He is missing out on so much and is definitely poorer (not financially) than he would be if he embraced both cultures at the same time |
My kids are mixed but I teach them to classify as Chinese-American. Partly because I've lived in many places in the world, people look at you and make an assumption. It's better to have some knowledge of heritage/culture for those places even in the US where someone looks and thinks, not one of us. |
Why do all Europeans need to speak English? The majority don't. |
Sorry but you sound kind of of obnoxious. I’m guessing you’re the European person who forces their kids to learn? Unfortunately not all cultures are viewed equally in the US. When I was growing up I didn’t want to learn Chinese, I wanted to learn French. I never felt superior to anyone because I knew the language or understood the culture. Lots of Chinese kids I knew who grew up in places with few Asians had identity crises. They wanted to be more American, not be proud Chinese people. So don’t just assume that it’s in every kids’ best interest for their parents to impose their culture/language on their kid or otherwise are “lax”. Just shows your lack of empathy and understanding for things actually work in this country. |
Dollars to donuts fool |
I am not, but I am European. My husband is from a country in Latin America and feels exactly the same way. My kids are not forced to learn anything and are super proud of having 3 passports and speaking 3 languages (mostly fluently). We/our friends/schools/place of work all celebrate different heritages (including Chinese). My daughters go to school with a few Asian kids (second generation) and are all proud of their heritage (though I am not sure if they speak the language. While 100 years ago “my people” only wanted to be American when they moved here, today speaking multiple languages and having multiple heritages is seen as something to be proud of. I definitely see it as an added quality. The PP choice of word “superior” was wrong in my opinion, but I think she meant “superior to what they would be if they did not embrace their heritage”. I agree with PP that even if you need to force them a bit it’s a good idea. We force our kids to do many things I donMt see why learning a language is different. |
It’s a typical ABC attitude |
All the educated ones do. |
Not wanting to learn Chinese is a typical attitude? |
This is not true. In southern Europe (including France) not all educated people speak English. My dad is a doctor and my mom Ahmad an MBA and they can get by in the US, but their English is far from good. Great for my kids because they have to speak our language with my parents. |
The majority of educated Europeans speak English because it is advantageous for career advancement, travel, etc. If you are German, for example, and want to travel to Italy, Spain, France or Scandinavia, you’ll be fairly hard pressed to find people who can communicate with you in your native language. Instead of trying to learn dozens of other European languages to get around the continent you can simply learn English and at minimum in most urban areas you’ll be fine. Similarly many international meetings/business conferences, etc are conducted predominantly in English. |
It sounds like OP’s kids aren’t proud of their heritage, perhaps? The question is what to do when your kids aren’t into learning your language or about your heritage. |
It’s non negotiable like school, shower, homework, etc |
Indian way or the highway? |
European again. It’s ok if you want to let your kids do whatever they want and make bad decision. I want different and better for mine. |