Going on vacations during the toddler/baby years -- yay or nay

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve on the whole enjoyed every trip except 1-2.5 years old. To me that is the least pleasant. Because you have to be on top of them every second and their sleep is messed up and they barely enjoy the new experiences anyway.

Under 1 is reasonably easy to tote along and 2.5+ is easier to manage and more fun.

Yup this. That said, we do a family vacation every year regardless of age. We do grandparent trips too but those are really different. With two working parents, our family vacations are super special and important to us because we get bonded in ways we don’t from a weekend at home/in our routine. They won’t remember it but I do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH and I used to be avid travelers but we are currently in the thick of the baby/toddler years -- our first is 2.5 and our second is just 6 months. We've heard conflicting opinions about whether traveling with the kids is "worth it" during this time. I totally know that traveling with babies/toddlers is not a vacation but I think experiencing new things with them is still important. Maybe we don't spend big $$$ on a trip to Asia with the kids under 3, but a non-stop flight to the Caribbean or out west, maybe?

How do you/did you approach travel when kids were young? Spend the money and take the stress or just stay home?

Really depends on the kid. Agree with the poster that said 2.5 and 6 mos are good ages. I think walking age up until age 2 sucks for travel.

[Anonymous]

I just took my 1yo and 3yo on our first “vacation” (flying to NYC for a wedding; total of 3 days) that wasn’t visiting the grandparents. I actually had a great time? Super stressful of course because you’re parenting without the structure of your usual safe space and routine but still fun. I think my key takeaways were:
- don’t spend money on anything expensive; the holiday in we stayed at was safe, kid-friendly, offered breakfast included in the room price downstairs, the most exciting meal they had was airport pizza not the fancy rehearsal dinner spread, etc.
- reset your expectations of your trip: you are not going to X to see museums or architecture or do activities; you are going on a tour of the local playgrounds, ice cream shops, parks, and pools. Maybe a children’s museum or science center.
- if you can possibly avoid driving not having to handle the car seats is a delight; if you’re going to NYC specifically try to avoid bringing a stroller and at least bring one that collapses if you must because many places don’t have elevators (this is probably true is many older cities in the world)

[Anonymous]

Our best under-4 vacations have been within driving distance and included pools. We stayed at an AirBnB with friends who also had toddlers... it had a great outdoor pool. We played all day in the pool and at night the parents could make nice dinners and have wine. It was lovely. We also did a trip with just our family to a kid-oriented hotel on the Eastern Shore and it was great. Again, spent two days in the pool, lots of kids dining at the restaurants so it wasn't a big deal or stressful when our two (1 & 3 at the time) acted like toddlers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH and I used to be avid travelers but we are currently in the thick of the baby/toddler years -- our first is 2.5 and our second is just 6 months. We've heard conflicting opinions about whether traveling with the kids is "worth it" during this time. I totally know that traveling with babies/toddlers is not a vacation but I think experiencing new things with them is still important. Maybe we don't spend big $$$ on a trip to Asia with the kids under 3, but a non-stop flight to the Caribbean or out west, maybe?

How do you/did you approach travel when kids were young? Spend the money and take the stress or just stay home?

I think the answer depends on your level of tolerance for dealing with the extra effort of dragging two kids on adventures you want to do, and your kids' tolerance for disruption. People have different temperaments, and some adults/kids can go with the flow, while some really need their routines or it's a nightmare all around.

Only you know how much band-width your have for crabby kids, or how much band-width they have for being out of routines.

From my experience, at that age, it's best to take vacations where you have a "home-like" base (i.e. condo or house) where you can put the kids down for their naps and the adults can still be doing things in other rooms; and where you have access to a kitchen. Get out and do things, but keep a more regular routine. But, we are people (adults) who do not have a huge amount of patience for disruption, and our kids are the same.

[Anonymous]

Nay. It's too much trouble and creates even more work than being at home.

[Anonymous]

For certain ages, taking a trip with a toddler was just parenting 100% of the time with no help from supportive people back home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve on the whole enjoyed every trip except 1-2.5 years old. To me that is the least pleasant. Because you have to be on top of them every second and their sleep is messed up and they barely enjoy the new experiences anyway.

Under 1 is reasonably easy to tote along and 2.5+ is easier to manage and more fun.

This was my exact experience too. Once my oldest was about 2.5-3 and the younger was like 6-12 months old, we could do some trips with plane travel b/c the oldest could somewhat listen and stay near us, and the baby could be toted.

But I found about 18-30 months is basically the worst. They don’t really want to sleep in the pack n play, but a bed is tough too b/c they can just get up and climb out. They’re too young for melatonin to help reset their sleep schedule. They have no attention span and are constantly trying to kill themselves in any way possible. I wouldn’t do it unless you have grandparent help or a nanny going with you. You’re better off just taking time off work while they’re at daycare or with nanny to do little day trips just the adults.

As the parent of a 13 month-old this post fills me with dread. I've already experienced the change from the relative breeze of travelling with a 2- or 5-month old, to how exhausting it was just to visit my parents last week. But it didn't help that he had gotten sick beforehand which messed up his sleep. Crossing my fingers our beach trip later this summer goes okay. Maybe it'll be helpful that he's not walking yet?

[Anonymous]

We did a Montego Bay all inclusive with a 3 and 5 yo and highly recommend that.
Direct flight and tons to do at the resort, super easy. Otherwise we did local beaches and a couple city trips to NYC, Philly, Boston and to visit relatives. We only started doing bigger trips when they were 7 and 9 and could pull their own suitcases 😊

[Anonymous]

For us, yes it was totally worth it. We got to know what kind of travelers are kids were, they learn to adapt to changes in time, schedules, foods. We had to modify what we did and where we went. It took more planning but now are kids are in college and they are very comfortable and capable travelers. They love going places and they share their memories of our trips together. So like I said for us, it was totally worth it.

[Anonymous]

We still traveled to European cities and had fun.

[Anonymous]

I think this is really dependent on your kids. We did a ton of traveling to see family (generally by car) and it was worth it but was more of a trip than a vacation. We also went to the beach a few times, which was well worth it, but again, not a vacation! I would never switch time zones with kids that age but it's also not in our budget so purely hypothetical for me!

[Anonymous]

Our family is spread out across the US, Europe and Asia - since our older family couldn't travel to us - we travelled to them with our infants and young kids. It might not always be a "vacation" but you find a way to make it work. For us we liked renting houses or apartments that had different bedrooms and a kitchen. It made it easier for naps, making food, etc. We didn't get to "do" as much as pre-kids but seeing and doing things with them - at their pace and as they grew older enjoying their experiences was so wonderful. We changed time zones, we did long car rides etc. Its not always perfect, but we found ways to enjoy the trips. I have friends that waited and honestly as they get older it can often be harder for kids to adapt to travel.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve on the whole enjoyed every trip except 1-2.5 years old. To me that is the least pleasant. Because you have to be on top of them every second and their sleep is messed up and they barely enjoy the new experiences anyway.

Under 1 is reasonably easy to tote along and 2.5+ is easier to manage and more fun.

This was my exact experience too. Once my oldest was about 2.5-3 and the younger was like 6-12 months old, we could do some trips with plane travel b/c the oldest could somewhat listen and stay near us, and the baby could be toted.

But I found about 18-30 months is basically the worst. They don’t really want to sleep in the pack n play, but a bed is tough too b/c they can just get up and climb out. They’re too young for melatonin to help reset their sleep schedule. They have no attention span and are constantly trying to kill themselves in any way possible. I wouldn’t do it unless you have grandparent help or a nanny going with you. You’re better off just taking time off work while they’re at daycare or with nanny to do little day trips just the adults.

As the parent of a 13 month-old this post fills me with dread. I've already experienced the change from the relative breeze of travelling with a 2- or 5-month old, to how exhausting it was just to visit my parents last week. But it didn't help that he had gotten sick beforehand which messed up his sleep. Crossing my fingers our beach trip later this summer goes okay. Maybe it'll be helpful that he's not walking yet?

I’m the PP. You might be okay. Young toddlers are still somewhat slow even once walking. And hopefully still unable to climb out of the pack n play. Just keep expectations low, don’t book any nice restaurants, and hope for the best! Each kid is different too, so yours may be a good beach baby.

Oh and I’ll add that we went to the beach once with a 13 month old and brought a little baby pool to fill with water on the beach so we could set him in it to play without having to be in the ocean. Plus a shady canopy and some sand castle toys.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I prefer to spend the money on couples trips so I can invest in my marriage.

Selfish and gross. Having said that, who do you dump your kids on?

It’s selfish and gross to go on trips with my husband?