Snow week is giving me PTSD of lockdown

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Help me re-set. I had off for 2 weeks for winter break so kept the kids out of daycare so we could see family. Figured everybody would be back in school/daycare on Monday but of course the storm has hit and we are all stuck inside together. It is giving me flashbacks from lockdown in March 2020. I was in a horrible place and was screaming at my kids non-stop and needed to go on meds and start therapy. How do I not go back down that deep dark rabbit hole? I am working full time, as is my husband, and we have 3 kids at home who are sick and tired of being together. It is non-stop yelling. I feel horrible.

Parenting during a pandemic is extremely hard. You should take your own mental health seriously and get back into therapy and maybe meds, if you aren't already.

In my experience it also helps to just ease up on your expectations for yourself and your family. My husband and I stopped arguing over chores because I just stopped giving a crap. I do the bare minimum each night to keep the house from being disgusting and we both put in some extra work on days when we are feeling energized, but if we go a few days without vacuuming or mopping, I don't care. We bought my baby extra pjs so we could do laundry less often. I would have scoffed if you suggested that to me two years ago, but at this point anything that makes our lives slightly easier is fine. My 4 year old watches more tv than I like, but he's thriving anyway and it helps us get by on harder days.

Stop caring so much about the things that don't actually matter (which is most things), and you'll find it all easier.

[Anonymous]

" My 4 year old watches more tv than I like, but he's thriving anyway and it helps us get by on harder days."

this is me right now too.

whatever you need to do, do it. center yourself.

[Anonymous]

Working from home while watching kids is hard. Don't let anyone make you feel bad for having a hard time with it. I took off work. Employers should expect employees to call out on snow days. Yes, we had to WFH+ full-time provide child care during virtual school, but let's not normalize it more than necessary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is on you, OP. You need to talk to your doctor again, and learn some parenting skills pronto. No parent yells at their kids all day - I know, I have a son with special needs who is behaviorally challenged and sometimes all I want to do is scream at him.

You aren't someone who is in a position to lecture others about how to model good behavior, based on evidence presented.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Help me re-set. I had off for 2 weeks for winter break so kept the kids out of daycare so we could see family. Figured everybody would be back in school/daycare on Monday but of course the storm has hit and we are all stuck inside together. It is giving me flashbacks from lockdown in March 2020. I was in a horrible place and was screaming at my kids non-stop and needed to go on meds and start therapy. How do I not go back down that deep dark rabbit hole? I am working full time, as is my husband, and we have 3 kids at home who are sick and tired of being together. It is non-stop yelling. I feel horrible.

So is everyone else in this area and, yet, somehow we manage. I suggest you get your act together as you are an adult and, as such, step up and take care of the curve balls life throws at us WITHOUT COMPLAINING. You and your husband are employed, have ample money, the necessities and, probably, a great many of the luxuries the world has to offer. I am so sick of people like you and your incessant whining and complaining.

So apparently this is this person‘s way of mitigating their stress. being a deep deep deep a hole online. Awesome. Really hope they don’t have children.

+1

Except for where I worry about OP taking these idiots seriously, it's kind of funny to observe the total lack of introspection from people like the PP. The unintentional irony is quite something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get some parenting help. We never had a real lockdown.

I don't know where you live, but here in the DMV, schools were virtual from March 2020 until September 2021.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Help me re-set. I had off for 2 weeks for winter break so kept the kids out of daycare so we could see family. Figured everybody would be back in school/daycare on Monday but of course the storm has hit and we are all stuck inside together. It is giving me flashbacks from lockdown in March 2020. I was in a horrible place and was screaming at my kids non-stop and needed to go on meds and start therapy. How do I not go back down that deep dark rabbit hole? I am working full time, as is my husband, and we have 3 kids at home who are sick and tired of being together. It is non-stop yelling. I feel horrible.

So is everyone else in this area and, yet, somehow we manage. I suggest you get your act together as you are an adult and, as such, step up and take care of the curve balls life throws at us WITHOUT COMPLAINING. You and your husband are employed, have ample money, the necessities and, probably, a great many of the luxuries the world has to offer. I am so sick of people like you and your incessant whining and complaining.

So apparently this is this person‘s way of mitigating their stress. being a deep deep deep a hole online. Awesome. Really hope they don’t have children.

+1

Except for where I worry about OP taking these idiots seriously, it's kind of funny to observe the total lack of introspection from people like the PP. The unintentional irony is quite something.

+2 Pro tip: people who actually are thriving don’t need to repeatedly shout I’M THRIVING on anonymous websites.

OP, I started a daily meditation habit as a way to stop yelling at my kids, way back in May 2020. I’m still shocked at how well it works, at least for me. Ideally I’d do two ten minute meditations daily (one am, one pm), but even one daily or two five minute meditations helps a ton.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Advocating for better policies is my current coping mechanism.

A group of us in the area is advocating for updating COVID-19 daycare policies to decrease the crushing quarantine burden and enable optional masking for children. Please see below for our advocacy guides and petition.

Montgomery County daycare advocacy guide: https://tinyurl.com/yd2jr5pu

DC daycare advocacy guide: https://tinyurl.com/57sapzjy

Petition: https://chng.it/vTzRTQKGHf

Y'all should consider NoVa advocacy too!

Yes I'm sorry we haven't done so yet! But it shouldn't be difficult to locate the appropriate NoVa public officials and make the same case to them. Also, my understanding is that most of NoVa already allows optional masking in daycares, which we are fighting for here in D.C. and MoCo.

We do, thank God, but I would love a reprieve from 14-day quarantines.

That is the most urgent need right now. I'm hearing from parents facing back-to-back 2 week quarantines. A single mom who has to choose between caring for her children and keeping her job. Our livelihoods are seriously at risk and we're trying to encourage a major push on this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have any good advice. But I’m hiding in my basement right now with the TV on upstairs. I’ll regret it later regards to whatever is happening up there but it’s nice to have a minute of quiet.

Don't feel guilty. I do this too (hide in my bedroom) and let the kids watch TV or ipad. We all need a break. The kids will be fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Help me re-set. I had off for 2 weeks for winter break so kept the kids out of daycare so we could see family. Figured everybody would be back in school/daycare on Monday but of course the storm has hit and we are all stuck inside together. It is giving me flashbacks from lockdown in March 2020. I was in a horrible place and was screaming at my kids non-stop and needed to go on meds and start therapy. How do I not go back down that deep dark rabbit hole? I am working full time, as is my husband, and we have 3 kids at home who are sick and tired of being together. It is non-stop yelling. I feel horrible.

So is everyone else in this area and, yet, somehow we manage. I suggest you get your act together as you are an adult and, as such, step up and take care of the curve balls life throws at us WITHOUT COMPLAINING. You and your husband are employed, have ample money, the necessities and, probably, a great many of the luxuries the world has to offer. I am so sick of people like you and your incessant whining and complaining.

So apparently this is this person‘s way of mitigating their stress. being a deep deep deep a hole online. Awesome. Really hope they don’t have children.

+1

Except for where I worry about OP taking these idiots seriously, it's kind of funny to observe the total lack of introspection from people like the PP. The unintentional irony is quite something.

+2 Pro tip: people who actually are thriving don’t need to repeatedly shout I’M THRIVING on anonymous websites.

OP, I started a daily meditation habit as a way to stop yelling at my kids, way back in May 2020. I’m still shocked at how well it works, at least for me. Ideally I’d do two ten minute meditations daily (one am, one pm), but even one daily or two five minute meditations helps a ton.

OP this PP here is wise!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do whatever you need to get through the next few days - unlimited TV, take out, breakfast for dinner, extra dessert for behaving, etc. These few days aren't a referendum on your parenting; just get through it. And stay off social media!

NP. As a parent -- the post above is right. "These few days aren't a referendum on your parenting" is so very correct. Be sure your DH is on board, though, so you don't get side eye from him for "being so lax" or "too much TV" or whatever.

And the rude poster at the start of the thread did have one good idea, OP, if I can gently second it. Contact your therapist. The sudden change in expectations (I know! So much snow after a 60-degree weekend....) was tough for a lot of parents, but being slammed with such intense feelings about it is not good, as you already know; so reach out to your therapist again. The pandemic has sucked away all resilience from many folks and it's OK to admit you're reeling, but you should reach out and tell the therapist about it and review some coping strategies for next time. And recognize that unfortunately there will be a next time, between covid closures and wild weather. But meanwhile, it's fine to do whatever you need to do to cope.

[Anonymous]

I understand how you feel, OP. I

[Anonymous]

I am with you OP. I am at the end of my rope and it really seems like there is no relief in sight. I am so burnt out at work and am a shell of my former parenting self. I really wish I could quit but I carry our insurance. Something’s gotta give

[Anonymous]

You need a baby sitter. I have 2 teenagers in my neighborhood who are also off school and sick of their families. You need to be friendly with them. They can take the kids sledding, just for a walk, make smores in the fire pit OUTSIDE etc.

We also trade off with neighbors nearby. I watch the kids in the morning and they go to her house in the PM.

This is WAY easier than 2020 because I understand the covid risks and we are all vaccinated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You need a baby sitter. I have 2 teenagers in my neighborhood who are also off school and sick of their families. You need to be friendly with them. They can take the kids sledding, just for a walk, make smores in the fire pit OUTSIDE etc.

We also trade off with neighbors nearby. I watch the kids in the morning and they go to her house in the PM.

This is WAY easier than 2020 because I understand the covid risks and we are all vaccinated.

OP here- complicating matters we are not all vaccinated. Youngest is under 5 so cannot be vaccinated. With the Omicron surge we are trying to be careful.