Should I tell MIL it's my birthday?

[Anonymous]

My birthday (it's a biggie) happens to coincide with the date of DD's christening. MIL is very kindly throwing a party for the christening, and I'm not sure whether to tell her it's also my birthday. If I do, I'm sure she's going to feel obligated to do something for it even if I tell her I don't want her to (and I don't, really!). But we're Facebook friends and she spends a fair bit of time on Facebook, so I'm pretty sure she'll see it that morning when it's too late to do anything and I'm afraid she'll feel bad. (I would, in her position.) WWYD? Am I overthinking things?

[Anonymous]

Yes

[Anonymous]

(To the overthinking)

[Anonymous]

I would mention it to her in they way of telling her what a wonderful birthday gift it is for her to host the party! That way she knows about your birthday and is doing something for you, hosting the party.

[Anonymous]

If anyone tells her, it should be your husband, not you.

But why doesn't she already know when your birthday is?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If anyone tells her, it should be your husband, not you.

But why doesn't she already know when your birthday is?

+1

[Anonymous]

I agree with the person who said your husband should tell her.

[Anonymous]

My vote is do not tell her, and let her get all flustered and embarassed that she didn't realize she had forgotten your birthday on this [other] important occasion.

After all, as mothers, our birthdays are just not celebrated much the same anymore. Your husband will remember the day, that's all that matters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If anyone tells her, it should be your husband, not you.

But why doesn't she already know when your birthday is?

+1

I agree. Your husband should tell her and offer to help if they decide to add anything to the party for your birthday.

[Anonymous]

Just note, some adults are not big on doing special things for other adult birthdates. She may be one, so don't get your hopes up for a special birthday cake or gift.

[Anonymous]

Assuming the DD in question is your DD, then no. Let the christening party be about your DD and the event. You can celebrate your birthday another time. Assuming you scheduled the christening on your birthday it seems like it's already a choice you made to let your DD be in the spotlight.

[Anonymous]

I've been waiting all morning for OP to come back and explain why MIL doesn't know it's her birthday. Seriously, this is weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My birthday (it's a biggie) happens to coincide with the date of DD's christening. MIL is very kindly throwing a party for the christening, and I'm not sure whether to tell her it's also my birthday. If I do, I'm sure she's going to feel obligated to do something for it even if I tell her I don't want her to (and I don't, really!). But we're Facebook friends and she spends a fair bit of time on Facebook, so I'm pretty sure she'll see it that morning when it's too late to do anything and I'm afraid she'll feel bad. (I would, in her position.) WWYD? Am I overthinking things?

Why doesn't your MIL know when your birthday is? I'd have my DH remind his mother of your birthday.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've been waiting all morning for OP to come back and explain why MIL doesn't know it's her birthday. Seriously, this is weird.

Um, I don't have my MIL's birthday memorized. My mom doesn't have DH's b-day memorized. Not everyone is fixated on other people's birthdays beyond immediate family. Why is that so wierd to you?

[Anonymous]

2nd 10:09 here.

To me, the MIL/FIL *are* considered immediate family members becaue they are the parents of my spouse. They are also the grandparents to my kids.

The same logic would apply to my daughter-in-law/son-in-law, too, since they have married my child and are the mother/father to my grandchildren.