Au pair - can they screw up simple tasks

[Anonymous]

OP here - I'm actually a husband and I'm always shocked at all the cattiness on this forum. FWIW, my wife has a doctorate from an Ivy, blue eyes, is a size 0, and has basically the same a*s that she had when we met 20+ years ago. So no one needs to be concerned about some Real Housewives of Fairfax County Lifetime movie; and I've already considered (and rejected) the criticisms in the responses.

I just want to hear some informed opinions about whether I can expect that any ol au pair would be able to handle these requests.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I'm actually a husband and I'm always shocked at all the cattiness on this forum. FWIW, my wife has a doctorate from an Ivy, blue eyes, is a size 0, and has basically the same a*s that she had when we met 20+ years ago. So no one needs to be concerned about some Real Housewives of Fairfax County Lifetime movie; and I've already considered (and rejected) the criticisms in the responses.

I just want to hear some informed opinions about whether I can expect that any ol au pair would be able to handle these requests.

Sure but having an au pair is overkill for your situation and will be way more work for you and your family than what is necessary for what you need.

[Anonymous]

NP. We've hosted for years and with the exception of our first one, all have been great.

Our kids are in school, so we have the split schedule. All ours have driven the kids to activities, including camp and pool in the summer. Ours does the kids' laundry, prepares simple meals for them (feeding the kids can be a full time job, lol), take them to parks and playdates. They work on average no more than 25 hours a week, and we gain a ton of flexibility.

It took some trial and error, but we've found what works for us. The key comes down to screening both for childcare competence and house mate compatibility.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This sounds silly to have an aupair for two hours a day. An 8 and 11 year old can stay home by themselves if they are mature enough for a hour after school. It sounds like you are just looking for transportation. There are services for that.

No they can't. Do you have toddlers to think this? It's not even legal in many places.

What are you talking about? Of course they can. The age in MD to stay home alone is 8 and in Virginia there is not minimum age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I'm actually a husband and I'm always shocked at all the cattiness on this forum. FWIW, my wife has a doctorate from an Ivy, blue eyes, is a size 0, and has basically the same a*s that she had when we met 20+ years ago. So no one needs to be concerned about some Real Housewives of Fairfax County Lifetime movie; and I've already considered (and rejected) the criticisms in the responses.

I just want to hear some informed opinions about whether I can expect that any ol au pair would be able to handle these requests.

The answer is no.

[Anonymous]

We had five au pairs, each of them were fully independently responsible for getting our kids to and from school, driving etc. We never had an issue with any of our au pairs. We started having au pairs when our kids were 3&4 and had au pairs consistently for eight years. Our au pairs helped with homework, taking kids to the pool during the summer, played games with our kids, helped them with laundry, snacks, etc. Our kids loved our au pairs and our au pairs loved our kids.

What you need would have been well within the capabilities of any of our au pairs.

That said, we always practiced driving with our au pairs before we sent them on their own. Only one au pair had an accident in those 8 years (someone else ran a red light and hit our au pair, totaling our car in the process). We did see a few speed camera tickets but usually not more than one per au pair.

We also met a lot of au pairs through our au pairs and my uniform experience was that I liked all of the girls we met. Some had terrible host families, but my other friends who were sane and kind to their au pairs also uniformly had good experiences with au pairs for their families.

I do agree our au pairs from Brazil required more hands on driving guidance than our au pairs from Eastern Europe. I always thought our South African au pair was a bit aggressive on the gas, but not enough to give me anxiety when the kids were riding with her.

[Anonymous]

Why do people send their children to private school if they're not able to transport them? Send your children to a school that has before and after care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do people send their children to private school if they're not able to transport them? Send your children to a school that has before and after care.

Not even all HoCo schools have accessible before/after care for the public schools. the wait lists are full before they open for kindergarten kids without siblings. If I need to find before/after care, I am also going to make sure the elementary school is worth sending my child to as well.

[Anonymous]

We hosted 4 au pairs and the ability to do anything swung vastly. One couldn't get a 8 year old to swim class on time, and one forgot to pick up a 4th grader after band rehearsal at school three times before we rematched.
Just like people, they are snowflakes. I wouldn't expect Nanny level attention to detail.

[Anonymous]

I always think people who hire au pairs are cheap

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I'm actually a husband and I'm always shocked at all the cattiness on this forum. FWIW, my wife has a doctorate from an Ivy, blue eyes, is a size 0, and has basically the same a*s that she had when we met 20+ years ago. So no one needs to be concerned about some Real Housewives of Fairfax County Lifetime movie; and I've already considered (and rejected) the criticisms in the responses.

I just want to hear some informed opinions about whether I can expect that any ol au pair would be able to handle these requests.

Major fail, OP. You took the bait. Never take the bait. You just cheapened your wife.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We need an au pair to drive kids (8 & 11 y.o.) to school, pick them up, and play with them for 1 hour. That's it. No cleaning, no play dates, no reading. Sounds simple, but I've heard enough horror stories to wonder whether we can assume that any au pair can handle this.

AU Pairs don’t clean —they aren’t maids and YES likely they’d make mistakes, they’re only humans right?!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I'm actually a husband and I'm always shocked at all the cattiness on this forum. FWIW, my wife has a doctorate from an Ivy, blue eyes, is a size 0, and has basically the same a*s that she had when we met 20+ years ago. So no one needs to be concerned about some Real Housewives of Fairfax County Lifetime movie; and I've already considered (and rejected) the criticisms in the responses.

I just want to hear some informed opinions about whether I can expect that any ol au pair would be able to handle these requests.

Major fail, OP. You took the bait. Never take the bait. You just cheapened your wife.

Exactly how is an Ivy degree, blue eyes, and a size 0 cheapening someone? (Sounds pretty good to me.)

[Anonymous]

Nope, don’t do it. Our au pair sucked the life out of me. Never again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I'm actually a husband and I'm always shocked at all the cattiness on this forum. FWIW, my wife has a doctorate from an Ivy, blue eyes, is a size 0, and has basically the same a*s that she had when we met 20+ years ago. So no one needs to be concerned about some Real Housewives of Fairfax County Lifetime movie; and I've already considered (and rejected) the criticisms in the responses.

I just want to hear some informed opinions about whether I can expect that any ol au pair would be able to handle these requests.

Major fail, OP. You took the bait. Never take the bait. You just cheapened your wife.

Hey there, an Ivy size 0 is pretty expensive these days!

But, in all seriousness, an au pair is complete overkill for this situation and would be such a pita to deal with. For me, this would be an absolute last resort option.