice.

Private schools vary widely in this areas as do publics. The very good public HS (and I mean like the top five in either side or the river; not DCPS) beat out academically most of the mediocre private schools because we as taxpayers spend a lot on our educational systems and the base of families in the zones tend to be rich and very very educated. That being said, we live in one of those HS zones and we chose a Big3 and we did so for academic reasons.

Rational people send their kids to privates all the time so the kid can make the sports teams or can get 1:1 daily oversight on whether they are turning in their homework or just so they can be around other kids who pay for school and that social set is important to the parents. But I think it’s a really big stretch to say that private is “almost always” better than public. Frankly, I thought the kids who left our really affluent public ES for private were generally weird kids who had some difficulty and required extra attention.

For me it was a "W" school to a MoCo independent school (by choice). My sibling stayed in public (also by choice) and received an inferior education.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents switched me in 9th and was a huge improvement. As a result, my kids never set foot in a public school through 12th. The oldest did choose a state flagship and, contrary to one of the upstream posts, was plenty prepared to self-advocate and navigate the bureaucracy inherent in those institutions. If you have the money, private is nearly always the best choice.

Private schools vary widely in this areas as do publics. The very good public HS (and I mean like the top five in either side or the river; not DCPS) beat out academically most of the mediocre private schools because we as taxpayers spend a lot on our educational systems and the base of families in the zones tend to be rich and very very educated. That being said, we live in one of those HS zones and we chose a Big3 and we did so for academic reasons.

Rational people send their kids to privates all the time so the kid can make the sports teams or can get 1:1 daily oversight on whether they are turning in their homework or just so they can be around other kids who pay for school and that social set is important to the parents. But I think it’s a really big stretch to say that private is “almost always” better than public. Frankly, I thought the kids who left our really affluent public ES for private were generally weird kids who had some difficulty and required extra attention.

For me it was a "W" school to a MoCo independent school (by choice). My sibling stayed in public (also by choice) and received an inferior education.

Does that really matter in the grand scheme? Are you claiming your sibling is less successful in life because they stayed at a “W” school?