DHMS does it get better?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

There is a big movement to self responsibility that’s actually the most important a kid can learn in MS. More important than any of the underlying memorizing topics and the stupid grades. Focus on that transition. Your child absolutely needs to learn to advocate for themselves. Learn this now. Candidly, my reaction to your post was: sounds to me like this is your first or only child and you are too involved.

Sometimes APS can go a bit hardcore on these messages. I have a 5th grader this year and she's been in tears a few times with worry about how hard middle school is going to be based on speeches by her 5th grade teachers. She's a kid who has never needed to be reminded to turn in homework, complete an assignment or even lost a water bottle. She's super organized and consciousness. I keep reminding her that these speeches aren't meant for her, and she understands, but they can be pretty intense. Hopefully middle school won't be 3 years of being beat over the head with the message that high school will be even harder and creating artificial hoops for kids to jump through just to prove they're ready. Life is hard enough.

Ack, *conscientious

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

There is a big movement to self responsibility that’s actually the most important a kid can learn in MS. More important than any of the underlying memorizing topics and the stupid grades. Focus on that transition. Your child absolutely needs to learn to advocate for themselves. Learn this now. Candidly, my reaction to your post was: sounds to me like this is your first or only child and you are too involved.

Sometimes APS can go a bit hardcore on these messages. I have a 5th grader this year and she's been in tears a few times with worry about how hard middle school is going to be based on speeches by her 5th grade teachers. She's a kid who has never needed to be reminded to turn in homework, complete an assignment or even lost a water bottle. She's super organized and consciousness. I keep reminding her that these speeches aren't meant for her, and she understands, but they can be pretty intense. Hopefully middle school won't be 3 years of being beat over the head with the message that high school will be even harder and creating artificial hoops for kids to jump through just to prove they're ready. Life is hard enough.

She sounds very sensitive. If she has her shite together, she'll be so completely fine in middle school. What they ask of kids is not that hard for a motivated and neuro-typical kid. It's just not. A lot of the messaging in middle school is for the parents. Stop doing everything for your kid. Let them fail and make mistakes and sort it out. Some of the parents struggle with this more than anything the kids are asked to do.

Then say it to the Parents and not the kids. the kids who can handle it and will be fine are also the ones most likely hearing the message and worrying that some how or another they are going to be the ones who fall short. The kids who are struggling and identified as having learning issues or ADHD or some other issue that impacts executive functioning are going to worry that things are going to be even more of a struggle.

The kids who need to hear it are not paying attention, if they were paying attention then they wouldn't need to hear it. Those are the NT kids who could be doing better but who are not interested in school or would rather be doing other things. They have the ability to keep up but don't care enough too keep up. They are not listening to any of the warnings.

The parents of the kids who are on top of things are taking the messages that their kids hear and are worrying about what is to come because they know that their kid is on top of things, probably with a certain amount of parental support. The parents of the kids with IEPs and 504s hear the message and groan because things are going to be even harder for their kids and most schools use the change in levels as an additional excuse to not listen to a parent, which makes it harder to help their kids. And the NT kids who could be doing better but don't care will struggle a bit more but figure out how to get their and continue to not care. Until something in them triggers and they decide to care and then they will get their act together and do far better in school. Or they will float on by with their C.

OP and yes. This. Exactly. The year has been very much "float on by with a C."

Also, note, I'm talking about this year's 6th grade class experience, which I understand from other parents (and yes we've all talked) is very different from that of the previous few years that DHMS has been DHMS. I appreciate the poster who mentioned maybe the school is getting to big. I have thought maybe it's that the school is no longer new and shiny and teachers and admin are getting set in ways or frustrated with lack of whatever metric of success they may want to see, feel, experience after a few years of operating. But, in the end, yes, many of us and our children are unhappy and shocked at that fact as we all believed middle school couldn't possibly be as bad as what it's made out to be in pop culture/our own experiences....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

There is a big movement to self responsibility that’s actually the most important a kid can learn in MS. More important than any of the underlying memorizing topics and the stupid grades. Focus on that transition. Your child absolutely needs to learn to advocate for themselves. Learn this now. Candidly, my reaction to your post was: sounds to me like this is your first or only child and you are too involved.

Sometimes APS can go a bit hardcore on these messages. I have a 5th grader this year and she's been in tears a few times with worry about how hard middle school is going to be based on speeches by her 5th grade teachers. She's a kid who has never needed to be reminded to turn in homework, complete an assignment or even lost a water bottle. She's super organized and consciousness. I keep reminding her that these speeches aren't meant for her, and she understands, but they can be pretty intense. Hopefully middle school won't be 3 years of being beat over the head with the message that high school will be even harder and creating artificial hoops for kids to jump through just to prove they're ready. Life is hard enough.

She sounds very sensitive. If she has her shite together, she'll be so completely fine in middle school. What they ask of kids is not that hard for a motivated and neuro-typical kid. It's just not. A lot of the messaging in middle school is for the parents. Stop doing everything for your kid. Let them fail and make mistakes and sort it out. Some of the parents struggle with this more than anything the kids are asked to do.

Then say it to the Parents and not the kids. the kids who can handle it and will be fine are also the ones most likely hearing the message and worrying that some how or another they are going to be the ones who fall short. The kids who are struggling and identified as having learning issues or ADHD or some other issue that impacts executive functioning are going to worry that things are going to be even more of a struggle.

The kids who need to hear it are not paying attention, if they were paying attention then they wouldn't need to hear it. Those are the NT kids who could be doing better but who are not interested in school or would rather be doing other things. They have the ability to keep up but don't care enough too keep up. They are not listening to any of the warnings.

The parents of the kids who are on top of things are taking the messages that their kids hear and are worrying about what is to come because they know that their kid is on top of things, probably with a certain amount of parental support. The parents of the kids with IEPs and 504s hear the message and groan because things are going to be even harder for their kids and most schools use the change in levels as an additional excuse to not listen to a parent, which makes it harder to help their kids. And the NT kids who could be doing better but don't care will struggle a bit more but figure out how to get their and continue to not care. Until something in them triggers and they decide to care and then they will get their act together and do far better in school. Or they will float on by with their C.

OP and yes. This. Exactly. The year has been very much "float on by with a C."

Also, note, I'm talking about this year's 6th grade class experience, which I understand from other parents (and yes we've all talked) is very different from that of the previous few years that DHMS has been DHMS. I appreciate the poster who mentioned maybe the school is getting to big. I have thought maybe it's that the school is no longer new and shiny and teachers and admin are getting set in ways or frustrated with lack of whatever metric of success they may want to see, feel, experience after a few years of operating. But, in the end, yes, many of us and our children are unhappy and shocked at that fact as we all believed middle school couldn't possibly be as bad as what it's made out to be in pop culture/our own experiences....

I'm not at Hamm but also each class can be very different and present different challenges to the administrators. They will tell you there are known "stinker" classes with just a lot of behavior challenges or low performing students and if it's more than average, that of course takes away from the experience as a whole. Just offering that as another thought.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have five years experience at DHMS with two children. The administration (Ms E Smith) is the best in Arlington and on par with what we would expect at any excellent school. As a result of this outlier administration in APS, DHMS tends to get a better pool of teachers. They want to work for her. Period. I know there’s always personality conflicts, and some teachers are going to disagree (of course), but you have to take the overall picture and it’s extremely positive.

We have emailed teachers twice that I can think of and they responded. But, perhaps that is tone/demands/frequency of your emails or the particular teacher happens to be a dud?

Unlike some APS schools, DHMS has a no tech policy, meaning phones away in lockers which I love. However, APS totally undercuts this by handing all the children iPads and then expects teachers to police their use for 25 kids all class. From my perspective, that is an APS problem and not a DHMS problem per se. I know some teachers are better than others, etc., but it’s a real distraction and problem across the board in APS that isn’t properly being dealt with.

My children participated in vastly different kinds of activities at DHMS. One was athletic and did all the sports. Another was primarily interested in clubs. We’ve had teachers go the extra mile, showing up out of school hours, hours away, for unpaid extra activities. We’ve also had a few dud coaches, “coaching” sports they know nothing about (seriously)! But, you know the seasons are short, and my kids were generally very happy. I mean, it’s MS so I don’t exactly expect ES reactions of I love my teacher mommy. Perhaps that’s a transition for you?

There is a big movement to self responsibility that’s actually the most important a kid can learn in MS. More important than any of the underlying memorizing topics and the stupid grades. Focus on that transition. Your child absolutely needs to learn to advocate for themselves. Learn this now. Candidly, my reaction to your post was: sounds to me like this is your first or only child and you are too involved.

So your whole response to this person is you're wrong that's not how it is and what your child is experiencing is not happening. Super helpful.

Also, what basis could you possibly have for saying it's the best administration in APS?

DP. "Best" is of course a matter of opinion, but I agree that Ms. E. Smith is excellent. I have interacted with a number of administrators, and she is among the best I have seen. I also agree that the school has pulled some wonderful staff and teachers away from other schools.

OP's post is interesting to me because it's out of line with my experience and I'm trying to figure out why. I think part of it is that OP is new to middle school. It's odd to complain when the teachers are notifying you about your child's missing assignments. Most parents would complain if they were not being notified. It sounds to me that either OP's expectations are out of line for a public middle school or maybe OP's child has ADHD or a learning disability and needs more support at home or at school.

[Anonymous]

Here’s some advice: you should be emailing the school almost never. Your child, on the other hand, should be learning to communicate directly with the staff/teachers. Sometimes we assist our child with what to say but we never email on the first instance. If you find yourself shooting off emails more than, I dunno, 2-3 times a semester, you aren’t doing this right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At this point in the year, we're considering how to get our 6th grader at DHMS to the finish line. It's as if there's an institutional mentality of hazing the students from the teachers and staff. Passive aggressive emails from the teachers about multiple missing assignments when it turns out there have been a total of 4 assignments over the last month, emails before the end of the term about how parents should know the grade already in a class where nothing is graded online until after the term is over, students receiving wildly bad grades but no outreach to them or the parents unless the student is mature enough to address it in person with their teacher. Reading is a daily class but students are still not able to read at grade level. Emails to the students at 5pm to make sure an assignment given that day is turned in my midnight that same day. Regular errors in grading. Limited outdoor time and weeks at a time with no PE/no exercise all day. iPads on all day. It is rare that a teacher responds to an email from parents. And all the while, the students are being told that this is to prepare them for high school or that they should already be able to do whatever thing the kid is failing at (name the thing: organize a binder, talk to their adult teachers about failing grades, manage their time...). Every kid I have talked to reports being sincerely and fundamentally unhappy. Although I value preparing my child for high school, it feels like the entire school is staffed by that one jerk teacher you had who got off on weeding out students, hazing, and bullying.

Is this just how school is now? For all the talk of school being easier now or more permissive now than when adults were kids, this just all seems like a lot and not anything in line with our family's values. Note, we have tried talking to our student's TA and counselor but we were given verbatim the same response from both, that there are no problems and that they are teaching the students to "advocate." When asked how students were being taught to advocate and how to support our student, the conversation was over on their end.

Is this the new Arlington way?

I am reading this carefully and trying to parse out what you are saying.

Who is getting wildly bad grades in 6th grade in APS? I can tell you it's no kid who is even half way paying attention or trying at all.

PE is paired with health. So yes, there are blocks when they're not doing PE. This is not Hamm specific.

These kids are all showing up from some of the most cushy elementary schools in Arlington and they can't read at grade level?

I am sincerely confused by some of this. 6th grade shouldn't be this hard.

And finally...I agree they should be able to do those things. Organize the binder. Talk to a teacher. Manage their time. If they can't do these things, you as their parent should help them. APS isn't going to provide one-on-one support to help a kid this age develop executive functioning skills if they can't do the basics or develop skills to speak up to an adult. That's your job as their parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have five years experience at DHMS with two children. The administration (Ms E Smith) is the best in Arlington and on par with what we would expect at any excellent school. As a result of this outlier administration in APS, DHMS tends to get a better pool of teachers. They want to work for her. Period. I know there’s always personality conflicts, and some teachers are going to disagree (of course), but you have to take the overall picture and it’s extremely positive.

We have emailed teachers twice that I can think of and they responded. But, perhaps that is tone/demands/frequency of your emails or the particular teacher happens to be a dud?

Unlike some APS schools, DHMS has a no tech policy, meaning phones away in lockers which I love. However, APS totally undercuts this by handing all the children iPads and then expects teachers to police their use for 25 kids all class. From my perspective, that is an APS problem and not a DHMS problem per se. I know some teachers are better than others, etc., but it’s a real distraction and problem across the board in APS that isn’t properly being dealt with.

My children participated in vastly different kinds of activities at DHMS. One was athletic and did all the sports. Another was primarily interested in clubs. We’ve had teachers go the extra mile, showing up out of school hours, hours away, for unpaid extra activities. We’ve also had a few dud coaches, “coaching” sports they know nothing about (seriously)! But, you know the seasons are short, and my kids were generally very happy. I mean, it’s MS so I don’t exactly expect ES reactions of I love my teacher mommy. Perhaps that’s a transition for you?

There is a big movement to self responsibility that’s actually the most important a kid can learn in MS. More important than any of the underlying memorizing topics and the stupid grades. Focus on that transition. Your child absolutely needs to learn to advocate for themselves. Learn this now. Candidly, my reaction to your post was: sounds to me like this is your first or only child and you are too involved.

So your whole response to this person is you're wrong that's not how it is and what your child is experiencing is not happening. Super helpful.

Also, what basis could you possibly have for saying it's the best administration in APS?

DP. "Best" is of course a matter of opinion, but I agree that Ms. E. Smith is excellent. I have interacted with a number of administrators, and she is among the best I have seen. I also agree that the school has pulled some wonderful staff and teachers away from other schools.

OP's post is interesting to me because it's out of line with my experience and I'm trying to figure out why. I think part of it is that OP is new to middle school. It's odd to complain when the teachers are notifying you about your child's missing assignments. Most parents would complain if they were not being notified. It sounds to me that either OP's expectations are out of line for a public middle school or maybe OP's child has ADHD or a learning disability and needs more support at home or at school.

I am not at Hamm but I think APS transitioning to middle school in 6th grade could be what's going on Developmentally, some kids are really ready and some kids really aren't. Maybe this particular 6th grade class at Hamm just has a lot more not ready kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have five years experience at DHMS with two children. The administration (Ms E Smith) is the best in Arlington and on par with what we would expect at any excellent school. As a result of this outlier administration in APS, DHMS tends to get a better pool of teachers. They want to work for her. Period. I know there’s always personality conflicts, and some teachers are going to disagree (of course), but you have to take the overall picture and it’s extremely positive.

We have emailed teachers twice that I can think of and they responded. But, perhaps that is tone/demands/frequency of your emails or the particular teacher happens to be a dud?

Unlike some APS schools, DHMS has a no tech policy, meaning phones away in lockers which I love. However, APS totally undercuts this by handing all the children iPads and then expects teachers to police their use for 25 kids all class. From my perspective, that is an APS problem and not a DHMS problem per se. I know some teachers are better than others, etc., but it’s a real distraction and problem across the board in APS that isn’t properly being dealt with.

My children participated in vastly different kinds of activities at DHMS. One was athletic and did all the sports. Another was primarily interested in clubs. We’ve had teachers go the extra mile, showing up out of school hours, hours away, for unpaid extra activities. We’ve also had a few dud coaches, “coaching” sports they know nothing about (seriously)! But, you know the seasons are short, and my kids were generally very happy. I mean, it’s MS so I don’t exactly expect ES reactions of I love my teacher mommy. Perhaps that’s a transition for you?

There is a big movement to self responsibility that’s actually the most important a kid can learn in MS. More important than any of the underlying memorizing topics and the stupid grades. Focus on that transition. Your child absolutely needs to learn to advocate for themselves. Learn this now. Candidly, my reaction to your post was: sounds to me like this is your first or only child and you are too involved.

So your whole response to this person is you're wrong that's not how it is and what your child is experiencing is not happening. Super helpful.

Also, what basis could you possibly have for saying it's the best administration in APS?

DP. "Best" is of course a matter of opinion, but I agree that Ms. E. Smith is excellent. I have interacted with a number of administrators, and she is among the best I have seen. I also agree that the school has pulled some wonderful staff and teachers away from other schools.

OP's post is interesting to me because it's out of line with my experience and I'm trying to figure out why. I think part of it is that OP is new to middle school. It's odd to complain when the teachers are notifying you about your child's missing assignments. Most parents would complain if they were not being notified. It sounds to me that either OP's expectations are out of line for a public middle school or maybe OP's child has ADHD or a learning disability and needs more support at home or at school.

I am not at Hamm but I think APS transitioning to middle school in 6th grade could be what's going on Developmentally, some kids are really ready and some kids really aren't. Maybe this particular 6th grade class at Hamm just has a lot more not ready kids.

It’s 300 kids mostly from Glebe and Taylor. I mean, it’s possible that sixth grade has a bunch of extremist duds but I highly doubt that knowing the average home price.

I suspect this poster just happens to be wrong. I mean, maybe not wrong for their child and their experience and their needs but generally speaking wrong. When you repeat things like: everyone says this is some sort of horrible experience and yet you read the thousands of posts for years about people generally liking Hamm I think this person is just really needy and their child is struggling to transition to MS and they are blaming the school.

There’s no PE half the time. That’s APS.

Your child needs significant executive function support at home. Perhaps consider a tutor for this?

You need to help your child email and communicate with teachers. You should not be doing it for them.

Perhaps you misunderstood how Parentvue and Canvas work? I will get notified that my child has a “D” in an automatically generated email from parentvue. My child does not have a D. They have three assignments in Canvas and the teacher hasn’t graded one, meaning they are missing a third of their current grade (which is a very small portion of their whole grade). When this happens, do not email the teacher and demand an explanation. Figure it out yourself. I suspect this is what you are referring to in your post. If your child is routinely — and I mean routinely — getting Cs or lower in APS middle school as a final grade in their report card your child probably has some learning differences that need to be addressed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have five years experience at DHMS with two children. The administration (Ms E Smith) is the best in Arlington and on par with what we would expect at any excellent school. As a result of this outlier administration in APS, DHMS tends to get a better pool of teachers. They want to work for her. Period. I know there’s always personality conflicts, and some teachers are going to disagree (of course), but you have to take the overall picture and it’s extremely positive.

We have emailed teachers twice that I can think of and they responded. But, perhaps that is tone/demands/frequency of your emails or the particular teacher happens to be a dud?

Unlike some APS schools, DHMS has a no tech policy, meaning phones away in lockers which I love. However, APS totally undercuts this by handing all the children iPads and then expects teachers to police their use for 25 kids all class. From my perspective, that is an APS problem and not a DHMS problem per se. I know some teachers are better than others, etc., but it’s a real distraction and problem across the board in APS that isn’t properly being dealt with.

My children participated in vastly different kinds of activities at DHMS. One was athletic and did all the sports. Another was primarily interested in clubs. We’ve had teachers go the extra mile, showing up out of school hours, hours away, for unpaid extra activities. We’ve also had a few dud coaches, “coaching” sports they know nothing about (seriously)! But, you know the seasons are short, and my kids were generally very happy. I mean, it’s MS so I don’t exactly expect ES reactions of I love my teacher mommy. Perhaps that’s a transition for you?

There is a big movement to self responsibility that’s actually the most important a kid can learn in MS. More important than any of the underlying memorizing topics and the stupid grades. Focus on that transition. Your child absolutely needs to learn to advocate for themselves. Learn this now. Candidly, my reaction to your post was: sounds to me like this is your first or only child and you are too involved.

So your whole response to this person is you're wrong that's not how it is and what your child is experiencing is not happening. Super helpful.

Also, what basis could you possibly have for saying it's the best administration in APS?

DP. "Best" is of course a matter of opinion, but I agree that Ms. E. Smith is excellent. I have interacted with a number of administrators, and she is among the best I have seen. I also agree that the school has pulled some wonderful staff and teachers away from other schools.

OP's post is interesting to me because it's out of line with my experience and I'm trying to figure out why. I think part of it is that OP is new to middle school. It's odd to complain when the teachers are notifying you about your child's missing assignments. Most parents would complain if they were not being notified. It sounds to me that either OP's expectations are out of line for a public middle school or maybe OP's child has ADHD or a learning disability and needs more support at home or at school.

I am not at Hamm but I think APS transitioning to middle school in 6th grade could be what's going on Developmentally, some kids are really ready and some kids really aren't. Maybe this particular 6th grade class at Hamm just has a lot more not ready kids.

When did it transition?

6-8 is pretty standard across the country for MS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have five years experience at DHMS with two children. The administration (Ms E Smith) is the best in Arlington and on par with what we would expect at any excellent school. As a result of this outlier administration in APS, DHMS tends to get a better pool of teachers. They want to work for her. Period. I know there’s always personality conflicts, and some teachers are going to disagree (of course), but you have to take the overall picture and it’s extremely positive.

We have emailed teachers twice that I can think of and they responded. But, perhaps that is tone/demands/frequency of your emails or the particular teacher happens to be a dud?

Unlike some APS schools, DHMS has a no tech policy, meaning phones away in lockers which I love. However, APS totally undercuts this by handing all the children iPads and then expects teachers to police their use for 25 kids all class. From my perspective, that is an APS problem and not a DHMS problem per se. I know some teachers are better than others, etc., but it’s a real distraction and problem across the board in APS that isn’t properly being dealt with.

My children participated in vastly different kinds of activities at DHMS. One was athletic and did all the sports. Another was primarily interested in clubs. We’ve had teachers go the extra mile, showing up out of school hours, hours away, for unpaid extra activities. We’ve also had a few dud coaches, “coaching” sports they know nothing about (seriously)! But, you know the seasons are short, and my kids were generally very happy. I mean, it’s MS so I don’t exactly expect ES reactions of I love my teacher mommy. Perhaps that’s a transition for you?

There is a big movement to self responsibility that’s actually the most important a kid can learn in MS. More important than any of the underlying memorizing topics and the stupid grades. Focus on that transition. Your child absolutely needs to learn to advocate for themselves. Learn this now. Candidly, my reaction to your post was: sounds to me like this is your first or only child and you are too involved.

So your whole response to this person is you're wrong that's not how it is and what your child is experiencing is not happening. Super helpful.

Also, what basis could you possibly have for saying it's the best administration in APS?

DP. "Best" is of course a matter of opinion, but I agree that Ms. E. Smith is excellent. I have interacted with a number of administrators, and she is among the best I have seen. I also agree that the school has pulled some wonderful staff and teachers away from other schools.

OP's post is interesting to me because it's out of line with my experience and I'm trying to figure out why. I think part of it is that OP is new to middle school. It's odd to complain when the teachers are notifying you about your child's missing assignments. Most parents would complain if they were not being notified. It sounds to me that either OP's expectations are out of line for a public middle school or maybe OP's child has ADHD or a learning disability and needs more support at home or at school.

I am not at Hamm but I think APS transitioning to middle school in 6th grade could be what's going on Developmentally, some kids are really ready and some kids really aren't. Maybe this particular 6th grade class at Hamm just has a lot more not ready kids.

When did it transition?

6-8 is pretty standard across the country for MS.

Hahha. They made this change in …. 1990.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have five years experience at DHMS with two children. The administration (Ms E Smith) is the best in Arlington and on par with what we would expect at any excellent school. As a result of this outlier administration in APS, DHMS tends to get a better pool of teachers. They want to work for her. Period. I know there’s always personality conflicts, and some teachers are going to disagree (of course), but you have to take the overall picture and it’s extremely positive.

We have emailed teachers twice that I can think of and they responded. But, perhaps that is tone/demands/frequency of your emails or the particular teacher happens to be a dud?

Unlike some APS schools, DHMS has a no tech policy, meaning phones away in lockers which I love. However, APS totally undercuts this by handing all the children iPads and then expects teachers to police their use for 25 kids all class. From my perspective, that is an APS problem and not a DHMS problem per se. I know some teachers are better than others, etc., but it’s a real distraction and problem across the board in APS that isn’t properly being dealt with.

My children participated in vastly different kinds of activities at DHMS. One was athletic and did all the sports. Another was primarily interested in clubs. We’ve had teachers go the extra mile, showing up out of school hours, hours away, for unpaid extra activities. We’ve also had a few dud coaches, “coaching” sports they know nothing about (seriously)! But, you know the seasons are short, and my kids were generally very happy. I mean, it’s MS so I don’t exactly expect ES reactions of I love my teacher mommy. Perhaps that’s a transition for you?

There is a big movement to self responsibility that’s actually the most important a kid can learn in MS. More important than any of the underlying memorizing topics and the stupid grades. Focus on that transition. Your child absolutely needs to learn to advocate for themselves. Learn this now. Candidly, my reaction to your post was: sounds to me like this is your first or only child and you are too involved.

So your whole response to this person is you're wrong that's not how it is and what your child is experiencing is not happening. Super helpful.

Also, what basis could you possibly have for saying it's the best administration in APS?

DP. "Best" is of course a matter of opinion, but I agree that Ms. E. Smith is excellent. I have interacted with a number of administrators, and she is among the best I have seen. I also agree that the school has pulled some wonderful staff and teachers away from other schools.

OP's post is interesting to me because it's out of line with my experience and I'm trying to figure out why. I think part of it is that OP is new to middle school. It's odd to complain when the teachers are notifying you about your child's missing assignments. Most parents would complain if they were not being notified. It sounds to me that either OP's expectations are out of line for a public middle school or maybe OP's child has ADHD or a learning disability and needs more support at home or at school.

I am not at Hamm but I think APS transitioning to middle school in 6th grade could be what's going on Developmentally, some kids are really ready and some kids really aren't. Maybe this particular 6th grade class at Hamm just has a lot more not ready kids.

When did it transition?

6-8 is pretty standard across the country for MS.

I think the comparison is that Fairfax goes to middle school in 7th. All APS kids go to middle school in 6th.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

There is a big movement to self responsibility that’s actually the most important a kid can learn in MS. More important than any of the underlying memorizing topics and the stupid grades. Focus on that transition. Your child absolutely needs to learn to advocate for themselves. Learn this now. Candidly, my reaction to your post was: sounds to me like this is your first or only child and you are too involved.

Sometimes APS can go a bit hardcore on these messages. I have a 5th grader this year and she's been in tears a few times with worry about how hard middle school is going to be based on speeches by her 5th grade teachers. She's a kid who has never needed to be reminded to turn in homework, complete an assignment or even lost a water bottle. She's super organized and consciousness. I keep reminding her that these speeches aren't meant for her, and she understands, but they can be pretty intense. Hopefully middle school won't be 3 years of being beat over the head with the message that high school will be even harder and creating artificial hoops for kids to jump through just to prove they're ready. Life is hard enough.

She sounds very sensitive. If she has her shite together, she'll be so completely fine in middle school. What they ask of kids is not that hard for a motivated and neuro-typical kid. It's just not. A lot of the messaging in middle school is for the parents. Stop doing everything for your kid. Let them fail and make mistakes and sort it out. Some of the parents struggle with this more than anything the kids are asked to do.

Then say it to the Parents and not the kids. the kids who can handle it and will be fine are also the ones most likely hearing the message and worrying that some how or another they are going to be the ones who fall short. The kids who are struggling and identified as having learning issues or ADHD or some other issue that impacts executive functioning are going to worry that things are going to be even more of a struggle.

The kids who need to hear it are not paying attention, if they were paying attention then they wouldn't need to hear it. Those are the NT kids who could be doing better but who are not interested in school or would rather be doing other things. They have the ability to keep up but don't care enough too keep up. They are not listening to any of the warnings.

The parents of the kids who are on top of things are taking the messages that their kids hear and are worrying about what is to come because they know that their kid is on top of things, probably with a certain amount of parental support. The parents of the kids with IEPs and 504s hear the message and groan because things are going to be even harder for their kids and most schools use the change in levels as an additional excuse to not listen to a parent, which makes it harder to help their kids. And the NT kids who could be doing better but don't care will struggle a bit more but figure out how to get their and continue to not care. Until something in them triggers and they decide to care and then they will get their act together and do far better in school. Or they will float on by with their C.

OP and yes. This. Exactly. The year has been very much "float on by with a C."

Also, note, I'm talking about this year's 6th grade class experience, which I understand from other parents (and yes we've all talked) is very different from that of the previous few years that DHMS has been DHMS. I appreciate the poster who mentioned maybe the school is getting to big. I have thought maybe it's that the school is no longer new and shiny and teachers and admin are getting set in ways or frustrated with lack of whatever metric of success they may want to see, feel, experience after a few years of operating. But, in the end, yes, many of us and our children are unhappy and shocked at that fact as we all believed middle school couldn't possibly be as bad as what it's made out to be in pop culture/our own experiences....

The biggest change between last year’s 6th grade and this year’s 6th grade is the students.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have five years experience at DHMS with two children. The administration (Ms E Smith) is the best in Arlington and on par with what we would expect at any excellent school. As a result of this outlier administration in APS, DHMS tends to get a better pool of teachers. They want to work for her. Period. I know there’s always personality conflicts, and some teachers are going to disagree (of course), but you have to take the overall picture and it’s extremely positive.

We have emailed teachers twice that I can think of and they responded. But, perhaps that is tone/demands/frequency of your emails or the particular teacher happens to be a dud?

Unlike some APS schools, DHMS has a no tech policy, meaning phones away in lockers which I love. However, APS totally undercuts this by handing all the children iPads and then expects teachers to police their use for 25 kids all class. From my perspective, that is an APS problem and not a DHMS problem per se. I know some teachers are better than others, etc., but it’s a real distraction and problem across the board in APS that isn’t properly being dealt with.

My children participated in vastly different kinds of activities at DHMS. One was athletic and did all the sports. Another was primarily interested in clubs. We’ve had teachers go the extra mile, showing up out of school hours, hours away, for unpaid extra activities. We’ve also had a few dud coaches, “coaching” sports they know nothing about (seriously)! But, you know the seasons are short, and my kids were generally very happy. I mean, it’s MS so I don’t exactly expect ES reactions of I love my teacher mommy. Perhaps that’s a transition for you?

There is a big movement to self responsibility that’s actually the most important a kid can learn in MS. More important than any of the underlying memorizing topics and the stupid grades. Focus on that transition. Your child absolutely needs to learn to advocate for themselves. Learn this now. Candidly, my reaction to your post was: sounds to me like this is your first or only child and you are too involved.

So your whole response to this person is you're wrong that's not how it is and what your child is experiencing is not happening. Super helpful.

Also, what basis could you possibly have for saying it's the best administration in APS?

DP. "Best" is of course a matter of opinion, but I agree that Ms. E. Smith is excellent. I have interacted with a number of administrators, and she is among the best I have seen. I also agree that the school has pulled some wonderful staff and teachers away from other schools.

OP's post is interesting to me because it's out of line with my experience and I'm trying to figure out why. I think part of it is that OP is new to middle school. It's odd to complain when the teachers are notifying you about your child's missing assignments. Most parents would complain if they were not being notified. It sounds to me that either OP's expectations are out of line for a public middle school or maybe OP's child has ADHD or a learning disability and needs more support at home or at school.

I am not at Hamm but I think APS transitioning to middle school in 6th grade could be what's going on Developmentally, some kids are really ready and some kids really aren't. Maybe this particular 6th grade class at Hamm just has a lot more not ready kids.

When did it transition?

6-8 is pretty standard across the country for MS.

I think the comparison is that Fairfax goes to middle school in 7th. All APS kids go to middle school in 6th.

As do most kids across the country…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have five years experience at DHMS with two children. The administration (Ms E Smith) is the best in Arlington and on par with what we would expect at any excellent school. As a result of this outlier administration in APS, DHMS tends to get a better pool of teachers. They want to work for her. Period. I know there’s always personality conflicts, and some teachers are going to disagree (of course), but you have to take the overall picture and it’s extremely positive.

We have emailed teachers twice that I can think of and they responded. But, perhaps that is tone/demands/frequency of your emails or the particular teacher happens to be a dud?

Unlike some APS schools, DHMS has a no tech policy, meaning phones away in lockers which I love. However, APS totally undercuts this by handing all the children iPads and then expects teachers to police their use for 25 kids all class. From my perspective, that is an APS problem and not a DHMS problem per se. I know some teachers are better than others, etc., but it’s a real distraction and problem across the board in APS that isn’t properly being dealt with.

My children participated in vastly different kinds of activities at DHMS. One was athletic and did all the sports. Another was primarily interested in clubs. We’ve had teachers go the extra mile, showing up out of school hours, hours away, for unpaid extra activities. We’ve also had a few dud coaches, “coaching” sports they know nothing about (seriously)! But, you know the seasons are short, and my kids were generally very happy. I mean, it’s MS so I don’t exactly expect ES reactions of I love my teacher mommy. Perhaps that’s a transition for you?

There is a big movement to self responsibility that’s actually the most important a kid can learn in MS. More important than any of the underlying memorizing topics and the stupid grades. Focus on that transition. Your child absolutely needs to learn to advocate for themselves. Learn this now. Candidly, my reaction to your post was: sounds to me like this is your first or only child and you are too involved.

So your whole response to this person is you're wrong that's not how it is and what your child is experiencing is not happening. Super helpful.

Also, what basis could you possibly have for saying it's the best administration in APS?

DP. "Best" is of course a matter of opinion, but I agree that Ms. E. Smith is excellent. I have interacted with a number of administrators, and she is among the best I have seen. I also agree that the school has pulled some wonderful staff and teachers away from other schools.

OP's post is interesting to me because it's out of line with my experience and I'm trying to figure out why. I think part of it is that OP is new to middle school. It's odd to complain when the teachers are notifying you about your child's missing assignments. Most parents would complain if they were not being notified. It sounds to me that either OP's expectations are out of line for a public middle school or maybe OP's child has ADHD or a learning disability and needs more support at home or at school.

I am not at Hamm but I think APS transitioning to middle school in 6th grade could be what's going on Developmentally, some kids are really ready and some kids really aren't. Maybe this particular 6th grade class at Hamm just has a lot more not ready kids.

It’s 300 kids mostly from Glebe and Taylor. I mean, it’s possible that sixth grade has a bunch of extremist duds but I highly doubt that knowing the average home price.

I suspect this poster just happens to be wrong. I mean, maybe not wrong for their child and their experience and their needs but generally speaking wrong. When you repeat things like: everyone says this is some sort of horrible experience and yet you read the thousands of posts for years about people generally liking Hamm I think this person is just really needy and their child is struggling to transition to MS and they are blaming the school.

There’s no PE half the time. That’s APS.

Your child needs significant executive function support at home. Perhaps consider a tutor for this?

You need to help your child email and communicate with teachers. You should not be doing it for them.

Perhaps you misunderstood how Parentvue and Canvas work? I will get notified that my child has a “D” in an automatically generated email from parentvue. My child does not have a D. They have three assignments in Canvas and the teacher hasn’t graded one, meaning they are missing a third of their current grade (which is a very small portion of their whole grade). When this happens, do not email the teacher and demand an explanation. Figure it out yourself. I suspect this is what you are referring to in your post. If your child is routinely — and I mean routinely — getting Cs or lower in APS middle school as a final grade in their report card your child probably has some learning differences that need to be addressed.

Multiple people chimed in agreeing with the OP. I dunno. Doesn't seem like it's just some clueless OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have five years experience at DHMS with two children. The administration (Ms E Smith) is the best in Arlington and on par with what we would expect at any excellent school. As a result of this outlier administration in APS, DHMS tends to get a better pool of teachers. They want to work for her. Period. I know there’s always personality conflicts, and some teachers are going to disagree (of course), but you have to take the overall picture and it’s extremely positive.

We have emailed teachers twice that I can think of and they responded. But, perhaps that is tone/demands/frequency of your emails or the particular teacher happens to be a dud?

Unlike some APS schools, DHMS has a no tech policy, meaning phones away in lockers which I love. However, APS totally undercuts this by handing all the children iPads and then expects teachers to police their use for 25 kids all class. From my perspective, that is an APS problem and not a DHMS problem per se. I know some teachers are better than others, etc., but it’s a real distraction and problem across the board in APS that isn’t properly being dealt with.

My children participated in vastly different kinds of activities at DHMS. One was athletic and did all the sports. Another was primarily interested in clubs. We’ve had teachers go the extra mile, showing up out of school hours, hours away, for unpaid extra activities. We’ve also had a few dud coaches, “coaching” sports they know nothing about (seriously)! But, you know the seasons are short, and my kids were generally very happy. I mean, it’s MS so I don’t exactly expect ES reactions of I love my teacher mommy. Perhaps that’s a transition for you?

There is a big movement to self responsibility that’s actually the most important a kid can learn in MS. More important than any of the underlying memorizing topics and the stupid grades. Focus on that transition. Your child absolutely needs to learn to advocate for themselves. Learn this now. Candidly, my reaction to your post was: sounds to me like this is your first or only child and you are too involved.

So your whole response to this person is you're wrong that's not how it is and what your child is experiencing is not happening. Super helpful.

Also, what basis could you possibly have for saying it's the best administration in APS?

DP. "Best" is of course a matter of opinion, but I agree that Ms. E. Smith is excellent. I have interacted with a number of administrators, and she is among the best I have seen. I also agree that the school has pulled some wonderful staff and teachers away from other schools.

OP's post is interesting to me because it's out of line with my experience and I'm trying to figure out why. I think part of it is that OP is new to middle school. It's odd to complain when the teachers are notifying you about your child's missing assignments. Most parents would complain if they were not being notified. It sounds to me that either OP's expectations are out of line for a public middle school or maybe OP's child has ADHD or a learning disability and needs more support at home or at school.

I am not at Hamm but I think APS transitioning to middle school in 6th grade could be what's going on Developmentally, some kids are really ready and some kids really aren't. Maybe this particular 6th grade class at Hamm just has a lot more not ready kids.

It’s 300 kids mostly from Glebe and Taylor. I mean, it’s possible that sixth grade has a bunch of extremist duds but I highly doubt that knowing the average home price.

I suspect this poster just happens to be wrong. I mean, maybe not wrong for their child and their experience and their needs but generally speaking wrong. When you repeat things like: everyone says this is some sort of horrible experience and yet you read the thousands of posts for years about people generally liking Hamm I think this person is just really needy and their child is struggling to transition to MS and they are blaming the school.

There’s no PE half the time. That’s APS.

Your child needs significant executive function support at home. Perhaps consider a tutor for this?

You need to help your child email and communicate with teachers. You should not be doing it for them.

Perhaps you misunderstood how Parentvue and Canvas work? I will get notified that my child has a “D” in an automatically generated email from parentvue. My child does not have a D. They have three assignments in Canvas and the teacher hasn’t graded one, meaning they are missing a third of their current grade (which is a very small portion of their whole grade). When this happens, do not email the teacher and demand an explanation. Figure it out yourself. I suspect this is what you are referring to in your post. If your child is routinely — and I mean routinely — getting Cs or lower in APS middle school as a final grade in their report card your child probably has some learning differences that need to be addressed.

Agree.