Eliminating screen time

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are your kids allowed to use screens on playdates?

Not at my house. There are some kids' houses I know DS will be playing video games at the whole time or be on the ipad. Sometimes I stay there to chat with parent (at parent's invitation) to help monitor and also limit the playdate to a shorter time. Other kids, like neighbors, I know their kids aren't on screens and I let DS run amok with them outside (again, keeping an eye on things).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think I am doing OK with screen time. They get cartoons before school, movies with parents, and a curated video game collection. No Roblox or anything with chat, no tablets, no youtube as its disabled on the tv. If I feel they've played enough I make them turn it off and they do something else.
Even with this liberal policy, my boys (10 and almost 8) get "roasted" for being left out of group chats, roblox, youtube nonsense and so on and are not well included socially. They get along best with the evangelical home school kids in the neighborhood who are similarly sheltered.

Can I ask which neighborhood (or maybe even which school?) you/ your son are in? And how old? I am surprised about the inclusion issue because you do have a pretty liberal policy already and I am wondering if we are currently more sheltered somehow. We are in Takoma park (5th grade son goes to piney branch elementary). DS has zero screen during the week, no Roblox, no YouTube, just curated video games (1h max on WE) and movies with family or friends over the WE. And he is absolutely not left out even though some families have more liberal screen policies. He doesn’t know the famous you tubers or memes but it is not a big coolness factor.

I am afraid it will come later in middle school though, when a critical mass of his friends will spend their WE gaming online and he will feel left out

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think I am doing OK with screen time. They get cartoons before school, movies with parents, and a curated video game collection. No Roblox or anything with chat, no tablets, no youtube as its disabled on the tv. If I feel they've played enough I make them turn it off and they do something else.
Even with this liberal policy, my boys (10 and almost 8) get "roasted" for being left out of group chats, roblox, youtube nonsense and so on and are not well included socially. They get along best with the evangelical home school kids in the neighborhood who are similarly sheltered.

Can I ask which neighborhood (or maybe even which school?) you/ your son are in? And how old? I am surprised about the inclusion issue because you do have a pretty liberal policy already and I am wondering if we are currently more sheltered somehow. We are in Takoma park (5th grade son goes to piney branch elementary). DS has zero screen during the week, no Roblox, no YouTube, just curated video games (1h max on WE) and movies with family or friends over the WE. And he is absolutely not left out even though some families have more liberal screen policies. He doesn’t know the famous you tubers or memes but it is not a big coolness factor.

I am afraid it will come later in middle school though, when a critical mass of his friends will spend their WE gaming online and he will feel left out

We live outside Chicago in a middle class area but I send my kids to a Catholic school in a wealthy area. The parents talk a big talk about reducing screen time and not handing out phones too early but ultimately seem to care more about having popular kids.
It doesn't help that my boys aren't skilled athletes, and that the boy cohort at our school is very small and very sports-focused. They'd probably have more friends at a large school with some fellow nerds but I really like the low-tech education they are getting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think I am doing OK with screen time. They get cartoons before school, movies with parents, and a curated video game collection. No Roblox or anything with chat, no tablets, no youtube as its disabled on the tv. If I feel they've played enough I make them turn it off and they do something else.
Even with this liberal policy, my boys (10 and almost 8) get "roasted" for being left out of group chats, roblox, youtube nonsense and so on and are not well included socially. They get along best with the evangelical home school kids in the neighborhood who are similarly sheltered.

Can I ask which neighborhood (or maybe even which school?) you/ your son are in? And how old? I am surprised about the inclusion issue because you do have a pretty liberal policy already and I am wondering if we are currently more sheltered somehow. We are in Takoma park (5th grade son goes to piney branch elementary). DS has zero screen during the week, no Roblox, no YouTube, just curated video games (1h max on WE) and movies with family or friends over the WE. And he is absolutely not left out even though some families have more liberal screen policies. He doesn’t know the famous you tubers or memes but it is not a big coolness factor.

I am afraid it will come later in middle school though, when a critical mass of his friends will spend their WE gaming online and he will feel left out

We live outside Chicago in a middle class area but I send my kids to a Catholic school in a wealthy area. The parents talk a big talk about reducing screen time and not handing out phones too early but ultimately seem to care more about having popular kids.
It doesn't help that my boys aren't skilled athletes, and that the boy cohort at our school is very small and very sports-focused. They'd probably have more friends at a large school with some fellow nerds but I really like the low-tech education they are getting.

Wouldn’t sport focus mean less focus on screens though? In our area we mix with two separate groups due to my son’s activities. One is UMC and sport heavy and they have iPads but I don’t see a lot of screen time. They do seem spoiled with expensive sport activities, motorized scooters, expensive mountain bikes. Maybe there’s more screens going on at home that I don’t see. The other group is middle class to UMC and nerdy but they are very into gaming, coding, Roblox, and other nerd friendly activities. They don’t like being outside.