How many people would get to meet their grandkids?

[Anonymous]

Cancer takes people at any age. DH won’t see his own DCs graduation. Let alone never seeing them marry or have kids.

[Anonymous]

My dad had me at 48 and I had my child at 42. I think I'd be very lucky to live to see a grandchild. I can't imagine living to see a grandchild get married. I wish that could be different but I'm lucky to have had a child at all.

[Anonymous]

Good lord what a self absorbed way to think.

Want to “see your grandkids” as a life goal? Set your kids up so that the well documented barriers to having children young don’t impact them— buy them a house, make sure they don’t have college debt, pay for a nanny. That will maximize (but not guarantee) your chances.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Good lord what a self absorbed way to think.

Want to “see your grandkids” as a life goal? Set your kids up so that the well documented barriers to having children young don’t impact them— buy them a house, make sure they don’t have college debt, pay for a nanny. That will maximize (but not guarantee) your chances.

PP, it's human nature to want to see the next generation born before one dies. It's not self-absorbed, it's a primal instinct.

[Anonymous]

Just realize there are alive and well grandparents out there now who make no effort to see their grandkids now.

[Anonymous]

More people aren't getting married or having kids, so seeing your grandkids is a rapidly disappearing privilege.

[Anonymous]

My parents had 8 children between ages 26-38
after grad school for my mom and dental school for dad in 1940s as first to go to college in both cases. We all went to college and brothers to dental school, with one brother dying of cancer at 23.
They welcomed 20 grandkids from age 53 - 78, and then 13 great grand children as my mom died at age 96 and my dad who was in very good health at 99. He lived to see all grandchildren graduate or enter college except our youngest who has a cognitive disability. They worked hard and had very good support as they aged in their early 90s and lived in CCRC in independent living ear five siblings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With young people postponing marriages and parenting, how many people in their 50's or 60's can now expect to see their grandchildren before cancer or dementia catches up?

I will. We are almost empty nesters and I am 48 (my youngest will be heading to college this year). They all talking about getting married young and to have children while they are still in their 20s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Good lord what a self absorbed way to think.

Want to “see your grandkids” as a life goal? Set your kids up so that the well documented barriers to having children young don’t impact them— buy them a house, make sure they don’t have college debt, pay for a nanny. That will maximize (but not guarantee) your chances.

We don't enable our children. My kid just graduated from college last May, has a six digits salary, on a market to buy her new house. She paid for her college by herself with merit scholarships, we paid only for two years for food and housing, two years she lived rent free working as an RA. If you raised your children right, you don't need to buy them a house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Good lord what a self absorbed way to think.

Want to “see your grandkids” as a life goal? Set your kids up so that the well documented barriers to having children young don’t impact them— buy them a house, make sure they don’t have college debt, pay for a nanny. That will maximize (but not guarantee) your chances.

You are the self absorbed person here.

You are hell bent about not making your point so you disregard others’ concerns.

[Anonymous]

Here my anecdata: my parents married “late in life” for their Silent Generation: my mom was 27 and my dad turned 30 on their honeymoon. They had children right away with the last born when my mom was 36.

I was the first to get married at 27 with my first baby @ 29, last at 36. My siblings followed with marriage and babies and there are 14 grandchildren. My parents enjoyed all of their grandchildren for 17 solid years (dad) and 24 (mom). It can be done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good lord what a self absorbed way to think.

Want to “see your grandkids” as a life goal? Set your kids up so that the well documented barriers to having children young don’t impact them— buy them a house, make sure they don’t have college debt, pay for a nanny. That will maximize (but not guarantee) your chances.

You are the self absorbed person here.

You are hell bent about not making your point so you disregard others’ concerns.

PP isn’t “hell bent,” she calmly stated her pov which makes a lot of sense. It may be human nature to have kids and want to see the next generation, but it’s a very self absorbed and selfish desire. Sometimes you need to put aside your base desires for the good of your kids and your relationship with them, and not pester them to give you grandkids and help them out financially with a house DP, student debt, etc.

And to to the other PP bragging about her kid buying her own house. If you can afford to help out your kid financially why wouldn’t you? I know many wealthy people who are professionally successful and had significant help with down payments, college contributions, etc from their parents. They’re already doing well but the extra help pushed them to a higher level of financial success.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good lord what a self absorbed way to think.

Want to “see your grandkids” as a life goal? Set your kids up so that the well documented barriers to having children young don’t impact them— buy them a house, make sure they don’t have college debt, pay for a nanny. That will maximize (but not guarantee) your chances.

We don't enable our children. My kid just graduated from college last May, has a six digits salary, on a market to buy her new house. She paid for her college by herself with merit scholarships, we paid only for two years for food and housing, two years she lived rent free working as an RA. If you raised your children right, you don't need to buy them a house.

Cool! But since there are endless studies about why people delay/forgo having children, use that data if this something you care about. We know why young people aren’t having children— and that’s what leads to lack of seeing grandchildren— so if this is something which is such a huge priority than posters need act like it and assign resources accordingly.

Zero babies were born because of would-be grandparents complaining on the internet.

[Anonymous]

I think people see hope in babies or a chance to enjoy parenting without any of the responsibilities. Also feel like a milestone is achieved so social status win.

[Anonymous]

You can’t control when or if your kids have kids, so have your own kids when the time is right for you.