Is this gaslighting?

[Anonymous]

It’s gaslighting. Healthy people would communicate needs. He’d say, sorry I really can’t. Maybe you disagree. The gaslighter will do this in a pattern you notice. It’s not a one-off I didn’t hear you three times, it’s a decade of knowing that prick. Trust your gut.

[Anonymous]

It's of a kind. He's denying an obvious fact (that he heard you) and forcing you to argue with him about reality. He could have just said no, but he's denying an obvious truth to eliminate your standing to complain. He could have just said no, or said afterwards that he was angry so he ignored you.

Now, this doesn't mean that it's nefarious. A lot of people have conflict avoidance strategies that are non-optimal. But it's not great.