Can’t watch tv with husband

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't watch TV with my husband either but that's because he lives in another state. Try that.

Ah, the fallacy of relative privation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t watch football with DH, OP. Should I sob as well?

Do you say I can’t watch black peoples?

Bit of a difference, don't you think? The athletes aren't characters in a story that may or may not be relatable to you.

The whole reason we are seeing more stories with gays, lesbians, etc. is because of a lack of representation in the past. But the converse of that is that a straight, married man might not find those characters to be relatable. That's not bigotry. It's entertainment and it doesn't interest him because he can't relate. That's all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know about this show specifically, but I’ve seen lots of storylines that remind me of afterschool specials. Whether you agree with the message or not, being hit over the head with it like a hammer gets old pretty quickly. If you plan on watching a mystery (or other genre) and end up getting lectured, it’s pretty discouraging.

Most of the network drama shows have been absolutely bending over backwards to write whatever the latest identity/left wing politics into their plots, often in just cringy ways.

Shows like Seinfeld were huge successes because of the strength of their writers and cast, but could never be cast today. (Or for that matter written...) Just imagine trying to pitch a show about a group of straight white friends in NYC.

...but the average American could relate and got the humor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This doesnt appear to be about the TV though. Your husband sounds racist.

+1

Does he have a problem with the same scenarios in real life? When it’s not about just white men? Omg disgusting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t watch football with DH, OP. Should I sob as well?

Do you say I can’t watch black peoples?

Bit of a difference, don't you think? The athletes aren't characters in a story that may or may not be relatable to you.

The whole reason we are seeing more stories with gays, lesbians, etc. is because of a lack of representation in the past. But the converse of that is that a straight, married man might not find those characters to be relatable. That's not bigotry. It's entertainment and it doesn't interest him because he can't relate. That's all.

It isn't just a question of whether audiences can relate, though that is certainly a part of it. Every casting decision, every plot line, everything single thing is now being scrutinized for conformity with political correctness.

Sorry, but that just doesn't promote good writing, nor the best acting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Was watching only murders in the building with him. By episode 5 he is bored and says he doesn’t care about the lesbian cops or Selena Gomez’s love interest.

Ugh it’s so hurtful that I can’t watch anything with him that he seems is too woke or modern with people other than white or men.

Yes, so hurtful. Let’s get you a wambulance.

Classic DCUM, PP: Ignore the real issue the OP is bringing up and just mock the OP. So mature and thoughtful.

The OP's husband apparently has issues with anything that's about people who are unlike him. Betting that's not just about TV shows. But you just want to mock OP because either your reading comprehension is abysmal or you are simply mean. Or both.

OP, is TV the only example of his problem with things not being all about white males?

If that's the problem, then OP buried the lede. You start with "my husband is a homophobic racist." This is a pretty significant charge, so when you provide examples, "bored by lesbian cops on TV" is somewhere pretty far down on the list.

Even so, can you not just roll with it? Maybe she's only now starting to put it together in her head that the problem is values-related and her writing reflects that. Maybe she posted right after it happened so was still agitated when she wrote. Can you just presume that the writing is a reflection of her confusion about this and that's why she's seeking advice?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t watch football with DH, OP. Should I sob as well?

Do you say I can’t watch black peoples?

Bit of a difference, don't you think? The athletes aren't characters in a story that may or may not be relatable to you.

The whole reason we are seeing more stories with gays, lesbians, etc. is because of a lack of representation in the past. But the converse of that is that a straight, married man might not find those characters to be relatable. That's not bigotry. It's entertainment and it doesn't interest him because he can't relate. That's all.

It isn't just a question of whether audiences can relate, though that is certainly a part of it. Every casting decision, every plot line, everything single thing is now being scrutinized for conformity with political correctness.

Sorry, but that just doesn't promote good writing, nor the best acting.

Well, no. That's not true at all. What a strange take.

(I'm the pp who says it's understandable that a straight white man not relate to lesbian characters, but this notion that every Hollywood decision is contorted for political correctness is baseless).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This doesnt appear to be about the TV though. Your husband sounds racist.

+1

Does he have a problem with the same scenarios in real life? When it’s not about just white men? Omg disgusting.

It's not about being racist or white. She is just blaming him and using any excuse she can to make it stick. Playing the race card is pathetic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't watch TV with my husband either but that's because he lives in another state. Try that.

I can't watch tv with my husband because he's in prison. Try that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Was watching only murders in the building with him. By episode 5 he is bored and says he doesn’t care about the lesbian cops or Selena Gomez’s love interest.

Ugh it’s so hurtful that I can’t watch anything with him that he seems is too woke or modern with people other than white or men.

Yes, so hurtful. Let’s get you a wambulance.

Classic DCUM, PP: Ignore the real issue the OP is bringing up and just mock the OP. So mature and thoughtful.

The OP's husband apparently has issues with anything that's about people who are unlike him. Betting that's not just about TV shows. But you just want to mock OP because either your reading comprehension is abysmal or you are simply mean. Or both.

OP, is TV the only example of his problem with things not being all about white males?

If that's the problem, then OP buried the lede. You start with "my husband is a homophobic racist." This is a pretty significant charge, so when you provide examples, "bored by lesbian cops on TV" is somewhere pretty far down on the list.

Even so, can you not just roll with it? Maybe she's only now starting to put it together in her head that the problem is values-related and her writing reflects that. Maybe she posted right after it happened so was still agitated when she wrote. Can you just presume that the writing is a reflection of her confusion about this and that's why she's seeking advice?

Maybe she is just realizing she is a lesbian? It’s happens. She is drawn to these types of shows because they represent what she has repressed for so many years. This is why she identifies so intensely with the show and characters? Her husband’s rejection of the show is a rejection of herself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My spouse gets along great with women, gay people, people of color, etc. in real life, but there tends to be some eye rolling when the show seems to be adding them just for the sake of adding them. I haven't seen "only murders in the building," so no idea whether the lesbian relationship is important to the plot.

I don’t understand. If the neighbor is black or gay, but the plot isn’t about race or sexual orientation, is that adding them just for the sake of adding them? It couldn’t be to reflect the diversity of the world around us, or to represent a variety of viewers rather than just white men?

Some shows are better than others with this. They include diverse characters without making a fuss about it. (No particular rhyme or reason, but one that came to mind was Deadpool 2.) Others have more of a HEY LOOK AT US BEING DIVERSE vibe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't watch TV with my husband either but that's because he lives in another state. Try that.

I can't watch tv with my husband because he's in prison. Try that.

Well, my husband is dead! Clearly I win the false equivalency award.

But I do think he'd enjoy watching 'Bosch' with me. There's enough butch straight-guy stuff like banging hot young women and shoot-outs, along with lesbian cops, black people in positions of power and young male hustlers to make it sizzle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know about this show specifically, but I’ve seen lots of storylines that remind me of afterschool specials. Whether you agree with the message or not, being hit over the head with it like a hammer gets old pretty quickly. If you plan on watching a mystery (or other genre) and end up getting lectured, it’s pretty discouraging.

If you're gay or a person of color, it also gets old pretty quickly to watch shows about straight white people all the time. Minorities are not existing at you. The fact that you take their presence in a show as "being lectured" speaks volumes about you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know about this show specifically, but I’ve seen lots of storylines that remind me of afterschool specials. Whether you agree with the message or not, being hit over the head with it like a hammer gets old pretty quickly. If you plan on watching a mystery (or other genre) and end up getting lectured, it’s pretty discouraging.

Most of the network drama shows have been absolutely bending over backwards to write whatever the latest identity/left wing politics into their plots, often in just cringy ways.

Shows like Seinfeld were huge successes because of the strength of their writers and cast, but could never be cast today. (Or for that matter written...) Just imagine trying to pitch a show about a group of straight white friends in NYC.

...but the average American could relate and got the humor.

The demographics of America have changed significantly since the early 90s. The white population is in decline. These showrunners know what's up, even if you don't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know about this show specifically, but I’ve seen lots of storylines that remind me of afterschool specials. Whether you agree with the message or not, being hit over the head with it like a hammer gets old pretty quickly. If you plan on watching a mystery (or other genre) and end up getting lectured, it’s pretty discouraging.

If you're gay or a person of color, it also gets old pretty quickly to watch shows about straight white people all the time. Minorities are not existing at you. The fact that you take their presence in a show as "being lectured" speaks volumes about you.

The fact that diverse characters ste present doesn’t make me feel lectured to. Will and Grace may have been mostly about white people, but they definitely weren’t all straight, and it didn’t feel like a lecture. They were characters who happened to be gay, but the show was just about them living their lives. Sense8 was a great show that was just about a bunch of people, who happened to be very diverse (and celebrated that diversity), in a premise which may have been a nightmare for the characters, but was entertaining for the audience.

Compare a show like Girlfriends to Different Strokes. Different Strokes is more the type to lecture about diversity (but at least it was designed with that goal in mind), while Girlfriends was an entertaining show with a diverse cast. While I enjoyed Different Strokes and afternoon specials back in the day when I’d come home after school as a kid and watch TV, as an adult, if I’m looking for a mystery, comedy, drama, thriller, etc., I want the plot and characters to be focused on the story and not interrupting the flow to raise my awareness. Just having a storyline promoting tolerance does not equate to good writing. I don’t care as much about their ethnicity, orientation, religion, species (vampires, aliens, etc.), I’m looking to be entertained. If I want to be educated, I’ll seek out a documentary, or maybe just revisit those afterschool specials, where the lectures were at least at intrinsic part of the story and not just a distraction tacked onto the side.