Why men love b***ches

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s funny because a lot of this advice is basically “don’t be a doormat,” which means that in our society when a women isn’t acting like a doormat, she’s being a B.

And I’m sure I sound like a man-hater if I say something like this.

As a man, I would not waste my time with a B or with a doormat. Fortunately, most of the women I know, including my incredible wife, are neither. That fact that you think men place women into one category or the other does make you sound a bit like a man hater.

Ha. Thanks for proving my point!

You're welcome, I guess, but sounding like a man hater is not exactly a compliment.

You know, I wasn't sure from your first comment, but based on this one, I am pretty confident you are a misogynist. You misinterpreted my first comment as a personal attack, and then in the second comment, you imply that I should care whether or not a random man is complimenting me.

Since you are making this all about you I'm not going to take the time to break my first comment down, but I do suggest you think less defensively about the place of women in society.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Weird because very single woman I know who went this route ended up married to s manchild she had to mother

I did find the book useful, and I don't think that women who follow the "don't let men BS you and have high standards" route all marry man-children. But, I think the book leaves open that possibility. I admit I haven't read it in a while, but I recall that it has this "you need to keep a man in line" line of thinking. I am the PP who likes that TikTok account that is similar, and her advice is more like "you need to avoid men who need to be kept in line."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I just re-read this classic dating book. It's basically about not being a doormat. If a guy is giving you hot and cold, don't say anything- just walk away.

Do you agree that men secretly love b's?

We love women who have sex with us.

Unless she’s acting clingy and like she’ll do whatever she has to to get you to marry her.

+1. This is why you can’t listen to men on this: they don’t really know what they want until it’s right in front of their face. They do not like clingy and desperate no matter what they say.

Who said he liked clingy and desperate?

He said he loved "women who have sex with us." That's a pretty large category, but men don't realize that. It's like women who will have sex with them but aren't ideal in other ways -- aren't their physical type, have an off-putting personality, or who will accept any kind of treatment because they are desperate -- don't exist. So they think it's all about sex.

Exactly. And younger/less experienced women sometimes hear “we just want women who have sex with us!” and come to the conclusion that all she needs to do to be loved and committed to is have sex (have no boundaries, not stand up for her own emotional needs, etc.) just to keep a man happy. Which is emphatically not the case.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just re-read this classic dating book. It's basically about not being a doormat. If a guy is giving you hot and cold, don't say anything- just walk away.

Do you agree that men secretly love b's?

We love women who have sex with us.

Unless she’s acting clingy and like she’ll do whatever she has to to get you to marry her.

+1. This is why you can’t listen to men on this: they don’t really know what they want until it’s right in front of their face. They do not like clingy and desperate no matter what they say.

Who said he liked clingy and desperate?

He said he loved "women who have sex with us." That's a pretty large category, but men don't realize that. It's like women who will have sex with them but aren't ideal in other ways -- aren't their physical type, have an off-putting personality, or who will accept any kind of treatment because they are desperate -- don't exist. So they think it's all about sex.

Exactly. And younger/less experienced women sometimes hear “we just want women who have sex with us!” and come to the conclusion that all she needs to do to be loved and committed to is have sex (have no boundaries, not stand up for her own emotional needs, etc.) just to keep a man happy. Which is emphatically not the case.

Ya know, if you push people away by being high maintenance, people will go away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just re-read this classic dating book. It's basically about not being a doormat. If a guy is giving you hot and cold, don't say anything- just walk away.

Do you agree that men secretly love b's?

We love women who have sex with us.

Unless she’s acting clingy and like she’ll do whatever she has to to get you to marry her.

+1. This is why you can’t listen to men on this: they don’t really know what they want until it’s right in front of their face. They do not like clingy and desperate no matter what they say.

Who said he liked clingy and desperate?

He said he loved "women who have sex with us." That's a pretty large category, but men don't realize that. It's like women who will have sex with them but aren't ideal in other ways -- aren't their physical type, have an off-putting personality, or who will accept any kind of treatment because they are desperate -- don't exist. So they think it's all about sex.

Exactly. And younger/less experienced women sometimes hear “we just want women who have sex with us!” and come to the conclusion that all she needs to do to be loved and committed to is have sex (have no boundaries, not stand up for her own emotional needs, etc.) just to keep a man happy. Which is emphatically not the case.

Ya know, if you push people away by being high maintenance, people will go away.

NP. If a guy thinks I'm being high maintenance when I stand up for my emotional needs and don't let him violate my boundaries, that's actually really great because it's a clear signal that I don't want him in my life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just re-read this classic dating book. It's basically about not being a doormat. If a guy is giving you hot and cold, don't say anything- just walk away.

Do you agree that men secretly love b's?

We love women who have sex with us.

Unless she’s acting clingy and like she’ll do whatever she has to to get you to marry her.

+1. This is why you can’t listen to men on this: they don’t really know what they want until it’s right in front of their face. They do not like clingy and desperate no matter what they say.

Who said he liked clingy and desperate?

He said he loved "women who have sex with us." That's a pretty large category, but men don't realize that. It's like women who will have sex with them but aren't ideal in other ways -- aren't their physical type, have an off-putting personality, or who will accept any kind of treatment because they are desperate -- don't exist. So they think it's all about sex.

Exactly. And younger/less experienced women sometimes hear “we just want women who have sex with us!” and come to the conclusion that all she needs to do to be loved and committed to is have sex (have no boundaries, not stand up for her own emotional needs, etc.) just to keep a man happy. Which is emphatically not the case.

Yes. And many men will date women like that, but not consider them marriage material (though they might lead them on). And they might marry them, but just because they are around when a man decides he has come to the point in life when it's time to get married. And then the marriage will suck for her (and probably for him because at some point, she will stop wanting to have sex with a guy who doesn't really and truly respect her).

[Anonymous]

Man here, I read the title and thought "no way, I would never date a b**tch but when you read what it means, I totally agree. Men love the hunt, at least men like me who are successful and ambitious. It's more about having seeing someone have value and wanting to get that, realizing she has options other than me. Perhaps it's primal.

This does NOT equate into being a b***ch, or being rude or petty or controlling. Those are massive turn-off behaviors and not someone I want to be with. You can be both chill but also have standards

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s funny because a lot of this advice is basically “don’t be a doormat,” which means that in our society when a women isn’t acting like a doormat, she’s being a B.

And I’m sure I sound like a man-hater if I say something like this.

You are a 100% right. This applies to your job and friendships too. Assertive, confident women are often labeled Bs.

[Anonymous]

Maybe these guys were raised by a B mom and they don't know how to interact any other way. No backbone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Man here, I read the title and thought "no way, I would never date a b**tch but when you read what it means, I totally agree. Men love the hunt, at least men like me who are successful and ambitious. It's more about having seeing someone have value and wanting to get that, realizing she has options other than me. Perhaps it's primal.

This does NOT equate into being a b***ch, or being rude or petty or controlling. Those are massive turn-off behaviors and not someone I want to be with. You can be both chill but also have standards

Lol. No guy write this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just re-read this classic dating book. It's basically about not being a doormat. If a guy is giving you hot and cold, don't say anything- just walk away.

Do you agree that men secretly love b's?

We love women who have sex with us.

The hookers, prostitutes, one-night hook-up girls, the OW that are no-string bangs? Loving sex is different than loving the object you are having it with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just re-read this classic dating book. It's basically about not being a doormat. If a guy is giving you hot and cold, don't say anything- just walk away.

Do you agree that men secretly love b's?

We love women who have sex with us.

Unless she’s acting clingy and like she’ll do whatever she has to to get you to marry her.

+1. This is why you can’t listen to men on this: they don’t really know what they want until it’s right in front of their face. They do not like clingy and desperate no matter what they say.

Who said he liked clingy and desperate?

He said he loved "women who have sex with us." That's a pretty large category, but men don't realize that. It's like women who will have sex with them but aren't ideal in other ways -- aren't their physical type, have an off-putting personality, or who will accept any kind of treatment because they are desperate -- don't exist. So they think it's all about sex.

Exactly. And younger/less experienced women sometimes hear “we just want women who have sex with us!” and come to the conclusion that all she needs to do to be loved and committed to is have sex (have no boundaries, not stand up for her own emotional needs, etc.) just to keep a man happy. Which is emphatically not the case.

Ya know, if you push people away by being high maintenance, people will go away.

NP. If a guy thinks I'm being high maintenance when I stand up for my emotional needs and don't let him violate my boundaries, that's actually really great because it's a clear signal that I don't want him in my life.

+1. Exactly! That’s just being fair and reasonable, not high maintenance!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just re-read this classic dating book. It's basically about not being a doormat. If a guy is giving you hot and cold, don't say anything- just walk away.

Do you agree that men secretly love b's?

We love women who have sex with us.

Unless she’s acting clingy and like she’ll do whatever she has to to get you to marry her.

+1. This is why you can’t listen to men on this: they don’t really know what they want until it’s right in front of their face. They do not like clingy and desperate no matter what they say.

Who said he liked clingy and desperate?

He said he loved "women who have sex with us." That's a pretty large category, but men don't realize that. It's like women who will have sex with them but aren't ideal in other ways -- aren't their physical type, have an off-putting personality, or who will accept any kind of treatment because they are desperate -- don't exist. So they think it's all about sex.

Exactly. And younger/less experienced women sometimes hear “we just want women who have sex with us!” and come to the conclusion that all she needs to do to be loved and committed to is have sex (have no boundaries, not stand up for her own emotional needs, etc.) just to keep a man happy. Which is emphatically not the case.

Ya know, if you push people away by being high maintenance, people will go away.

NP. If a guy thinks I'm being high maintenance when I stand up for my emotional needs and don't let him violate my boundaries, that's actually really great because it's a clear signal that I don't want him in my life.

+1. Exactly! That’s just being fair and reasonable, not high maintenance!

+2, thought the same when I read the "pushed away" quote

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just re-read this classic dating book. It's basically about not being a doormat. If a guy is giving you hot and cold, don't say anything- just walk away.

Do you agree that men secretly love b's?

We love women who have sex with us.

Unless she’s acting clingy and like she’ll do whatever she has to to get you to marry her.

+1. This is why you can’t listen to men on this: they don’t really know what they want until it’s right in front of their face. They do not like clingy and desperate no matter what they say.

Who said he liked clingy and desperate?

He said he loved "women who have sex with us." That's a pretty large category, but men don't realize that. It's like women who will have sex with them but aren't ideal in other ways -- aren't their physical type, have an off-putting personality, or who will accept any kind of treatment because they are desperate -- don't exist. So they think it's all about sex.

Exactly. And younger/less experienced women sometimes hear “we just want women who have sex with us!” and come to the conclusion that all she needs to do to be loved and committed to is have sex (have no boundaries, not stand up for her own emotional needs, etc.) just to keep a man happy. Which is emphatically not the case.

Ya know, if you push people away by being high maintenance, people will go away.

NP. If a guy thinks I'm being high maintenance when I stand up for my emotional needs and don't let him violate my boundaries, that's actually really great because it's a clear signal that I don't want him in my life.

+1. Exactly! That’s just being fair and reasonable, not high maintenance!

Who claimed he wants to “violate boundaries”? Why are you all making up weird stuff?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am also an old married lady who never read the book and recently discovered reddit FDS (female dating strategy). While I don't agree a lot of their tactics (make sure the man pays, etc), essentially their main messages seems to be 1) Do not tolerate bad behavior and have standards and 2) Be able to take of yourself financially and do not rely on a man.

Honestly any women who is not a b***ch at least some of the time is just a target for predators, abusers, and controlling a$$**les. I have a very sweet nature and learned that it is in my interest to act be assertive, no BS, and direct when dating to weed out the jerks.

Oof, I get that FDS may have some good underlying aspects to it, but it is such a cesspool.