No recognition

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter was in this position which was not a huge deal but a bit unpleasant. I think the issue was she’s both an excellent student and very independent-never asked for help, did it seem to need encouragement, etc. I think sometimes teachers use discretionary awards for students they like or have made great strides, which is okay but it doesn’t feel great to feel invisible.

Also, the kid who got the kindness award is well known by the students to be a really mean kid, and that actually made her feel a little better.

This seems to be universal

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter was in this position which was not a huge deal but a bit unpleasant. I think the issue was she’s both an excellent student and very independent-never asked for help, did it seem to need encouragement, etc. I think sometimes teachers use discretionary awards for students they like or have made great strides, which is okay but it doesn’t feel great to feel invisible.

Also, the kid who got the kindness award is well known by the students to be a really mean kid, and that actually made her feel a little better.

This seems to be universal

+1, what gives with this "kindness" award or "good citizenship" award that so many schools give out? Thought many years of experience in both public and private schools, I have seen multiple kids who are straight up bullies receive such an award. Every once in a while I'll see a genuinely nice kid win, but for the most part it is mostly kids who can charm/fool the adults, but are mean to their peers. I'm talking about not just exclusionary snobbery, but downright mean and controlling behavior towards other kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Also, the kid who got the kindness award is well known by the students to be a really mean kid, and that actually made her feel a little better.

That she can win a math competition and see through the hypocrisy of the kindness award speaks well of your kid. Hopefully, she has a kind group of friends, a life in which she enjoys her pursuits, and success in areas of interest. I hear you though , having had another related experience. There are times when the bullshitters get all plums: awards, scholarships, job offers.

[Anonymous]

What grade?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just so I understand this, is your daughter the only one not being recognized while others with similar achievements are?

I don’t know how others are getting recognized. All I know that there are award ceremonies and she never gets anything for her academic achievements.

"Recognition" implies something public, in which case it's knowable. If you don't know how/whether it's happening for other categories of achievement besides athletics and the one teacher-nominated student per grade, then maybe it's not happening at all. In that case, it's not your child being singled out, but it's a school that doesn't value the same things you value.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For example, her bio teacher will not round up 89.9. You have to earn your A-.

?? This is not an example of anything in the original post. This seems to be a separate issue from recognition for achievements.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What achievements are they recognizing at the awards ceremonies? It would be one thing to not have awards ceremonies at all. But, if a school is going to have them, it definitely seems they should be recognizing academic achievements (in addition to other types of achievements).

They have awards where each teacher nominates one student from the entire grade. These are not necessarily the best academically.

They also do ceremonies for sports achievements.

Then you need to say that this is discrimination, if only athletics are rewarded in public, and nothing else in the academic, humanities, art or STEM realm.

It’s only discrimination in the sense that you discriminate against French fries when you order onion rings or a side salad. It’s not unlawful or improper. It’s just a choice (which is what discrimination is).

[Anonymous]

Someone above says their school had 10% National Merit Finalists. That’s well above any school I know of in the DMV. Where/what is the school? Possibly Thomas Jefferson in N. Virginia? Top NYC private? Harvard Westlake? Exeter?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

LOL you are an idiot.

Your kid is in private school "I don't think grades are inflated much" LOL >....

Grow up this whole thread is stupid.

I don’t know what school you are in, but in our school is generally high achieving.

25% have GPA > 4.0, 20% have ACT scores > 34, 10% are National Merit Finalists.

What school is this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD has been going to this private school for five years and has received zero recognition for academic achievements.

They have award ceremonies every year, but DD never gets awarded anything.

When DD gets all As, we only see “Honors Roll” or “Deans List” on the academic report PDF. There is not a ceremony where she is recognized.

When DD won first place in state math competition representing the school, a teacher handed her the certificate in a hallway, passing on the way to a class.

When her programming club placed second in a local competition, she was not acknowledged by the school.

It’s like she’s invisible.

Should I complain about it? What the actual f?

But what are the award ceremonies for? Awards for anything except academics? Athletics, Art, Drama, etc.? Are academic awards given out at the ceremonies?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For example, her bio teacher will not round up 89.9. You have to earn your A-.

?? This is not an example of anything in the original post. This seems to be a separate issue from recognition for achievements.

This is an example regarding grade inflation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
But what are the award ceremonies for? Awards for anything except academics? Athletics, Art, Drama, etc.? Are academic awards given out at the ceremonies?

At the last ceremony they had
- awards for sports

- awards to students nominated by teachers. I don’t know the criteria, but some of nominees were C students so I assume these awards were not academic

- induction of juniors and seniors into Cum Laude Society

[Anonymous]

I think it’s fair to raise to the school. I raised something similar at my dd’s school and they seemed genuinely stunned, like it had never crossed their minds. Said they didn’t want to encourage the kids to be competitive so they didn’t really praise academic achievement. As the parent of an academically strong kid, I have an issue with that, since as you mentioned, they recognize kids for all sorts of other things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter was in this position which was not a huge deal but a bit unpleasant. I think the issue was she’s both an excellent student and very independent-never asked for help, did it seem to need encouragement, etc. I think sometimes teachers use discretionary awards for students they like or have made great strides, which is okay but it doesn’t feel great to feel invisible.

Also, the kid who got the kindness award is well known by the students to be a really mean kid, and that actually made her feel a little better.

We might have DD at the same school…

[Anonymous]

And, likewise, my MS DD was top 5 for a national live “real” music competition in her instrument for HS age. A true money competition, not the online kind. Other schools have put out press releases for this kind of achievement. Our school does not care at all. But if a girl were in the junior olympics, or nationals, for a sport, it would be all over the place. So yes, this is pervasive and nothing new. I honestly don’t know why the focus on athletics is so huge.