Elite 20 College with merit scholarship

[Anonymous]

Op, do you have kids? If yes, are you willing to pay $80,000 a year for them to go to school? Also, you realize that as wonderful as your niece is, there are many many students just like her and being a National Merit Finalist doesn’t guarantee admission into a top twenty school. You are being awfully judgmental of your sister and bil or brother and sil (whatever the relationship is). We can afford to pay anything but of the schools she could get into, not one was worth $80,000. She ended up with a large merit award at a small lac that is not highly ranked but she liked and the cost was the same as public. My brother runs in a circle with very wealthy people and he says that they all feel that they’d rather spend 50,000 for an out of state flagship (or less if their kids get merit at a place like Alabama) than pay $80,000 at some schools. Obviously, there are plenty of people paying the tuition but just as many questioning the value when you can get a good education other places. Now, I’m not talking about turning down Harvard for Indiana. But when you get further down the “list”, you need to do a cost benefit analysis. It seems like your niece’s parents have done that. You aren’t helping the situation as you seem really out of touch with both college costs and how competitive admissions are now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They don't. Except for some schools that have 1-2 extremely competitive merit awards for really extraordinary kids.

If she's open to LACs, I think the highest ranked one that does give significant merit aid is Grinnell.

But, really, I'd encourage her to find things to love about the school giving her a full ride.

Which schools offer the 1-2 extremely competitive merit awards?

My info is from 4 years ago, but Vanderbilt and Emory had a couple of significant merit scholarships. UChicago gave some in $20K range.

[Anonymous]

If Catholic is okay, Notre Dame gives a few merit scholarships.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op, do you have kids? If yes, are you willing to pay $80,000 a year for them to go to school? Also, you realize that as wonderful as your niece is, there are many many students just like her and being a National Merit Finalist doesn’t guarantee admission into a top twenty school. You are being awfully judgmental of your sister and bil or brother and sil (whatever the relationship is). We can afford to pay anything but of the schools she could get into, not one was worth $80,000. She ended up with a large merit award at a small lac that is not highly ranked but she liked and the cost was the same as public. My brother runs in a circle with very wealthy people and he says that they all feel that they’d rather spend 50,000 for an out of state flagship (or less if their kids get merit at a place like Alabama) than pay $80,000 at some schools. Obviously, there are plenty of people paying the tuition but just as many questioning the value when you can get a good education other places. Now, I’m not talking about turning down Harvard for Indiana. But when you get further down the “list”, you need to do a cost benefit analysis. It seems like your niece’s parents have done that. You aren’t helping the situation as you seem really out of touch with both college costs and how competitive admissions are now.

Yeah, pretty much that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:MYOB.

It stands for mind your own business. You aren't helping your niece by trying to thwart your bil/sil. Has she gotten into a T20 school? She most likely will not get in anyway.

[Anonymous]

Her friends aren't wealthier - the OP's niece's parents can afford the cost of tuition but choose not to pay. That's their right and as many of the PPs say, it's not unusual or new. I saw this play out 35 years ago when I was applying to college - it was a real eye-opener in many respects.

I don't agree with the PPs that this is the wiser route, but every family has to make their own decisions. If the OP's niece is so extraordinary and determined, she will have a lot of options. There is a surprising amount of merit aid to be had but for most kids it will require broadening their horizons and considering schools that are less selective than their own stats. That doesn't make those school bad options!

Look at the long thread posted here recently with parents citing the schools where their kids got merit offers. Maybe there are some possibilities that would appeal to your niece there.

[Anonymous]

Here's the thread I just mentioned about merit aid - lots of possibilities! https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1024623.page

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My niece is a high achiever who wants to attend a hard to get in college like most other applicants. She won’t qualify for need based scholarships and her parents won’t pay because she can get free ride at state school as a national merit finalist. They want to be able to pay for education of her younger sisters and their own retirement. They’ve agreed to pay as much as they would’ve at state school if she wasn’t getting a free ride but that only covers half at private colleges. Which top schools offer scholarships to cover full or half cost of attendance. This is causing severe stress for her and rift in family.

If the family has under $300,000 in income, and the parents will fill out aid forms, the niece should apply to Princeton, if she thinks that would be a good fit, because it as great aid for kids from parents with income in the $150,000 to at least $250,000 range.

Other, naturally cheap options: BYU; the Coast Guard Academy (need to be athletic; don’t need a congressional nomination); and English-language bachelor’s programs in the EU. (Maybe $20,000 to $40,000 for a noncitizen all in. See https://www.bachelorsportal.com/articles/2460/study-in-english-in-germany-bachelors-for-students-who-speak-zero-german.html)

- Washington University in St. Louis; Emory.

- Most well-endowed schools below that rank have some merit aid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Her friends aren't wealthier - the OP's niece's parents can afford the cost of tuition but choose not to pay. That's their right and as many of the PPs say, it's not unusual or new. I saw this play out 35 years ago when I was applying to college - it was a real eye-opener in many respects.

I don't agree with the PPs that this is the wiser route, but every family has to make their own decisions. If the OP's niece is so extraordinary and determined, she will have a lot of options. There is a surprising amount of merit aid to be had but for most kids it will require broadening their horizons and considering schools that are less selective than their own stats. That doesn't make those school bad options!

Look at the long thread posted here recently with parents citing the schools where their kids got merit offers. Maybe there are some possibilities that would appeal to your niece there.

I’m confused. Are you the Op?
Don’t count other people’s money.

[Anonymous]

OP, our son is in this position, and I would really rather he go to the state school. It’s much more important to go to the big name school for graduate school than undergrad. If you want to help, help her get excited about the option she has. And absolutely make sure she doesn’t incur debt going to a fancy school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Her friends aren't wealthier - the OP's niece's parents can afford the cost of tuition but choose not to pay. That's their right and as many of the PPs say, it's not unusual or new. I saw this play out 35 years ago when I was applying to college - it was a real eye-opener in many respects.

I don't agree with the PPs that this is the wiser route, but every family has to make their own decisions. If the OP's niece is so extraordinary and determined, she will have a lot of options. There is a surprising amount of merit aid to be had but for most kids it will require broadening their horizons and considering schools that are less selective than their own stats. That doesn't make those school bad options!

Look at the long thread posted here recently with parents citing the schools where their kids got merit offers. Maybe there are some possibilities that would appeal to your niece there.

I’m confused. Are you the Op?
Don’t count other people’s money.

I'm not the OP but that is precisely what the OP said: "She won’t qualify for need based scholarships and her parents won’t pay...." They *could* pay full freight but are choosing not to - which of course is their right. Try reading the OP before you snark.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Her friends aren't wealthier - the OP's niece's parents can afford the cost of tuition but choose not to pay. That's their right and as many of the PPs say, it's not unusual or new. I saw this play out 35 years ago when I was applying to college - it was a real eye-opener in many respects.

I don't agree with the PPs that this is the wiser route, but every family has to make their own decisions. If the OP's niece is so extraordinary and determined, she will have a lot of options. There is a surprising amount of merit aid to be had but for most kids it will require broadening their horizons and considering schools that are less selective than their own stats. That doesn't make those school bad options!

Look at the long thread posted here recently with parents citing the schools where their kids got merit offers. Maybe there are some possibilities that would appeal to your niece there.

What do you mean by "it was a real eye-opener in many respects"?

FWIW, we do not know the totality of the family's responsibilities. If my parent were still alive, we might be steering our kids to instate/significant merit aid LACs because we may need to support my parents (they worked hard and were frugal, but money cannot be squeezed out of small wages) more than we did when they were here. DH's parents are set for some years and should probably not need support from us. Maybe OP's sibling in-laws are in those circumstances. Or have another family member who may always needs some form of financial support (also the case in my family). Finally, I had u/g and grad loans to pay off for some years. Maybe the parents are in those circumstances.

What would really suck? The parents dig into their nest egg, run into trouble in their retirement years, and this very DC just says "oh well."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hard to get but: Davidson, UVA, W&L, Emory, USC

I’m pretty sure USC doesn’t give anything but need-based aid.

[Anonymous]

Does Hopkins still give merit scholarships? They did seven years ago.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does Hopkins still give merit scholarships? They did seven years ago.

Yes