And why exactly does a PARENT need to be so involved in comparing times that they are posting on an online forum? I would get a million dollars that neither Katie Ledecky’s parents nor Michael Phelps’ mother ever engaged in such behavior. I’m guessing they got their kids to practices, chères for them at meets, and let coaches worry about the rest. Parents like OP drive their children out of the sport because. Kids are not dumb and something that was wrong now their thing can turn I to something they’re doing to avoid their parents’ disappointment very quickly. I can’t imagine being a coach on this area and in this era of youth sports. Parents need to back waaaay off. This behavior is so much more likely to hurt than help. |
Sorry for typos fixed them above |
NCSA AGE GROUP CHAMPS started in 2016, is this PVS CHAMPS? Not really an appropriate comparison for what comes of the 12yos. |
Swim parents with phones are the worst. They love to compare their kid to others. As an older parent, my advice is to stay away from the parents I. The stands and support your kids by volunteering to time. |
As a former competitive swimmer, let me tell you OP that you are definitely That Mom, and the swimmers definitely catch on to it, and make fun of you and are weirded out by you. You’re not doing your kids any favors, believe me. Your reputation as That Mom will carry over onto them if you’re not careful.
It’s one thing when you come over to see your parents and someone else’s mom says, “Great job, Sarah!” Or “Hey, what’s your next event today?” It’s another thing when That Mom makes a pouty face and says, “Awwww, that’s OK Sarah, you’ll get your time down next time” or “Do you know why Coach chose Madison for the relay instead of you?” We knew you and clocked your type from a very young age. Trust and believe. You are fooling exactly no one. |
I was once waiting for my child who swims year-round team and a group of moms had a printed-out list of all the kids, their time, and comparing/criticizing them. It was so sad.
I'm just excited when my kid doesn't come in last. They like swimming and that's all that matters to me. |
They are the ones who refuse to save for college and expect their kids to get full scholarships. |
Some of this is just the current lay of the land, so to speak. We are currently boy-heavy at our club. Our large, prominent club had exactly 2 14yo girls at junior nationals, and still only a handful at age groups. Our club happens to have a wealth of fast 14yo boys. Some of it also depends, at least at our club, if the 14yos are 8th or 9th graders. This impacts which training group they are in and which meets they attend. |
This seems like an odd story. I can’t think of anyone who would have a print out of results. |
I’m assuming this was a psych sheet or heat sheet, coaches email them out to parents before the meet. They are usually cumbersome to print out because they can be long, but I’ve seen plenty of parents, especially parents of newer swimmers, print them out. I wouldn’t be surprised to hear parents discussing times, but it’s usually like “oh sally is here, she is so good at backstroke” etc etc. |
Agree, pp hasn't been around swim and posted a big nothingburger. |
From our private, one boy had a guaranteed slot at Princeton from Junior year, or possibly even earlier due to swimming.
By the way, being recruitable for Div 3 is nothing to sneer at in swimming or any other sport. It is hugely reassuring to know that you have an inside track to Tufts or Vassar or Johns Hopkins due to the coach's endorsement, even if you are not a Div 1 recruit to an Ivy. My kids had Div 3 opportunities, thought then eventually chose to go to to other schools. |
This makes sense. This discussion can be completely normal, depending how it happened. For example: Mom 1: look at Cal, seeded fifteenth?! Mom 2: he’ll kill it in his heat. It’s an old time and he’s had a great year so far. Mom 1: poor cal seeded first. Mom 2: I know. It’s a great time but it’s an old time and he’s still easing back in from shoulder surgery. Mom 1: ugh my kid is in the second fastest heat! I think he’s the only one who has done it this year, so his time is new and everyone else’s is old. Mom 1: Poor Cal- he’s been chasing his best 100 fly time for two years. His mom said he hates it because he’s slower that that by a few seconds and keep getting creamed in his heats. |
I print Meet sheets and follow times of all the kids I know. I can’t imagine how boring swim meets are if you didn’t find that fun and interesting.
But I volunteer at a lot of them, because even doing that, they can still get pretty boring. |
For every swim parent who pores over psych sheets, there are an equal number of parents who drop off and don’t attend the meets, parents who alway manage to miss their kids’ events, parents who mean well but take a video of the wrong kid (this has been me more than once), and parents who watch their kids and that’s it. Now that my kids are older and not the youngest age group anymore, I try to volunteer at one session per meet. It makes the time pass quickly and I’m kind of making up for the times when I couldn’t volunteer as much due to having a toddler around, etc. |