Youth Soccer and Playing Time

[Anonymous]

Your coach is a jerk. He's playing kids up so 7-8 year olds on your U10? He should be playing your son for his development. He probably ignores your son during practice too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You pay $3000 for your kid to play soccer? OMG!!! What a racket.

I’m a PP with a kid that does rec. This is why we don’t do travel, it’s all a big scam but so many people fall for it. It’s madness.

I don’t love it but to be fair we’ve played rec, tryout leagues, travel-lite, travel and high school. There is a difference. It’s not always for college-hopes (we don’t have them). For us, the high price is worth it to keep skills growing and get training/coaching and ensure he makes the school team each yeah, which is a big social and leadership benefit.

But at 9 I agree it can wait.

[Anonymous]

My daughter plays for a U12 team and she would play the entire game most of the time, but for the past couple games she has been playing less than everyone else in the team (she is in travel).And let me make it clear she isn’t the best player on the team but she is pretty close. The person he replaced her with (she was already on the team) is definitely not better than her. She is one of the fastest players on the team and that person he replaced her with is one of the slowest.Soccer is meant to be fun and I don’t enjoy the fact that my daughter cry’s on the car rides home. My daughter’s team has pretty high costs too, around 3k and it is her first time in travel. She wanted to do it for another season because her friend is going to try out but today when she was crying in the car she finalized her decision and isn’t going to be playing in that team anymore. My daughter has severe anxiety and if this is making it worse to the point that she cries herself to sleep I don’t want to do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter plays for a U12 team and she would play the entire game most of the time, but for the past couple games she has been playing less than everyone else in the team (she is in travel).And let me make it clear she isn’t the best player on the team but she is pretty close. The person he replaced her with (she was already on the team) is definitely not better than her. She is one of the fastest players on the team and that person he replaced her with is one of the slowest.Soccer is meant to be fun and I don’t enjoy the fact that my daughter cry’s on the car rides home. My daughter’s team has pretty high costs too, around 3k and it is her first time in travel. She wanted to do it for another season because her friend is going to try out but today when she was crying in the car she finalized her decision and isn’t going to be playing in that team anymore. My daughter has severe anxiety and if this is making it worse to the point that she cries herself to sleep I don’t want to do it.

[Anonymous]

Cool story

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter plays for a U12 team and she would play the entire game most of the time, but for the past couple games she has been playing less than everyone else in the team (she is in travel).And let me make it clear she isn’t the best player on the team but she is pretty close. The person he replaced her with (she was already on the team) is definitely not better than her. She is one of the fastest players on the team and that person he replaced her with is one of the slowest.Soccer is meant to be fun and I don’t enjoy the fact that my daughter cry’s on the car rides home. My daughter’s team has pretty high costs too, around 3k and it is her first time in travel. She wanted to do it for another season because her friend is going to try out but today when she was crying in the car she finalized her decision and isn’t going to be playing in that team anymore. My daughter has severe anxiety and if this is making it worse to the point that she cries herself to sleep I don’t want to do it.

I suggest that you calmly ask the coach what was behind his decision. Your DD might be the fastest, but is she out of position most of the time, or other reasons??? It could be that the coach wanted to equalize some playing time too. It is always good to know the reason so your DD can further improve.

Also, use this opportunity for motivation for your DD to be an even much better player.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter plays for a U12 team and she would play the entire game most of the time, but for the past couple games she has been playing less than everyone else in the team (she is in travel).And let me make it clear she isn’t the best player on the team but she is pretty close. The person he replaced her with (she was already on the team) is definitely not better than her. She is one of the fastest players on the team and that person he replaced her with is one of the slowest.Soccer is meant to be fun and I don’t enjoy the fact that my daughter cry’s on the car rides home. My daughter’s team has pretty high costs too, around 3k and it is her first time in travel. She wanted to do it for another season because her friend is going to try out but today when she was crying in the car she finalized her decision and isn’t going to be playing in that team anymore. My daughter has severe anxiety and if this is making it worse to the point that she cries herself to sleep I don’t want to do it.

I suggest that you calmly ask the coach what was behind his decision. Your DD might be the fastest, but is she out of position most of the time, or other reasons??? It could be that the coach wanted to equalize some playing time too. It is always good to know the reason so your DD can further improve.

Also, use this opportunity for motivation for your DD to be an even much better player.

Yeah this is a much different situation than the kid that just gets in for 5 minutes. This happens. This is a moment to teach your kid resiliency not quit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter plays for a U12 team and she would play the entire game most of the time, but for the past couple games she has been playing less than everyone else in the team (she is in travel).And let me make it clear she isn’t the best player on the team but she is pretty close. The person he replaced her with (she was already on the team) is definitely not better than her. She is one of the fastest players on the team and that person he replaced her with is one of the slowest.Soccer is meant to be fun and I don’t enjoy the fact that my daughter cry’s on the car rides home. My daughter’s team has pretty high costs too, around 3k and it is her first time in travel. She wanted to do it for another season because her friend is going to try out but today when she was crying in the car she finalized her decision and isn’t going to be playing in that team anymore. My daughter has severe anxiety and if this is making it worse to the point that she cries herself to sleep I don’t want to do it.

I suggest that you calmly ask the coach what was behind his decision. Your DD might be the fastest, but is she out of position most of the time, or other reasons??? It could be that the coach wanted to equalize some playing time too. It is always good to know the reason so your DD can further improve.

Also, use this opportunity for motivation for your DD to be an even much better player.

Most likely, the other kid’s parents complained to the coach, director etc. seen it a million times.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter plays for a U12 team and she would play the entire game most of the time, but for the past couple games she has been playing less than everyone else in the team (she is in travel).And let me make it clear she isn’t the best player on the team but she is pretty close. The person he replaced her with (she was already on the team) is definitely not better than her. She is one of the fastest players on the team and that person he replaced her with is one of the slowest.Soccer is meant to be fun and I don’t enjoy the fact that my daughter cry’s on the car rides home. My daughter’s team has pretty high costs too, around 3k and it is her first time in travel. She wanted to do it for another season because her friend is going to try out but today when she was crying in the car she finalized her decision and isn’t going to be playing in that team anymore. My daughter has severe anxiety and if this is making it worse to the point that she cries herself to sleep I don’t want to do it.

I suggest that you calmly ask the coach what was behind his decision. Your DD might be the fastest, but is she out of position most of the time, or other reasons??? It could be that the coach wanted to equalize some playing time too. It is always good to know the reason so your DD can further improve.

Also, use this opportunity for motivation for your DD to be an even much better player.

Most likely, the other kid’s parents complained to the coach, director etc. seen it a million times.

Or …. At practice and games … the player simply outworked and outplayed the other …

Often coaches figure out which players complement each other and which compliment themselves

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter plays for a U12 team and she would play the entire game most of the time, but for the past couple games she has been playing less than everyone else in the team (she is in travel).And let me make it clear she isn’t the best player on the team but she is pretty close. The person he replaced her with (she was already on the team) is definitely not better than her. She is one of the fastest players on the team and that person he replaced her with is one of the slowest.Soccer is meant to be fun and I don’t enjoy the fact that my daughter cry’s on the car rides home. My daughter’s team has pretty high costs too, around 3k and it is her first time in travel. She wanted to do it for another season because her friend is going to try out but today when she was crying in the car she finalized her decision and isn’t going to be playing in that team anymore. My daughter has severe anxiety and if this is making it worse to the point that she cries herself to sleep I don’t want to do it.

I suggest that you calmly ask the coach what was behind his decision. Your DD might be the fastest, but is she out of position most of the time, or other reasons??? It could be that the coach wanted to equalize some playing time too. It is always good to know the reason so your DD can further improve.

Also, use this opportunity for motivation for your DD to be an even much better player.

Most likely, the other kid’s parents complained to the coach, director etc. seen it a million times.

Or …. At practice and games … the player simply outworked and outplayed the other …

Often coaches figure out which players complement each other and which compliment themselves

But this is only U11. Still lots of dribble until one loses the ball at this age. For the OP, it is true that as the kids get older, it's more a team sport and making the "right" decisions, not being the fastest runner on the field.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter plays for a U12 team and she would play the entire game most of the time, but for the past couple games she has been playing less than everyone else in the team (she is in travel).And let me make it clear she isn’t the best player on the team but she is pretty close. The person he replaced her with (she was already on the team) is definitely not better than her. She is one of the fastest players on the team and that person he replaced her with is one of the slowest.Soccer is meant to be fun and I don’t enjoy the fact that my daughter cry’s on the car rides home. My daughter’s team has pretty high costs too, around 3k and it is her first time in travel. She wanted to do it for another season because her friend is going to try out but today when she was crying in the car she finalized her decision and isn’t going to be playing in that team anymore. My daughter has severe anxiety and if this is making it worse to the point that she cries herself to sleep I don’t want to do it.

I suggest that you calmly ask the coach what was behind his decision. Your DD might be the fastest, but is she out of position most of the time, or other reasons??? It could be that the coach wanted to equalize some playing time too. It is always good to know the reason so your DD can further improve.

Also, use this opportunity for motivation for your DD to be an even much better player.

Yeah this is a much different situation than the kid that just gets in for 5 minutes. This happens. This is a moment to teach your kid resiliency not quit.

+1 this is within the range of normal when it comes to competitive youth sports. It sucks but tbh crying after every practice and crying to sleep every nite it is a bit dramatic—st least for a kid wo anxiety. If DD has severe anxiety then I hope she is already seeing a child therapist cause this is exactly the kind of thing they can be very helpful for.