6 week old baby, when does it get easier?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know I will get flamed for this...but have you considered putting your child to sleep on their tummy? My son turned into a tummy sleeper as soon as he could roll over. My daughter became a tummy sleeper at 1 week. Basically anytime I put her to sleep on her back she woke up immediately. I know there are risks of SIDS, but it was a risk I was willing to take. Her sleep improved immensely.

I started out just doing it at naps, then when I was comfortable with that, did it for nighttime as well.

FWIW, my 2 boys (now 4.5 yo and 2.5 yo) were the same way. For me, it was either have them sleep on their tummies (bad) or sleep with mom / dad (also bad from a SIDS perspective).

[Anonymous]

No colic or reflux here, and my DD ended up being mostly FF, but 6-14 weeks proved to be the most difficult time, so far. For the first seven weeks, she refused to sleep--day or night--in her crib or bassinet. She would only sleep while we held her. My husband and I took shifts throughout the night. Looking back, it was lovely being able to hold her while she slept, but during the thick of it all, it seemed utterly exhausting! This is why NO ONE warns you about these things--mommy and daddy amnesia. Around seven weeks, she was able to hold up her head and shoulders and move her head from side to side when she was on her tummy, so we started letting her sleep that way with the pediatrician's blessing. Low and behold, she started sleeping in her crib.

She quickly became a good night time sleeper, but napping was another issue, beginning around eight weeks. At first, the naps were short, and she didn't fall asleep every 1-1/2 to 2 hours like the books said. Eventually, we realized she had a different pattern. And when she was ready to sleep, we just did whatever was necessary--holding, swaying, feeding, pacifier--until she fell asleep. "Drowsy but awake" is totally bunk in my opinion, and the so-called sleep experts just make parents feel guilty, like they're causing harm, if they have the nerve to rock their child to sleep. Babies want and need to be held by their parents or caregivers. Sure, "drowsy but awake" works for some at such a young age, but most parents I know personally, have not had success with this until later. Around four or five months (again, mommy amnesia), she started wanting to be put down before she was totally asleep. She decided she didn't need
as much help from us, so we followed her cue. From my experience, I think it's so much easier to just ride-out some of these stages than to fight against them. I'm not endorsing anything for you, personally, just sharing my story.

You and your baby will find your way. This stage will pass soon, and you'll be all the more equipped to deal with the next set of challenges. Best of luck to you and yours!

[Anonymous]

At three months. With both DS, that was when they started sleeping longer through the night.

[Anonymous]

Give it another 3 years and it will improve dramatically. Just in time to get preggo with number 2 and go through it all again. Groan.

[Anonymous]

ITA with PP who mentioned the first social smile as the corner-turning moment, which for us came at 6 weeks. It made me feel like DD was a human being and we had some kind of relationship. (Thanks so much for being so honest!) I too truly worried that she didn't actually like me for the first 6 weeks, which was just depressing. I know it feels selfish to acknowledge that it's exhausting to always be "giving," but we're still people too, moms!

DD also needed to sleep on me or DH for at least 8 weeks, I think, so we'd take shifts overnight, with him taking her from 10-3 and me from 3 onward. (She's only 10 mos now, but the memory of those days has receded, as others noted.) We then let her sleep in the car seat in her room. What finally got her into the crib, with us sleeping in a bed in her room for a while, was actually some tough love from my mom, who just stuck her in there and let her CIO while visiting one weekend. Normally, I'm opposed on principle to mom's unsolicited 70's parenting advice (put cereal in the bottle at 4 wks??), but she happened to be right this time. DD also started daycare at 10 weeks when I went back to work, which was great for her in that it forced her to learn how to nap in a crib and be held a little less. On the other hand, it was devastating to me because she had just started to interact and be fun.

I also thought sitting up, which she did just short of 6 mos, was a total game-changer in that it allowed her to play in many different ways. Same for crawling, around 8 mos, and now walking. Still, for me, her smiling was the first time I felt like I could exhale and imagine things getting easier.

[Anonymous]

Four months was a real turning point for me because he started taking regular, predictable naps. It was HEAVEN. I told a friend who, at 8 weeks, was going stir-crazy. Sure enough, life turned around for her at 4 months too. I think it's neurological. The baby has finally come to terms with being out of the womb by that point.

HANG IN THERE! It gets so, so, so, so, so much easier and more predictable.

[Anonymous]

Yep, WORST part is the 6 week growth spurt, and by 2, 3 months things even out a lot. I would also check to make sure he's getting enough to eat, but otherwise, if he's that much of a crier, maybe a Moby Wrap is in your future. You can pretty do much everything while wearing him if need be. Otherwise, invest in a bouncy chair with vibration and white noise for sleeping. Until 3-4 months, the crib was not a preferred daytime sleep location.

[Anonymous]

When was the last time YOU got a good night's sleep? DS's godmother took him overnight once a month from pretty early on---three months or something? I got just enough sleep to keep me going the rest of the time.

Pace yourself. It's a very long haul.

[Happiest Baby on the Block, go get it right now. It's the gospel. Swaddle cloth, swing, shushing sounds. Now.]

[Anonymous]

I can't agree with the PP's advice more on Happiest Baby on the Block-- and I know it works because I can pick up a friend's crying baby and get him or her to stop crying instantly with the 5 S's. It's a parent's miracle-cure.

[Anonymous]

Haven't read all the posts so don't know what others have said, but I had an extremely difficult time with my baby at around 6 weeks as well. He would only sleep if put in the swing swaddled (of course strapped in as well). I highly recommend you invest in a swing. We had the Fisher Price cradle swing and we would not have survived without it. Also, we followed all the recommendations of Dr. Karp in his book "the happiest baby on the block" (the swing is actually one of the recommendations of his). As far as the baby sleeping in a crib on his own for naps, I am still waiting for this to happen and my baby is 10 months old !!! But I want to reassure you, it does get a lot better at around 3-4 months once they start sleeping long stretches at night.

[Anonymous]

10:49 here. My baby didn't like to be swaddled and hated the swing! My best friend was a Happiest Baby on the Block advocate, and she tried the techniques on my daughter who just looked at her like she was crazy. Babies are crafty, complicated little creatures, aren't they?!

OP, you have a lot of great advice here. I hope you find some solutions that work for your family.

[Anonymous]

for me, things got much easier in my 7th-8th week. I started to feel more like myself. I remember those weeks being excruciating but it will get easier and easier. My little one was a good napper and eater. I was pretty disciplined. I made sure he had a full feed every time by keeping him awake and by 6-7 weeks, he was eating every two - three hours. I'd put him to sleep about an hour after he ate. I loved the Baby Whisperer's Eat-Activity-Sleep cycle. It worked for him. Good luck and you'll get through this. I also joined PACE (which you can find on-line), which was a mother/baby discussion group that provided an amazing outlet for all of the emotions, questions, etc. Highly encourage you to join!