Did your parents physical appearance and dress ever embarrass or make you proud when you were a kid

[Anonymous]

My mom is overweight, which never bothered me in and of itself. What did bother me is when she chose clothing that was tight or low cut - it looked really bad and showed way too much.

[Anonymous]

I remember being embarrassed by mom mom because she wasn't as stylish as other moms I knew and was always a little overweight. Looking back, it was because she had gained so much weight after having me and my brother that she never really got back into fashion. Looking at older pics of her before she got married, she was always stylish and won "best dressed" her senior year of high school. She's 70 now and wears Chicos and J.Jill clothing which looks great on her. She knows how to dress for her body type now. My dad was always into the latest trend, clothing and music-wise. He went through the country phase in the late 70s, early 80s and embarrassed me by wearing 10-gallon hat (in the suburbs of NYC!). Mortifying!

I the best thing we can do for our kids is not wear anything too outrageous and try not to look like we don't care about our appearance. They're still going to be embarrassed by us to some capacity, though. What teenager isn't?

[Anonymous]

My mom was always one of the prettiest moms (and still is). I loved it and was so proud. I was very aware of how pretty she was. But it wasn't even so much a superficial thing. My mom was/is truly beautiful from the inside out and is so modest she has no clue how naturally stunning she is. She exudes sweet charm and inner beauty, even still. I loved that the other kids liked her, but moreso, I loved that the other kids saw what I saw. I was so in awe of my mother as a child. I still am.

[Anonymous]

I was very embarassed as a kid of my parents' appearance. My father was very overweight and loved to take us out to eat. He would often let us invite friends. The embarassing part was, he couldn't fit into booths and sometimes even regular tables were a problem if the restaurant was crowded. We always had to try out tables before we could settle on something. It would really embarass me when I had friends along. It never bothered my dad that he was overweight -- he was what he was, and he's a very gregarious person. I'm glad for that example now.

My mother was also heavy and built very disproportionate (think at least 4 sizes bigger in pants than in shirts). She dressed appropriately for her body most of the time, but in the summer she would wear her bathing suit most of the day despite the fact that she didn't keep her body hair under control and she had a lot of cellulite.

Wow, I sound like an awful person posting this. If it helps, I got over the embarassment. They are who they are! I am sure I will embarass my kids too.

[Anonymous]

We grew up poor, but my mother always looked appropriate and pulled together. It also helped that she remained and still is, thin. I learned that you don't need money to look good. Having been a scholarship student at a prep school, I also learned that money does not buy style.

[Anonymous]

Yes, my mother was very overweight by the time I was in H.S., and didn't dress fashionably. I was embarrassed about it until I was around 30, and at that time confident enough about myself that it didn't matter to me anymore.

[Anonymous]

I wasn't embarrassed by my parents dress or weight, though neither were stylish and my dad was overweight. But what embarrassed me was that they smoked. I was completely mortified by this and I hated that I would smell like smoke because they smoked in the house and the car.

[Anonymous]

Yes, then and sometimes now. My mom always wore VERY short skirts and low cut dresses to school functions -- I'm talking fairly scandalous looking stuff; sort of hoochie. She had the body for it, but I remember being red-faced as she'd show up to things like that. As she got older she gained weight and didn't change her style. She attended a cousin's wedding in a red, skin-tight, off the shoulder dress. I felt ashamed by how viscerally and negatively I reacted to what she was wearing. i didn't want to even get into any pictures with her and could not believe it. I was worried about what she'd wear to my wedding, but didn't want to be an ass. She's never had money, we've always had a strained relationship, so saying something would have been more worry than it was worth. However, she asked me what she should wear, so I told her the general style I thought would be nice and offered to pay for it. I had visions of us going shopping together, maybe bonding a bit, and having a TINY bit of say in what she wore. Well, she called me a few days later asking for my credit card and said she'd found "the dress" and wanted to buy it. She was at a bridal store so I figured it would be okay. It wasn't too bad, but it was sleeveless and tight, and she didn't even have it pressed off before the wedding; so she showed up looking a bit like she'd slept in it. Oh, and she wore a micro-mini to my rehearsal dinner. I have to say, though, whatever her body problems are, they don't include her legs. They're still pretty fab, so at least she had that going for her!

PS. I feel like a real cad for even writing this down. Sometimes I feel super guilty just for thinking it.

[Anonymous]

Yes, very much so. My parents were much much older than my friend's parents. They had me in their 40's, 30 years ago before it was the "norm". They were mistaken for my grandparents. Now that my father is gone, I so regret being embarrassed.

[Anonymous]

Yes... but then again my friends had moms who dressed fashionably and were younger and in shape and my friends were terribly embarrased by them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, very much so. My parents were much much older than my friend's parents. They had me in their 40's, 30 years ago before it was the "norm". They were mistaken for my grandparents. Now that my father is gone, I so regret being embarrassed.

Go easy on yourself. This is typical child behavior, so much so it is practically a cliche. I would not spend time regretting what you can't change - I'm sure you also brought your dad a lot of joy.

[Anonymous]

No. My father was 25 yrs older than my mother, and looked exactly like Robert Mitchum. (So much so, that when Robert Mitchum died and they showed it on TV, it startled me for an instant). Both my parents were well dressed and very attractive. My father passed away a few years ago, but he always looked good.

Both of my sons have made remarks that lead me to believe that it seems to matter to children how their parents look. And reading this thread certainly affirms that. They're both pretty young, but they say things along the lines of "i'm glad you're so pretty", etc. Both DH and I stay fit and pay attention to how we dress, but we don't really try to emphasize that. It must be somewhat innate for most people. Hopefully we'll keep from embarrasing them too much as we (and they) get older.

[Anonymous]

I was embarressed (and still am) how much my mom worries about looking good. When you are a kid, you think its weird an old person would care (because at the time, 30 seemed SO OLD). Now, I just wonder - how on earth is she still so darn shallow? Don't get me wrong, she's a good person, but man is she obsessed with looks.

[Anonymous]

I wasn't overly embarressed of my parents. There was a time or two when I realized they were a good 10-15 years older than the parents of my friends.

[Anonymous]

My mother was always one of the prettiest moms around, my friends always commented about it and they all wanted her to go on the school trips, etc. I *hated* that! Probably because she was prettier and more popular than I was then.