Meeting with Principal before kindergarten - key questions to ask?

[Anonymous]

I'm planning on meeting with our school's principal before my twins start Kindergarten this fall -- largely because I'd like to talk about keeping my twins together vs. in different classrooms.
Are there other questions/ things I should raise in the meeting? Things you wish you'd known about before your kids started school, etc?
Do parents have any input on which teacher their kids will get? I don't want to come across as crazy helicopter parent but do want to be involved and helpful. One of my twins is way ahead of the other - reading chapter books in pre-K so don't know if that's something the school should know in advance, etc.

Thanks for any advice!!

[Anonymous]

Typically, this is something parents do in a letter to the principal in the spring before class assignments are made. You will come across as a PITA if you request a meeting about this. Write a letter, introduce yourself and your twins, give a brief description of your concerns/requests. Most schools have a kindergarten registration session in the spring where the teachers will see that one of your twins is ahead academically. Mine read many grade levels ahead of his age before starting K and I think the school put all of the strong readers in the same class that year.

[Anonymous]

I agree that you should write a letter/e-mail. I know a mom of twins in my neighborhood who requested same class just to make things easier for her rather than darting between two Halloween parties and scheduling volunteer times in two places. In terms of evaluating kids ability..I think the K teachers are quite good at that. Yours will not be the only chapter book reader in the class. Unlike PP's experience, my ES does not group kids by ability at all. They claim they can will meet all children's needs in any class (which is only sometimes true). My DD had her own reading group for the first two years.

[Anonymous]

First PP here. Just make sure you get the letter to the principal by March/April b/c after Spring Break is usually when schools start getting grade level teams together to make up classes for the following year. If there is a K registration/round-up in the spring, that's a good time to send the letter to the principal. They will take the info they get from assessing the incoming K students and start making up class lists. My neighbor's twins were separated even though she wrote a letter to the principal that she wanted them kept together so be prepared that you may not get what you request.

[Anonymous]

All twins are separated at our school. Keeping them together for your convenience probably won't be an option. Twins benefit from having this sort of separation...it helps them develop their own identity. Call the school secretary or go online to find out about kindergarten round up. You will likely receive paperwork ahead of time (if you call the school) and on of the documents will ask you questions about your kids strengths, weaknesses. At our kindergarten round up they photographed the kids and did a quick observation (in groups of 10 or so kids). I imagine they were looking for kids with serious behavior or social issues. You can always submit a letter to the principal along with the kindergarten paperwork you need to submit. People don't tend to meet with the principal. And no, you can't request a certain teacher. I mean, you can, but fat chance you will get what you ask for. Plus, how would you have any clue about the best teachers at the school? You shouldn't rely on commentary from other parents since their two cents has very little to do with hiw your kid will do with a certain teacher.

[Anonymous]

PP where are you located? In Maryland, I think there was a new law passed a few years ago that requires schools to accommodate the wishes of the parents in separating or keeping twins together. Not sure about Va. or DC

[Anonymous]

There was a "twins law" sponsored in the Maryland Senate (I think...) but it has not been enacted. In Virginia, apparently there is one on the books. Who knew?

OP, be prepared to back up your reasoning for keeping them together. I am a K teacher, and based on my experience, I would definitely not support having twins in the same class. Most principals I have ever dealt with feel the same. You haven't really stated your reasons, but you should have some kind of backup, other than "it's easier for me." Maybe have your pediatrician give some input.

You don't need to inform the principal that one of your twins is reading chapter books. In K, everyone comes in with a different skill set and classes are generally not formed based on that. It's more a matter of balancing gender and race/ethnicity. If you're concerned about coming across as a PITA, then for sure leave that part out.

The time to have this meeting is probably when you receive information about K orientation, which varies from school to school, but orientation is usually in late April/May.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There was a "twins law" sponsored in the Maryland Senate (I think...) but it has not been enacted. In Virginia, apparently there is one on the books. Who knew?

OP, be prepared to back up your reasoning for keeping them together. I am a K teacher, and based on my experience, I would definitely not support having twins in the same class. Most principals I have ever dealt with feel the same. You haven't really stated your reasons, but you should have some kind of backup, other than "it's easier for me." Maybe have your pediatrician give some input.

You don't need to inform the principal that one of your twins is reading chapter books. In K, everyone comes in with a different skill set and classes are generally not formed based on that. It's more a matter of balancing gender and race/ethnicity. If you're concerned about coming across as a PITA, then for sure leave that part out.

The time to have this meeting is probably when you receive information about K orientation, which varies from school to school, but orientation is usually in late April/May.

Hi, OP. Mom of twins here. I had to be polite but very persistent to get the principal to consider having mine in the same class. What helped for me was having the following:
1. Recommendation from their preschool teacher to remain in the same class for kindergarten. Teacher said she would be happy to speak to principal or K teachers on why she thought that was best. Preschool teacher was able to honestly say that they would not be "clinging" to each other, and in reality spent little time in class sitting next to each other or doing the same activity, but they did like being able to look across the room, spot their sibling, see that things were okay, and then get back to whatever they were doing.
2. Had research available that indicated that for the early elementary years, twins do better when kept in the same classroom as when they are apart.
3. Assured principal that I was NOT asking for the kids to be in the same classroom throughout elementary, and if it was determined they were causing a disruption I would of course accept a transfer of the kids, but based on peer-reviewed research, the assessment of the teachers they had just spent a year with, and my own experience, I truly felt this would be the best arrangement for my kids, the teacher, and the classmates for the K year.
Agree with teacher who quoted above that "it's easier for me" is really not a good enough reason. As I mentioned, I made it clear I was asking for or expecting this for every year of elementary school.

There's lot of debate about this, and I know there are some twin parents that were very eager to have their kids in separate classrooms, and argue that it was best for their kids. I have no doubt that in many cases that is the best thing to do. I think a decision like this has to be made on a case-by-case basis.

Good luck to you and your family, OP!

[Anonymous]

OP the value of your meeting will be more to get a feel for whether your principal is accommodating to parents or not. Most public school principals see parents as a burden and really are not interested in your perspective. This is one of the key differences between private and public. At our school, you basically need to use reverse psychology to get the teacher that you want. A questionnaire is sent home and you can request qualities in a teacher but be prepared to get the exact opposite of your request. Our principal also makes a point of not only not honoring requests for a particular teacher but publicly tells people if they write in a teacher she will make sure that you do not get that teacher.

We like all the teachers and our kids are flexible so it hasn't been an issue for us. They can do fine with the so so teacher and the great teacher because they already know most of the curriculum. I have some friends with kids who are more sensitive or have special needs and they have been screwed several times.

[Anonymous]

I always found this law so strange. I grew up in Russia and in my class there were two sets of twins. It worked out just fine, they had their own as well as joint friends, not to mention different interests. Now that I am a mom of twins, I would advocate for both of them together in one class. I am sorry but the excuse "oh, they will be too clingy and distract the class" is a load of BS.

[Anonymous]

OP here - Thanks all for your comments. It never occurred to me that meeting with the principal isn't done. Seemed like a nice thing to do.

As for keeping my twins together, I'm not sure what I want to do so I also wanted to get the opinion of the principal, what she's seen work, etc. In my heart I want to keep them together, but they are at different academic levels with things coming much easier to one so I feel that it may be better to separate them so they don't compare themselves. But at the same time, they're great buddies, have done terrific doing their own things in preschool, etc. Not sure what we'll do....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - Thanks all for your comments. It never occurred to me that meeting with the principal isn't done. Seemed like a nice thing to do.

As for keeping my twins together, I'm not sure what I want to do so I also wanted to get the opinion of the principal, what she's seen work, etc. In my heart I want to keep them together, but they are at different academic levels with things coming much easier to one so I feel that it may be better to separate them so they don't compare themselves. But at the same time, they're great buddies, have done terrific doing their own things in preschool, etc. Not sure what we'll do....

You have to remember that you are in public school. It will not be your decision whether or not your twins stay together. The principal gets input from the teachers and the counseling staff on how class makeup should be. You should really look to the counselor for guidance, not the principal. The principal will really do very little for you.

The only time to meet with a principal is when major issues come up such as an IEP not being used correctly or major behavorial issues.

[Anonymous]

It never occurred to you that parents dont actually meet with the principal??? Really? There will likely be 100 new kindergarten kids entering your school next year. Do you think the principal has time to sit down and talk with all those parents one on one? Doesn't happen.

[Anonymous]

OP again -- A friend who was looking to buy a house in our neighborhood set up a meeting with the principal to get a feeling for the school, something that never would've crossed my mind, but made me think that if she did that, then I should certainly meet with the principal since we'll be going there (not just looking at houses).

[Anonymous]

At our school it seems like requests for special meetings like this assure you of getting the worst teacher. I would email the principal just about the aspect of putting them in the same class. Or perhaps talk with him/her at the K orientation. Definitely don't bring up the reading abilities thing. There will be other kids at or above yours, so nothing to note there.